Comedy of Marriage and Other Tales. Guy de Maupassant

scandal. You did not absolutely confess the existence of your mistresses, but you pleaded extenuating circumstances. You were very sarcastic upon the subject of those poor, silly women who object to their husbands being gallant toward other women, since, according to you, such gallantry is one of the laws of the polished society to which you belong. You laughed at the foolish man who does not dare to pay compliments to a woman in the presence of his own wife, and ridiculed the gloomy look of a wife whose eyes follow her husband into every corner, imagining that because the poor man disappears into an adjoining room he is at the feet of a rival. All this was very airy, funny, and disagreeable, wrapped up in compliments and spiced with cynicism—sweet and bitter at the same time, and calculated to banish from the heart all love for a smooth, false, and well-bred man who could talk in such a manner. I understood, I wept, I suffered, and then I shut my door upon you. You made no objection; you judged me better than you thought; and since then we have lived completely separate lives. Such has been the case for the past two years, two long years and more, which certainly have not seemed more than six months to you. We go into society as usual, we return from society as usual, and we each enter our own temple of life. The situation was established by you in consequence of your first infidelity, an infidelity which has been followed by many others. I have said nothing; I have resigned myself to the situation; and I have banished you from my heart. Now that I have finished, what do you wish?

      M. DE SALLUS

      My dear, I am not asking for anything. I do not even wish to answer the very aggressive speech you have done me the honor to make. I only wish to give you advice—the advice of a friend—upon a situation that may possibly endanger your reputation. You are beautiful, always in the public eye, and much envied. Scandal could have easy birth.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Pardon me. If we are to speak of scandal, I must have leave to balance my account with you.

      M. DE SALLUS

      Come, do not let us joke over this thing. I speak to you as a friend—seriously, as a friend. As to what you have said about me, it is all extremely exaggerated.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Not at all. You have never tried to conceal, in fact, you have actually proclaimed to all the world your infidelities—a fact which gives me the right to go and do likewise, and, my friend, believe what I say—

      M. DE SALLUS

      One moment—

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Let me finish. According to you, I am beautiful, I am young, and yet condemned by my husband to live, and watch him live, as if I were a widow. Look at me [rises], is it just to consign me to play the rôle of an abandoned Ariadne, while my husband runs from this woman to that woman, and this girl to that girl? [Grows excited.] A faithful wife! I cry you mercy! Is a faithful wife compelled to sacrifice all her life, all her happiness, all her affections, everything, in fact, every privilege, every expectation, every claim, which is hers by birth and for which she has been born? Look at me! Am I made for a nunnery? The fact that I married you should answer that question. And yet, you, you, who took me from my father's house, neglect me to run after others. And what others? I am not in their circle, neither am I one of those who would share your life with others. So much the worse for you—for I am free, and you have no right to give me advice since I am free.

      M. DE SALLUS

      My dear girl, be calm. You misunderstand me completely. I have never suspected you. Indeed, I have the most profound esteem and friendship for you—a loving friendship which grows greater every day. I have no wish to comment upon that past with which you reproach me so cruelly. Perhaps I am a little too—too—what shall I say?

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Oh! Say that you belong to the period of the Regency. I know that method of excusing all male weaknesses and follies. Oh! yes; that eighteenth century, that dainty century, so full of elegance, so full of delicious fantasies and adorable whims! Alas! my dear, that is ancient history.

      M. DE SALLUS

      No, no, you misunderstand me again. Believe me, I am and have been above everything too—too—much of a Parisian, too much accustomed to turning night into day, for the sedate life of marriage. I have been too much accustomed to go behind the scenes of theaters, to various clubs, to a thousand other forms of dissipation; and you know a man cannot change all at once—it takes time. Marriage seeks to change us all too suddenly. It ought to give us time to get accustomed to it, little by little. You would practically take away from me the joy of life were I to behave as you seem to desire.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      I am so grateful; and now, perhaps, you wish to offer me a new proof—a new proof—

      M. DE SALLUS

      Oh, as you please. Really, when a man who has lived as I have marries, he can hardly help looking upon his wife as a new mistress—I mean to say a faithful mistress—and it is only when it is too late that he understands more clearly—comes to his senses and repents.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Well, my friend, it is too late. As I have already told you, I mean to have my innings. I have taken nearly three years to think it over. You may think that is long, but I need some amusement as well as you. The fact that I have taken nearly three years to think it over is a compliment to you, but you fail to see it.

      M. DE SALLUS

      Madeline, this jesting is altogether out of place.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Oh! no, because I am compelled to think that every one of your mistresses was far more attractive than I, since you have preferred them to me.

      M. DE SALLUS

      What sort of mood are you in?

      MME. DE SALLUS

      In the same mood that I always am. It is you who have changed.

      M. DE SALLUS

      True, I have changed.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      And that is to say—

      M. DE SALLUS

      That I have been an idiot.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      And that—

      M. DE SALLUS

      I am sane once more.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      And that—

      M. DE SALLUS

      That I am again in love with my wife.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      You must have returned to your youth.

      M. DE SALLUS

      What do you say?

      MME. DE SALLUS

      I say that you must have returned to your youth.

      M. DE SALLUS

      What do you mean?

      MME. DE SALLUS

      Let me illustrate. When you are young you are always hungry, and when a youth is hungry he often eats things that he would not eat at another time. Well, I am the dish—the dish that you have neglected in your days of plenty, the dish to which you return in the days of scarcity—[slowly] for which I thank you!

      M. DE SALLUS

      I have never looked upon you as you think. You pain me as well as astonish me.

      MME. DE SALLUS

      So much the worse for both of us. If I astonish