Skulduggery Pleasant: Books 1 - 12. Derek Landy

      t a little after nine that evening, a large bread van pulled up at the back of the Hibernian Cinema. It attracted no attention. A car with tinted windows followed and parked beside it. Again, nobody noticed.

      Tanith was leaning against the doorframe of a spare room at the front of the Medical Facility. Ghastly had brought some of his equipment there so he could work while Kenspeckle carried out whatever tests he had to carry out. Tanith watched Ghastly, sitting at a table, making Valkyrie’s new clothes. He was telling Tanith about his mother.

      The rear doors of the bread van opened and the men who jumped out did so silently and without fuss. They were dressed in grey and had scythes strapped to their backs.

      “My mother was a boxer,” Ghastly said, testing the stitching on a sleeve. “Her nose was broken four times, but according to my dad, she was still the prettiest woman in any room.”

      “I’ve heard some of the stories,” Tanith said. “She sounded like a remarkable woman.”

      Ghastly smiled. “I fought alongside her at the Battle of Black Rock, and I saw some of Mevolent’s best men just turn and run. She fought both Serpine and Vengeous and beat them both into retreat. ‘Remarkable’ doesn’t even begin to describe her. She was magnificent, right up to the end.”

      “How did she die?”

      “She made a mistake,” he said. “She went up against Lord Vile.”

      An old man who moved more like a young man got out of the car. He had an air about him of someone who was accustomed to wielding authority. His eyes were cold. The man who got out after him had a weak chin and no such authority, but his eagerness was evident for any who wished to see.

      The man with the cold eyes walked into the cinema and the eager man gestured to the men in grey. They moved like liquid, seeping into the building through windows and side doors and skylights, the eager man scurrying along behind.

      High on a rooftop beside the cinema, a figure stood in the darkness and watched.

      Ghastly put the coat to one side and went to work on the tunic. “There was a rule we had back then. You don’t go up against Vile alone. You wait until your army is gathered behind you, you all attack together and you pray someone gets in a lucky shot.”

      “Vile was that dangerous?”

      Ghastly shrugged. “Maybe, maybe not. It’s hard to separate the fiend from the legend, you know? He had appeared from nowhere, became Mevolent’s most fearsome General and then disappeared – all in the space of a few years. He had that armour, and that Necromancer power, and wherever he went he left a trail of destruction in his wake. My mother went up against him and he killed her, and he would have killed me but for—”

      Clarabelle stepped in and Ghastly fell silent. “Have you seen the Professor?” she asked.

      “Sorry,” Tanith said. “Anything wrong?”

      “There’s a man in the cinema. He insists on speaking with Professor Grouse and he refuses to give his name. He is quite rude.”

      “Why don’t you look for the Professor?” Ghastly suggested. “We’ll have a talk with whoever it is, find out what he wants.”

      “That would be much appreciated,” Clarabelle responded, suddenly smiling widely. She walked on, humming a little tune to herself.

      Tanith and Ghastly set off towards the cinema, descending the steps into gloom. They passed through the door in the screen and emerged on to the stage. A man stood in the centre aisle between the rows of musty seats.

      “Mr Bespoke,” Thurid Guild said, his voice echoing slightly, “welcome back to the land of the living.”

      “Guild. What brings you here?”

      “It’s Grand Mage actually,” Guild corrected. “But you’ve been a statue for two years – I’m sure I can forgive you one little slip.”

      “It wasn’t a slip.”

      “What can we do for you?” Tanith asked, making her voice as cold and unwelcoming as possible.

      “You can do nothing for me,” Guild said. “I’m here to speak with the owner of this facility.”

      “What’s this about?”

      “Sanctuary business, I’m afraid.”

      Tanith looked around. The cinema was pitched in gloom and shadow. “You’re here alone?”

      “Why shouldn’t I be? I am among friends, am I not?”

      “That depends,” Ghastly said. “Do you count Skulduggery Pleasant as a friend?”

      Guild smiled tightly. “Pleasant is a traitor.”

      “That’s what he said about you,” Tanith pointed out.

      “Skulduggery Pleasant is working with the Diablerie. Along with the girl, he aided in stealing the remains of the Grotesquery for unlawful purposes, and when confronted, he resisted arrest, assaulted Sanctuary personnel and evaded capture. He is an enemy of the Sanctuary and an enemy of all right-thinking people.”

      Kenspeckle emerged from the door in the screen to join Tanith and Ghastly. “What do you want, Grand Mage?”

      “Ah, Professor. I require a mere moment of your time.”

      “My mere moments are precious. Say what you have to say.”

      Guild nodded graciously. “You are aware, I presume, of the threat posed by the Diablerie. You are aware of their plans involving the Grotesquery’s remains and the last Teleporter, a boy called Fletcher Renn.”

      “I am.”

      “I have reason to believe that this boy is being kept on these premises. I would like you to turn him over to me, if you please.”

      “Grand Mage, I assure you I do not—”

      Guild held up a hand. “Professor. I hold you in great regard. I admire your work and your principles. I implore you, do not do yourself the injustice of attempting to lie to me, when I know the boy is here. I would prefer it that you stay silent rather than fumble with a clumsy half-truth. Such things are beneath you.”

      Tanith glanced at Kenspeckle and saw the colour rise in his cheeks.

      “Grand Mage,” Kenspeckle said, “do not presume to know a person on the basis of a handful of meetings. This can instil irritation, and an immediate unwillingness to co-operate. Likewise, do not flatter in the hope of shaming that person into co-operation, and do not, under any circumstances, condescend. The fact of the matter is that while I do know of Fletcher Renn, I do not know of his whereabouts. I’m sorry, I cannot help you.”

      Guild shook his head. “You disappoint me, Professor.”

      A high-pitched alarm shrieked through the door in the screen, and Tanith and Ghastly spun.

      “I’d stay here if I were you,” Guild advised.

      “What have you done?” Kenspeckle asked, but from the look in his eyes Tanith could tell he already knew the answer. Guild wasn’t standing here to request that Fletcher Renn be handed over – he was standing here to distract them.

      “My Cleavers have penetrated your Facility’s defences,” Guild responded, almost lazily. “They have orders to subdue, not to harm – but they will use force if they deem it necessary.”

      “You have no right!” Kenspeckle thundered.

      “We came here for the boy and we’re not leaving without him.”

      Ghastly was