Confession of a Ghost. F.M. Dostoevsky award. Playing Another Reality. Alexandra Kryuchkova

in the morning and go to the Tower without visiting any of your acquaintances along the way,” Ray said, and the connection broke off.

      37 Before/4 After. House No. I

      Children of Saturn

      Somewhere in the Universe

      Saturn was sitting in his armchair by the fireplace.

      “Joice Mary NanKivell Loch,” he said, closing the book, “14 Fingers of St. Peter. Joice will serve on Earth for 95 years. Saturn is the planet of old people and long life, but as a guest of your Moon with her emotional reactions… On the one hand, a suppressed Self, on the other, an extraordinary endurance and a deep Self-digging. Reticence, few words speaking and seriousness are not such bad qualities inherent in hermits and monks. Moreover, brevity is the sister of talent. Unlike those who like to chat, promise mountains and then disappear, you are a true friend and always help in deed and word. Saturn is the planet of the wise ones. Saturn children are said to be born old and die young.”

      “Can children be born old?”

      “No, but it’s in childhood that something happens to them that makes them adults compared to their peers, grandparents play a significant role. Forced early growing up leads to the fact that no matter how old one is later, one tries to compensate for those carefree childhood years, one was deprived of, in order to feel like a real child.”

      “Why are people deprived of childhood? Is it fair?” I exclaimed.

      “Look how sharply you stand up for justice! Saturn’s children call for justice and reason, but most people think only of themselves. Leave to the Creator the right to decide the destinies. On Earth, it’s impossible to fully comprehend His intentions in order to correctly interpret what is happening. The spiritual path is not strewn with rose petals. Place the soul in comfortable conditions, and in 99% of cases it will lose touch with Heaven, plunging into the mundane and transient. Heaven has other plans for people like you.”

      “Saturn is a teacher,” the Guardian clarified. “He gives difficulties as an exam.”

      “In the worst case scenario, you’ll turn into a gloomy lazy person, cursing fate, into a miser-materialist, saving up for old age, hating people and Heaven at the same time, fixed on the bad and, as a result, attracting more and more negative events like a snowball. I don’t like such people, and they are doomed to constant physical and moral restrictions up to the deprivation of reason. I hope you’ll humbly accept the hardships of life and begin to radiate Love and Light, turning into a highly spiritual being who serves the world by constant and hard work and imperceptibly ascends to your own, albeit not the highest, Mountain. Saturn at its best is the rock of the Spirit, and no waves of the Moon can break you. In the course of searching for a stone wall somewhere on the side, being the Moon, you will turn into it yourself, being Saturn.”

      “Is Saturn in my House No. 1 forever?”

      “The planets move in their circle, like the hands of any clocks. The current position of Saturn shows you the Sphere where the major work is to be done. At the control points, the analysis of the soul’s mission on Earth takes place, decisions are made about the further destiny. At the moment of your incarnation, I’m 13 degrees from the point of your first breath, on the border with House No. 2. One degree is conventionally equal to a year of earthly life. Thus all the fundamental Saturn events will occur before your 13^th birthday.”

      “All? Will there be several?”

      “Let’s talk about something pleasant,” Saturn stroked my head. “Each planet can have friendly and hostile relations with other planets. I’m friends with your Venus. She loves art and creative expression and has great taste. I’m good at maths, proportions, rhythm, concentration and hard work. The Moon is a symbol of a rich inner world and depth of feelings. This is a chance to open up through creativity – music, poetry, painting, sculpture and architecture. Don’t accumulate energy within yourself, transform the suffering of the Moon into something beautiful and filled with Love, like Venus, and wise, like Saturn. Speaking of literature, say not much, but deep. An innate low Self-esteem will protect you from pride, and Venus and I will bring well-deserved fame and recognition. Such aspect is found in outstanding figures of culture and art and in great mathematicians. Let’s go to admire the stars on the balcony, since the rain is over!”

      We went to the balcony through the next room. The sky became completely cloudless, and the stars were so bright and close that it seemed easy to touch them with hand.

      “Look, right above the Tower, there is the Canis Minor Constellation and one of the brightest stars, Procyon. We are in conjunction in one degree. Dangerous star, it promotes not only sudden rise, good fortune and fame, but also downfall. It gives courage and bravery, but enhances irascibility, straightforwardness and honesty, one may offend others with one’s words. If you start to do everything in a hurry or get angry at the world, a cute dog will turn into a mad one and bite you to death. If you treat your work with devotion and work painstakingly and humbly, Procyon will wag your tail and will definitely thank you.”

      “Procyon is accented in the passport of Emile Zola the writer,” the Guardian whispered.

      “I’m in House No. 1, at the Door to House No. 2, the Sphere of Finance. My influence extends to both Spheres, although I’m responsible for the other two,” said Saturn thoughtfully. “In particular, I manage House No. 7, the Sphere of Partnership and Marriage. Conjunction with Procyon promotes inheritance, gives patronage and support of VIP and old people, partnership with them in business and marriage. But not all that glitters is gold, Rukh, and the details are to be talked about not here.”

      Library of the Universe

      “Angel, will I have anything good in my life?”

      “You’ll have me, isn’t that good?” The Guardian hugged me with his wing, “Life on Earth is short but interesting. You’ll be back before you understand that. Souls descend to serve the world. Happiness in the earthly sense is transient and conditional. At true hard times, remember that there is always someone who is even harder.”

      The book opened at the page with the story “Farewell to Childhood”.

      “Time doesn’t exist. It’s conditional and relative. You will learn to manage Time when you realize that it doesn’t matter how old you are on Earth. The main thing is who you feel you are.”

      Joice the Ghost

      Ouranoupoli

      Without even having breakfast, I left the house and headed for to the Tower. Unlike many, Ray had never deceived me or said anything for nothing. However, Dimitra, whose icon shop was directly opposite the Tower, couldn’t help but know whether it was open or not.

      You could get to the Tower through the central and sea streets, every cat on both of them knew me. I flew along the sea street, praying that no one would call me out, and the prayer worked well. The gate to the courtyard, as well as the door to the Tower, appeared to be open! Two women were talking outside the office on the right.

      “Good morning! May I come in? Is it free of charge or not?” I asked, but they continued their conversation, as if nothing had happened and retreated to the room on the left.

      “So it’s free,” I decided, and delved inside.

      The door in the far left corner led to rooms displaying the finds from excavations on the territory of Athos, including the Zygou Monastery. I froze at the exhibits, studying their description. There were burial vessels dating back to 1100 BC, ritual accessories, copper helmets from the bottom of the sea dated to the 6^th century BC, and women’s jewelry in the showcases. I liked especially the ring with a five-pointed star and a bird with open