The Complete Ruby Redfort Collection. Lauren Child

are you doing here?’

      ‘Thought you might be interested in taking a little trip with me,’ said Ruby.

      ‘Sure I would, but I’ve got school – remember school? It’s that big building where all the kids hang out.’

      ‘Don’t stress it – I made a call. You’re off sick – that tooth of yours is a real pain in the cheek. Which, by the way, still looks puffy.’

      ‘You called the school and told them I was sick?’ Clancy was flapping his arms.

      ‘Well, your mom sorta called. I do a pretty good impersonation of her – Mrs Bexenheath certainly thought it was good.’

      It took about seven minutes but Ruby managed to convince Clancy that no one would suspect a thing if he skipped school – just this once.

      ‘So where are we going?’ he asked nervously.

      ‘Just taking a little trip to Tony’s hair salon, see if we can’t find out a little bit of information.’

      ‘But aren’t you gonna be missed – at Spectrum I mean?’

      ‘I took care of that,’ said Ruby. ‘I phoned Blacker and told him I needed to figure some things out – I explained I do it better in my own space.’

      They pulled up at Tony’s – the fancy hair salon just off Twinford Square.

      ‘So what are we doing here?’ asked Clancy.

      ‘Getting information. Just follow me, don’t speak – just, you know, keep it zipped’

      ‘Sir, yes sir,’ muttered Clancy.

      ‘Hey Ruby!’ said Marcia, ‘what are you doing in here? You retired from school or what?’ Marcia did Sabina’s hair and Ruby had been coming here since she could remember.

      ‘They’ve run out of things to teach me so they let me off for the day.’

      Marcia winked. ‘Oh I get it – don’t worry honey, I’m no snitch.’ She looked at Clancy. ‘What happened to you, kid? Get in a fight with a dentist?’

      Clancy rolled his eyes.

      ‘So,’ said Marcia, ‘what can I do for you?’

      ‘I was wondering if you knew a person called Carla Lopez?’

      ‘I know her, course I do – she’s a regular, why you asking?’

      ‘The last time she was in, did you notice anything odd?’

      ‘Odd? Like how?’

      ‘Was she out of sorts, distracted?’ suggested Ruby.

      ‘Well she did walk out of the salon with a couple of heated rollers in her hair so I guess you might say she was distracted, but it’s Sandy you might wanna talk to – she did Carla’s manicure.’ She pointed over to a tall young woman who was busy filing the nails of a dumpy lady with slightly blue hair. ‘Hey Sandy, the kid wants to talk to you!’

      Ruby walked over to the nail bar and sat down on the stool next to Sandy. Sandy kept on filing.

      ‘I was wondering, do you happen to remember doing the nails of a friend of mine a few weeks ago – Carla Lopez, long black hair, pretty, mid thirties?’

      ‘Yeah, I do!’ replied Sandy, filing more furiously. ‘She owes me a tip.’

      The lady with blue hair coughed – it wasn’t a real cough, more of a “do you mind?” sort of cough.

      Ruby ignored her.

      ‘What, she left without paying?’

      ‘I do her nails, get them all filed and regular and then I start applying the red polish and there I am telling her about my cousin’s fancy wedding at some fancy hotel and she suddenly jumps out of her seat and asks to see a phone directory. I say, “But lady, I haven’t finished painting your nails.” I wasn’t even done with the left hand but she doesn’t seem to care – she goes over to the phone booth, flicks through the phone book and then runs out the door – I thought, that’s one serious nut we got there.’

      ‘Thanks, you have been super helpful, Sandy,’ said Ruby, who was already moving towards the phone booth.

      ‘When you see her, tell her she still owes me that tip,’ called Sandy.

      Ruby flipped open the directory that was attached to the wall by a string, and hurriedly turned the pages.

      ‘What are you looking for?’ said Clancy

      ‘Something beginning with F,’ she replied.

      Ruby scanned down: Fountain Farm, Fountain Fresh Eggs, Fountain Garages, Fountain Gardens, Fountain Hotel.

      BINGO!

      And as if to confirm that she was exactly on the right track there was a little smudge of red nail polish next to the name.

      Ruby took her yellow notebook from her bag and scrawled the address and phone number on the inside cover.

      ‘Could you let me in on whatever it is you are doing?’ said Clancy.

      ‘We gotta go somewhere – it’s out of town.’

      ‘Where out of town?’ said Clancy

      ‘Everly,’ replied Ruby.

      ‘Everly? But that’s miles away – how are we gonna get there?’

      ‘Don’t suppose that chauffeur of yours is free?’

      ‘Oh no, Rube, you better not be thinking what I think you’re thinking.’

      Two minutes later Clancy found himself listening to Ruby doing a pretty good impersonation of his dad’s secretary.

      ‘Hello, Bill? Yes, I need you to drive Mr Crew’s son Clancy out to Everly… yes, Everly… it doesn’t matter why, he has to pick something up for his father… it’s a surprise so don’t mention anything about this. That clear? Good. All right, pick him up from Twinford Square right away. Thanks so much, oh and Bill, I mean it, no blabbing.’

      Ruby replaced the receiver and smiled at Clancy.

      ‘If my dad finds out, I am going to be dead meat Rube, I mean it, dead as a dingo.’

      ‘Dodo,’ replied Ruby.

      ‘Now you’re calling me a dodo?’

      ‘No, it’s dead as a dodo, not dead as a dingo.’

      Clancy sighed. ‘Well, whatever I am as dead as, it doesn’t change the fact that I will be dead, so who cares if it’s a dog or a bird!’

      Seven minutes later the large black limousine cruised by and they got in.

      ‘This beats the bus,’ said Ruby, nudging Clancy with her elbow. Clancy rolled his eyes. ‘I may well throw up.’

      ‘I don’t think your dad would like that,’ said Ruby.

      ‘Could you at least quit clicking– it’s getting on my nerves and my nerves are a little frayed right now,’ said Clancy in an exaggerated whisper.

      Ruby hadn’t really been aware that she was clicking, she had been too busy thinking.

      ‘What is it anyway? That thing you are clicking?’

      She pulled LB’s keyring out of her pocket. ‘Just some old keyring I found.’

      ‘Looks kinda dumb,’ said Clancy. ‘Cool in a way but sorta dorky – where’d ya get it?’

      ‘Just sorta picked it up,’ said Ruby, stuffing it back into her pocket.

       Chapter 23.

      Funny peculiar

      FORTY