The Complete Plays of J. M. Barrie - 30 Titles in One Edition. Джеймс Барри

— too — too —

       His too fatal beauty.

       When I was a — when he was a little man,

       Only just of age,

       Off to London then he ran,

       And became the rage.

       High and low they loved us so — him so,

       And claimed him for their booty;

       And the reason well I know,

       Was our — was my — was his too — too — too —

       His too — too fatal beauty.

      DANCE.

      PROCTOR takes the applause meant for BULLDOGS and exit.

      SIM. You can say it now, Greg.

      GREG. —— —— — !

      BULLDOGS exeunt arm in arm, R. Enter OFFICERS and JACK.

      MILITARY CHORUS. — JACK and OFFICERS.

      OFFICERS. We are conscious that we slightly condescend,

      JACK. Right turn!

      OFFICERS. But we couldn’t go and disoblige a friend,

      JACK. Left turn!

      OFFICERS. Yet it’s infra dig., you see,

       For such warriors as we

       To come out to cakes and tea

       At a school.

      JACK. Stand at ease!

      JACK. Now a midnight oyster supper would be nice,

      OFFICERS. Very nice!

      JACK. Or anything with just a touch of vice;

      OFFICERS. Just a spice

      JACK. But coming fresh, you know,

       From slaughtering the foe,

       It’s just a trifle slow

       At a school!

      OFFICERS. Mark time

      OFFICERS. Now a midnight oyster supper would be nice,

      JACK. Right turn!

      OFFICERS. Or anything with just a touch of vice;

      JACK. Left turn!

      OFFICERS. But coming fresh, you know,

       From slaughtering the foe,

       It’s just a trifle slow

       At a school!

      JACK. Dress line!

      JACK. Yet from the invitation it is clear,

      OFFICERS. Quite clear!

      JACK. There are maids whose leisure moments we may cheer;

      OFFICERS. Hear! Hear!

      JACK. So as a soldier brave

       Is ever beauty’s slave,

       We had a wash and shave,

       And we’ve come!

      OFFICERS. Yet from the invitation it is clear,

      JACK. Left turn!

      OFFICERS. There are maids whose leisure moments we may cheer;

      JACK. Right turn!

      OFFICERS. So as a soldier brave

       Is ever beauty’s slave,

       We had a wash and shave,

       And we’ve come!

      JACK. Stand at ease!

       Enter MISS SIMS and JANE ANNIE.

      MISS S. How dare you come here!

      JACK. We come by invitation, madam. Haw!

      MISS S. Whose invitation?

      JACK. Yours.

      MISS S. I invite you here! You are mad!

      JACK. We had a letter from you.

      MISS S. (distracted). Oh, these letters! (Talks aside to JANE ANNIE.)

      JACK (to 1ST OFFICER). Never mind her. I want you all to flirt outrageously with the other girls, and while Miss Sims is trying to stop you I shall bolt with Bab. Do you think you could do that, old man? (OFFICER Pulls his moustache confidently). Ask the others. (1ST

      OFFICER goes to other OFFICERS, who repeat business.)

       Enter CADDIE.

      CADDIE. Please, ma’am, the brass band is here.

      MISS S. Brass band!

      CADDIE. Yes, ma’am, they say they had a letter from you. And the man has come with the bull-pups.

      MISS S. Oh, I am going mad!

      CADDIE. Yes, ma’am.

      MISS S. Let us go and lock the gates. (Exit excitedly.)

      JANE A. (to CADDIE). Do let me kiss you, Caddie!

      CADDIE. Too late! Revenge!

      JANE A. But you wanted me to do it five minutes ago.

      CADDIE. I was a boy then. (Exit.)

       Enter some of the GIRLS from a boat.

      JACK (to JANE ANNIE). Do you know where my Bab is?

      JANE A. Bother Bab!

      JACK. Eh?

      JANE A. I had such a nice dream about you, last night.

      JACK. No, had you? Haw!

      JANE A. Yes, I dreamt that you were to elope with me instead of with Bab.

      JACK. Not if I know it.

      JANE A. Perhaps you won’t know it at this time — but you’ll know it afterwards.

      JACK (aside). I dislike this girl very much.

      JANE A. (to GIRLS who are flirting with OFFICERS). I have been left in charge to see that you all behave yourselves.

      ROSE. Oh!

      JANE A. You and I, Jack, will set them an example.

      CONCERTED PIECE. —

      JANE ANNIE, JACK, GIRLS, OFFICERS, and STUDENTS.

      JANE ANNIE. You and I, dear Jack, will show A most excellent example.

      JACK. Scarce can they in virtue grow,

       If they take me for their sample.

      JANE ANNIE. If you list to my advice,

       Keep young men at a safe distance.

       She draws JACK’s arm round her waist.

      JACK. This is strange, and yet it’s nice,

       I shall offer no resistance.

      ENSEMBLE.

      GIRLS. OFFICERS. In accord with her This is strange, and yet it’s advice, nice,

       We shall keep you at We shall offer no a distance. resistance.

       Drawing OFFICERS’ arms round.

      ALL. We/They have learned her/my precept pat,

       We/They mustn’t do that! We/They mustn’t do that!

       And so, of course, the sequence is,

       We/They mustn’t do this! We/They mustn’t do this!

      JANE ANNIE. You and I will also show

       A correct and sober bearing.

      JACK. Though her words are cold as snow,

       Yet her glance is most ensnaring.

      JANE ANNIE. If you list to my advice,

       You will never start off dancing.