Billie Jo. Kimberley Chambers

shortly start to fly. Lying on her bed, Billie picked up her book and hoped that the tears and the Patsy Cline CD wouldn’t ruin her evening.

      Cursing herself for having been caught, Chelle took a sip of wine and carefully replaced Terry’s clothes back into the wardrobe.

      Plonking her oversized body onto the bed, she felt like crying with frustration. Every drawer she’d inspected. Every pocket of clothing the bastard owned she’d searched and found precisely nothing.

      Well, she wasn’t about to give up. Late tonight, he said he’d be home and Chelle was determined to find some evidence and answers before the wanderer returned.

      Chelle was absolutely positive that he was up to no good. He was being too nice and when he didn’t look guilty, he had a stupid grin plastered across his smarmy face. Things would be so much easier if she didn’t still love him.

      Wiping a tear from her eye, she topped up her glass. There was no time for sentimentality. Pulling out the underwear drawer, she fiercely emptied it onto the floor. She had to find something, anything, and she had to do it today. Once his sordid secrets were uncovered, she could dismember his meat and two veg and have great pleasure in frying them up for breakfast.

      ‘Here we are, Tel. Pull up over there, on the drive.’

      Doing as he was told, Terry smiled at Jade. He was nervous, as he was about to meet her parents for the very first time. He felt like a bloody teenager all over again. It had been his idea that Jade return to Somerset for Christmas. He knew he’d be up to his neck with family stuff, and he couldn’t bear the thought of Jade being alone in the flat.

      Jade hadn’t seen her parents for over two years. They had never truly forgiven her for running off abroad and leaving them and her ex-boyfriend, Tommy, in no-man’s-land. Now that Jade was expecting their first grandchild, both parties had decided it was time to kiss and make up.

      ‘Oh, Jade. It’s so good to see you,’ Mary said, kissing her daughter and politely shaking hands with Terry.

      ‘Welcome to the family,’ Lenny muttered, whilst standing awkwardly behind his wife’s back.

      Two cups of tea, a piece of fruitcake and an interrogation worthy of the regional crime squad later, Terry couldn’t wait to bolt out of the door.

      ‘I best be making tracks, Jade,’ he said, standing up.

      ‘You can’t go yet,’ Mary said, thrusting a fresh cream scone towards him.

      ‘Jade tells us that you’ve been married once before, Terry?’ Lenny enquired nosily.

      ‘Yeah, I’m divorced,’ Terry lied, glancing at Jade.

      ‘May I ask how long you’ve been divorced?’ Mary pried.

      ‘Three years,’ Terry replied, with the first thing that came into his head. He could hardly tell them the poxy truth, could he?

      Tubbs and Crockett would love that, wouldn’t they, him announcing that he was still living with the wildebeest.

      Putting the half-eaten scone onto the plate, Terry stood up and grabbed his car keys.

      ‘It’s been lovely meeting you both. As much as I’d like to stay longer, I’m afraid I really have to go. My daughter that I spoke about, Billie Jo, is spending Christmas with me and I’ve promised to pick her up on the way home.’

      ‘It was very nice to meet you,’ Lenny and Mary replied in unison.

      Walking out to the car with him, Jade held his hand.

      ‘Well, that went well. It wasn’t too bad for you, was it?’

      ‘It was fine, babe,’ Terry said, pulling her into his arms. Moving in for a kiss, he decided against it. Tubbs and Crockett were peering out of the window.

      ‘I ain’t kissing you while they’re watching us.’

      Jade squeezed his hands and smiled.

      ‘They always used to watch me out of the window when I was a teenager, so don’t take it personally. You get going, Tel. Try and ring me over the holiday. I’ll leave my phone on day and night and whenever you get a chance, just ring.’

      ‘I will, babe. You’re welcome to ring me as well. Obviously, if I’m in the vicinity of the wildebeest, I’ll switch it off, but other than that, you can ring at your peril.’

      ‘I love you,’ Jade said, as he started the engine.

      Pressing the button to lower the window, Terry winked at her.

      ‘I love you too, babe. I love every bone in that beautiful body of yours. Keep your chin up, eh. Remember, this time next year, it’ll be me, you and the baby celebrating our first Christmas together.’

      Waving, Jade tearfully watched him drive away. She was going to miss him dreadfully and it was going to be her worst Christmas ever. Putting on a brave face, she went inside to rejoin her parents.

      Driving home, Terry mulled over the day’s events. Her parents had been friendly enough towards him, but they just weren’t his cup of tea. They were typical country folk and had reminded him of something from the TV programme The League of Gentlemen. He was half expecting them to look at him with a strange glint in their eye, while asking ‘Are you a local person?’ Terry drove out of Somerset, or Royston Vasey, as he’d nicknamed it, and headed back towards Essex as fast as the Range Rover would take him.

      After locking up the car lot on Christmas Eve, Terry went into the local pub where he’d arranged to meet Davey Mullins. They headed over to a quiet table in the corner and sat down.

      ‘What time shall we come over tomorrow, Tel?’

      ‘Come about one. Chelle’s meant to be cooking dinner, but I’ll have a hundred pounds that Mum and Bridie end up doing the honours. I reckon we’ll eat about three.’ Terry had been over the moon that Dave and Lisa had agreed to spend the day with them. Michelle had suggested the idea, as she’d struck up an unlikely friendship with Lisa, and Terry had eagerly agreed.

      ‘How have you and Chelle been getting on lately? Has she been performing at all?’

      Terry smiled at his friend. ‘She’s still drinking for England, but we’ve been getting on as well as can be expected. I try to be as nice to her as possible, just to keep the peace. I feel guilty sometimes, especially when she’s behaving herself. Can you imagine how she’d feel if she knew Jade was up the spout and I was fucking off and leaving her next year?’

      Dave took a sip of his Budweiser and laughed out loud. ‘She still ain’t got a clue what’s going on then?’

      ‘Not an inkling, Davey Boy, so for God’s sake don’t get pissed and put your foot in it tomorrow. You ain’t said nothing to Lisa, have you?’

      ‘You should know me better than that, mate. I would never tell a woman fuck all. All of ’em have a mouth like the Dartford Tunnel.’

      Laughing, Terry stood up.

      ‘I better make tracks. Me mother and Bridie have arrived and Chelle and Billie’ll be pulling their hair out, if I don’t get home soon.’

      ‘Laters, Tel.’

      ‘Hello, Mum, you all right, babe? Christ, you look well, Bridie. Been hitting that gym again, have ya?’

      Sipping her brandy, Bridie chuckled.

      ‘You’re a cheeky so-and-so, Terry Keane. Bejesus, do you never get weary of taking the piss out of people?’

      Laughing, Terry turned to his mother. ‘Have you had anything to eat yet?’

      ‘No, son, we’re fecking starving.’

      ‘Where’s your mother?’ Terry asked Billie.

      ‘In bed, feigning illness. Reckons she’s got the flu.’

      ‘More like alcoholic