Skulduggery Pleasant: Books 1 - 12. Derek Landy

would move me back to the sea? You could do that?”

       “The world has changed since you were first trapped here. There are water tanks big enough to hold you and vehicles powerful enough to transport you. I ask again, my lady – would you be interested?”

       “Yes,” said the Sea Hag, smiling for the first time in a hundred years. “Oh, yes.”

      

      he Purple Menace pulled into Gordon’s estate, and Valkyrie took the door key from her pocket and slid it into the lock. The alarm beeped insistently until she entered the code.

      Gordon’s house, for it would always be his house and never hers, not even on the day she turned eighteen, was big and quiet and empty.

      “I’ll start in here,” Skulduggery said, walking in behind her and heading for the living room. “If you want to start in the study, hopefully we’ll find something by morning.”

      “Hopefully,” Valkyrie said and climbed the stairs. She went into the study, closed the door behind her, then made straight for the large bookcase along the wall. She pulled back the false book, the bookcase swung open and she passed through into the small room beyond. For once, she didn’t even glance at the objects and artefacts on the shelves around her. The Echo Stone in the cradle on the table started to glow and a slightly overweight man in shirtsleeves shimmered into view. He grinned.

      “Hello there,” he said. “I take it, by the serious look on your face, that this is business and you haven’t just dropped by because you miss your dear dead uncle?”

      Valkyrie raised an eyebrow. “Is that who you are now? You’re Gordon? Not just a recording of his personality?”

      “That’s who I am,” Gordon said proudly.

      “And you’re sure about this? You’re not going to change your mind halfway through this conversation?”

      “I have come to a decision. The flesh and blood Gordon may have imprinted me on to this Echo Stone, but I continue to learn, to experience, to evolve. I make my own memories now. I am as real a person as he was, and because we were the same person, I am now him, now that he’s not. It all comes down to philosophy really. I think, therefore I am, I think.”

      “That’s good to know,” Valkyrie nodded. “To be honest with you, I see you as my real uncle too.”

      “Well, that’s that then.”

      “Does this mean I can tell Skulduggery about you now?”

      “Ah,” he said. “Not yet. I … I’m not ready for other people to know what I have been … reduced to. But it won’t be long now before you can share me, I promise.”

      “Well, good. I don’t like keeping this secret.”

      “I understand and I appreciate it. So tell me, how are your parents?”

      “They’re good. It’s their anniversary tomorrow so they’re heading to Paris in the morning.”

      “Ah, Paris,” Gordon said wistfully. “I’ve always felt a real affinity for the French, you know. One of my books was set in France, among the cathedrals and along the Champs-Élysées.”

      She nodded. “Braineater. It was one of your best. Gordon, have you ever heard of a man called Batu?”

      “I don’t think so, no.”

      “We think he’s behind a series of murders, and he wants to use a Teleporter to open a gateway between this reality and whatever reality the Faceless Ones are stuck in.”

      “Is that possible?”

      “Skulduggery seems to be taking it seriously, so I imagine it is.”

      “So what can I do to help?”

      “If the Faceless Ones return, we’re going to need the Sceptre to stop them.”

      “But didn’t you tell me that Skulduggery broke it?”

      “The crystal doesn’t work any more, but if we got another crystal …”

      “Ah. And you want to know if I found out anything about them in my research.”

      “Exactly.”

      “Well, you’re in luck, because I found out a lot.”

      “Do you know where we could get one?”

      “I do as a matter of fact.”

      “Really? Where?”

      Gordon pointed down and Valkyrie frowned.

      “In your shoes?”

      “In the caves.”

      She blinked. “Seriously? There are black crystals in the caves beneath this house? Mind telling me why?”

      “This house was built over the mouth of the caves hundreds of years ago, by a sorcerer named Anathem Mire.”

      “Skulduggery told me about him. He used to throw his enemies into the caves and let the monsters at them.”

      “He was not, as you can imagine, a very nice man.”

      “Did he worship the Faceless Ones?”

      “No, but he studied them. He studied the literature and the history of the Faceless Ones and the Ancients because he wanted power. He bought the land, built the house and made some tentative efforts to explore the caves. He wanted the secrets the caves hold, and they do hold a lot of secrets.”

      “Like what?”

      “Why are the creatures down there unaffected by magic? Is it something in the air? In the rocks? Is it because of the mix of minerals? Is it something else? There is no explanation for it, Valkyrie. We simply do not know. According to his journals, Mire made seven expeditions into the caves. The first had a ten-man crew. Mire was the only one to return. In the second, fifteen sorcerers were lost. Again, Anathem Mire was the sole survivor. He realised that the larger the group, the fiercer the attacks. The creatures were drawn to the magic.

      “Once he made this discovery, the expeditions became smaller and more successful. Mire continued to be the only one to emerge alive, but only because he was killing his colleagues to make sure they kept their mouths shut.

      “On his sixth journey into the caves, he found a vein of black crystals. He instructed one of his party to take a sample, but when the sorcerer laid one finger on an exposed crystal, he was consumed by what Mire described as ‘black lightning’ and turned to dust.”

      “Do you know where this vein was?”

      “There’s a map in the last of his journals, on one of the shelves in here. That’s the journal that prompted me to buy the house in the first place actually, so I could explore the caves for myself. I never got as far as the black crystals, mind you. Because I had no magic, I was largely ignored by the creatures, but even so, there were a few close calls that convinced me to leave the adventuring to the adventurers.”

      “That guy who tried to take a crystal was killed. How are we supposed to get one?”

      “That is where your Ancient heritage will come in useful. It was the Faceless Ones who mined the crystal in the first place, this is true, but the Ancients made themselves invisible to its senses and thus immune to its power.”

      “They weren’t immune. They used the Sceptre to kill each other.”

      “Ah, but that