Confession of a Ghost. F.M. Dostoevsky award. Playing Another Reality. Alexandra Kryuchkova

and we’ll take Eugene to keep us company.”

      Who is Eugene? Why Venice? I don’t understand, but it hurts. I turn sharply to the left and step into the Mist, towards the Moonlight Sonata, which calls me to it, but out of the Mist appears

      …my mother. All in black. She doesn’t want… what? – me to go to Venice?

      And the voice, that imperious male voice, shouts at me,

      “Why did Eugene give you a rose?! And what about you with Victor?!”

      Who are these Eugene and Victor? The Mist creeps over my Consciousness, and I start running away, towards the Moon, it’s getting closer and closer, but the female voice stops me, “Don’t leave him! Help him!”

      I pause for a moment to remember who they are. In vain! The Moonlight Sonata merges their voices into one, and the Mist draws trees in the park, it beckons me to where … I turn around sharply, take a step in the opposite direction and fall down…

      …into a white room, where the same male voice sounds,

      “Make me this project, and we’ll definitely go somewhere with you.”

      Who is he? And why do I feel so bad that I want to dissolve in the Moonlight Sonata, which pours into me in waves, and I’m no longer pacing, I’m running again, trying to get out of the nightmarish labyrinth, however, out of the Mist emerges…

      …a table with candles … I don’t see his face, but he hands me a glass of wine.

      “Happy birthday, darling! I want to drink for you to die before me!” and he drinks to the bottom.

      “Don’t leave him! Help him!” a female voice is heard, though already much weaker, while the Moonlight Sonata sounds louder and louder, and I hear him shouting,

      “Who the hell are you?”

      I abruptly get up and leave, without turning around, farther and farther, to the place where the Moonlight Sonata sounds so loudly that I can no longer hear anyone’s voices … No one’s at all… Absolutely …

      36 Before/5 After. House No. I

      Magic Ring

      Somewhere in the Universe

      We returned to the Tower and found ourselves in a secret room with book shelves along the walls and a table with a single candlestick in the center. Saturn lit candles, materialized armchairs and invited us to sit down.

      “Here is the most interesting, Rukh. These are copies of books from the Library of the Universe. Why do you think they are here?”

      “Are they important to you?”

      “They are interesting to me. I study them, highlighting and writing something out. I re-read them and underline. Thematically, they relate to one of the Spheres that I’m in charge of. See which one.”

      “Death and Magic?!”

      “Exactly. Staying in your House of Life, I’m in charge of your Death and Magic (House No. 8), and I help Uranus with his House No. 9 – the Spiritual Path, Teachers.”

      “Wow!” I exclaimed, unable to restrain myself, and instantly remembered the Future. “My main planet is you the Death, and you live in my Self?! The major Saturn events will occur before my 13^th birthday, so will I die as a child?”

      “Not bad for a start,” Saturn looked at the Guardian. “Phenomenal speed of learning. I don’t like splashes of the Moon and chaotic knowledge. The energy of Death is that of Scorpio-Pluto, and in your case, I carry it. Such Saturn-Pluto. The Master of Death in the House of Life is a hard case, it leads either to self-destruction, because Scorpio is inclined to sting himself, being depressed, or to a colossal transformation of personality, giving a person extraordinary vitality and cool blood in extreme situations, such ones survive where all others go to Heaven in a heartbeat. I’ll constantly put you on the threshold of Death. You are a magnet that attracts life-critical situations. However, having experienced Death and the exit of the soul from the body in childhood – I immerse a person in something with head, make one sink to the very bottom instead of floating on the surface – you’ll cease to be afraid of Death! You’ll explore Death with great interest, as a scientist dissects an insect under a microscope! – all types, methods, causes, as well as states of the soul after the transition to the Subtle World. You’ll have an extremely keen sense of Death!”

      I silently listened to Saturn and refused to believe it.

      “Now about the Magic. The energy of Pluto endows me with magical powers. Our conjunction with Procyon inclines towards the occult. Sirius, the star under which you incarnate, is a sign of those initiated into secret knowledge. And the location of your hypersensitive Moon means an open door to Subtle World. The danger for you is in the following.

      First, Pluto throws a person into the pool of earthly passions of carnal love. You’ll be charming and attractive. Plutonic energy turns people into sexual magnets. There is a danger that you’ll sink into the realm of sexual practices, connecting to the energies of the Lower Astral. We’ll have to prematurely recall you from Earth, because such behavior contradicts the Creator’s plans for your incarnation.

      Second, having innate paranormal abilities and knowing all the mechanisms of magic, experimenting with the Space of Time, calculating scenarios for the development of events, like a chess player tries to foresee the game 10 moves ahead, and possessing mathematical abilities, as well as influence on people, you’ll start practicing magic and become a hacker of the Matrix.

      Third. I’m in charge of the Sphere of Partnership and Marriage, you are attracted to magical people with pronounced Pluto. The relation of Spheres 1—7 (“I” and “they”) means “like attracts the like”, but you are interested in the older, stronger and smarter ones. Sphere No. 7 shows your enemies as well. Sorcerer partners are capable of destroying you. I’m in the degree called “Moth flying to the Light”, of Mars and Pluto energies, which gives painful susceptibility, excessive gullibility, a tendency to fall under the influence of others, a predisposition to violent and mysterious death. The Master of Death in the House of Life is 1 of the 2 components of the self-destruction formula with a return ahead of schedule.”

      I jumped in my chair, since the windowsill from the Future appeared in front of me.

      “Yes, the second component is also available, it’s the assistant of your Death, Uranus,” Saturn continued gloomily, “a sudden collapse, sudden death.”

      “No!” I jumped up from my chair. “I don’t want to be incarnated like that!”

      “My soul, calm down,” the Guardian embraced me with wings. “Only in 8 out of 10 cases, people with such formula leave Earth ahead of schedule and on their own. Selene guarantees the Higher Forces support! We’ll do our best to keep you safe!”

      “We’ll discuss the options of Death in House No. 8,” Saturn said with a heavy sigh. “Now we are inside your Self, personality. Saturn is the planet of the old ones. Some of your grandparents will be white magician with strong Selene, and someone black magician with strong Pluto. Your childhood will be spent in the atmosphere of Death and Magic. If you survive, you’ll get a chance for a radical transformation of your personality. I plan to send you to the church school at the main Patriarch’s cathedral. You’ll study there about five years, reading a lot and, given my friendship with Venus, writing. Later, Uranus and I will send you some spiritual teachers. Make right conclusions, or at least one,” Saturn smiled. “It seems to be a tiny House with only 13 degrees inside, and how many energies intersect in it!”

      I smiled, and we moved into the dungeon to the Well of Memory.