The Dead Fathers Club. Matt Haig

and I picked up the phone.

      Mr Rosen stopped snoring and starting making eating sounds click click click.

      I froze still and held my breath with the phone in my hand and waited for him to roll over and back to snoring sleep.

      Then I followed Dads Ghost through the dark and tried to step on the floor every time Mr Rosen snored so he didnt hear me and I got to the door and opened it as small as possible because it was letting light get in and I slid through and shut it click.

      And I went down the corridor and Dads Ghost was there and more pale now he was in the light. I tip toed past Mrs Fells room and where Charlotte Ward and all the girls were sleeping. The walls were white and the carpet was blue and like Brillo Pads under my feet. I went into the toilets and there was water on the floor and I hoped it was water on the floor and Dads Ghost said Philip youve got to call her. Youve got to tell her to get out of the Pub. Some people are going to come. Bad people.

      I started to press the numbers 01636 and I asked Dad What should I say?

      And he said Anything just make her get out.

      I dialled the rest of the number 366520 and there was a click and my heart was going beatbeatbeat.

      It started to ring and Dads Ghost said Whats happening?

      And I said Its ringing.

      And it rang three times and then there was another click and it was Mum sounding posh like when she talks to Teachers saying You have reached the Noble residence. No one is able to take your call at the moment. Please leave your message after the tone.

      And there was a beeeep and I said Mum are you there? Mum its me are you there? Youve got to get out of the house because I know something is going to happen. Something really bad.

      And then Dad said Try the other number.

      I said What number?

      He said For the bar.

      So I called the bar number. And when the phone was ringing I heard feet outside and I put the phone in my pyjama pocket but it was girl feet going to the other toilets.

      And I picked the phone back out of my pocket and it was Dads voice Dads real voice not his ghost voice and it was saying Hello. This is the Castle and Falcon. Nottinghamshires home for REAL Ale. We are closed right now so please leave your message after the beep.

      beeeep

      Mum must have forgot to change the message. It felt weird listening to Dads voice in front of his ghost and I forgot to speak but then Dads Ghost nodded and I knew what the nod meant so I said in a loud quiet voice Mum. Mum. Can you hear me? Mum. Mum. Its me. Youve got to go to Renukas tonight because something bad is going to happen in the Pub. Mum. Wake up. Please wake up.

      And I kept talking but Mum didnt wake up and I went quiet when I heard the chain flush next door and girl feet go by the door again.

      And I looked at Dads Ghost and said in a whisper What should I do?

      And I worried he was going to flicker out but he wasnt flickering at all.

      The Mini Bus

      Dads Ghost looked at me with the most serious face I had ever seen like Norman Osborn in the first Spiderman when he has the nerve gas before he becomes the Green Goblin and he said By his phone were some keys.

      And I said What?

      He said By Mr Rosens phone there were some keys. They will be the keys to one of the mini buses.

      My face was now even more serious than Dads Ghosts face because I was very scared about what he was about to say and about what I was going to say and it was one of those times when you know the words before you say them but you say them anyway as if you are reading from a book and they went like this.

      He said You have to take the keys.

      I said Why?

      He said You have to drive the mini bus.

      I said I cant.

      He said I will teach you. I will tell you what to do. You have driven before. Remember I showed you in the car park in Mums Ka car.

      I said Thats a small car not like a mini bus and I only did it for ten minutes and I was rubbish and this is stealing and Ill be in trouble.

      He said Sometimes you have to do something that is wrong to do something bigger that is right. Mum is in a lot of trouble tonight Philip. A lot of trouble. Some men are coming to the Pub later tonight Philip. Theyve got baseball bats and one of them has got a gun. Youve got to get to Mum and make her safe.

      I said I wont have time.

      And he said You will have time. They are coming to the Pub at half past four when all the streets are quiet. It is only midnight and a three hour drive if we go fast.

      And I thought of other things I could do like tell a Teacher but they wouldnt believe me or phone Renuka or Nan but I didnt have their numbers. I could have phoned 118 118 for Renukas number but she is X Direct because of the bad phone calls and I couldnt remember Nans address. Dads Ghost was mind reading because he said Theres no other way.

      I went back down the corridor.

      The quiet was screaming and I got to the door and I pressed down the handle and held my breath like I was going underwater. I opened the door and closed it but not all the way and Dads Ghost went through me and in front and pointed at the floor where the keys were. Mr Rosen was snoring and I bent and didnt breathe and my hand went low and touched the carpet and then I moved my hand like a SPIDER and touched cold metal and picked them up in a tight fist clink and I stood up and started to walk out still dark underwater and Mr Rosen turned over and said my name like a question Philip? and I looked at Dads Ghost and Dads Ghost said Tell him youre going to the toilet and I said Im going to the toilet and Mr Rosen made a noise which was like OK but he was falling back to sleep and Dads Ghost pointed to my shoes and my jumper on the floor and I picked them up and I kept going and out and shut the door click.

      We went back down the corridor fast and quietly on the Brillo Pads and one of my shoes was wanting to escape and not steal the mini bus and was coming out of my arms. I walked really fast past Mrs Fells room and the toilets and the girls room but at the end of the corridor the shoe dropped clump on the floor. I picked it up and pushed the door at the end which had glass like Maths books and then I turned right past the posters about Hadrians Wall and Housesteads and the fire alarm and got to the other door which had a special handle I had to turn but Dads Ghost just went through.

      Outside it was COLD and I sat on the step under the lamp and put my shoes on. They felt weird because I had no socks and I put my jumper on but still felt cold because I had my pyjama bottoms on.

      Dads Ghost was halfway to the car park and telling me with his hand to hurry up so I stood and ran and let my feet get louder as we got further away from the building and the light. And then I saw Dads Ghost turn white and turn into a strange shape with lots of straight lines moving in the air and the lines came towards me fast and that is how ghosts fly. And when he got to me he landed and looked like Dads Ghost again and said There are two mini buses.

      I said Yes I know.

      He said Lets see the keys.

      I showed him the keys and he said I think its for the red mini bus not the white one.

      And I got to the car park and I couldnt see the red bus because you cant see colours in the dark but I could see white so I went to the other mini bus.

      Beatbeatbeat

      It was very WINDY now and there were trees near the car park and they were just black shapes like thin necks and round faces with big hair coming out of the ground and the wind was making them shake their heads and their hair like they were saying Dont do it. Dont steal the mini bus.

      I looked back at the building and the other building and the stables and I thought of everyone sleeping and I felt sick but