Skulduggery Pleasant: Books 1 - 12. Derek Landy

he’d suddenly remembered he was in a conversation.

      “Of course,” he said quickly. “We are sorry we took up your time.”

      He hurried back to the Bentley, Valkyrie right behind him.

      “What’s wrong?” she asked.

      “I’ve figured it out,” he said as he walked. “It’s the Grotesquery.”

      “What is?”

      They reached the car and got in. Skulduggery turned the key and the engine roared to life.

      “The Isthmus Anchor is something that keeps the gateway between realities from sealing over,” he said. “It’s something that is here, but belongs over there. That’s why Batu had to wait fifty years between murders – he needed Baron Vengeous to bring the Grotesquery back. The Grotesquery is the Isthmus Anchor.”

      “But … Bliss cremated it. Right?”

      Skulduggery’s voice was hollow as they sped back to the road. “He burned what he could. He burned its limbs and most of its organs, everything about it that had been added from another creature. But the torso comes from an actual Faceless One, or at least the human vessel it was inhabiting, and they’re a lot harder to destroy.”

      Valkyrie was almost afraid to ask her next question. “So, like, where did he put it? Who has it? Skulduggery, who has the Grotesquery?”

      “It’s being kept at the Sanctuary,” Skulduggery said, something new in his voice. “Thurid Guild has the Isthmus Anchor.”

      

       atu took the vial in his right hand and carefully let the liquid drip on to the inside of his left forearm.

       The liquid burned like acid and carved its way through his skin, forming a symbol of blood and scorched flesh.

       When the symbol was complete, he put down the vial and examined his arm. The pain was excruciating.

       The Diablerie looked at him.

       “This will protect you,” he said. “When the Dark Gods come, this symbol will mark you out as a believer.”

       “And Sanguine?” asked Gruesome Krav. “Do we tell him about this mark?”

       “Sanguine is a mercenary. He has no faith, and as such, deserves no special treatment.”

       “Good,” Krav said. “I don’t like him.”

       Batu left the room as they began tattooing the symbol into their own arms, and went to the adjacent building to check on his army.

       He slid open the door and turned on the light. The rows of Hollow Men looked back at him, awaiting his orders.

       “Soon,” he promised.

      

      hey hurried up to the wax figure of Phil Lynott, standing there, holding its guitar with a frozen half-smile on its face.

      “We’re here to see Mr Bliss,” Skulduggery said.

      For a moment, nothing happened, and then the figure turned its head and looked at them. “Do you have an appointment?”

      “We don’t, but we need to see Bliss. It’s urgent.”

      “I’m afraid I have strict instructions regarding you and your partner. You are not to be allowed into the Sanctuary without—”

      “Call the Administrator,” Skulduggery interrupted. “Let me speak with somebody human.”

      “As you wish.” There was a pause. “The Administrator has been informed of your presence. Please wait here and she will be with you shortly.”

      They looked at the wall, waiting for it to open up. Skulduggery pressed the call button on his phone and listened for a few seconds, then shoved the phone back into his pocket without saying anything. He’d been trying to call Bliss for the last twenty minutes, but Bliss wasn’t answering.

      The wall rumbled and the hidden door opened. The Administrator stepped into the corridor.

      She smiled politely. “I’m afraid the Grand Mage is too busy to speak with anyone at the moment, but if you’d state your business—”

      “We’re not here for Guild,” Skulduggery said. “We’re here for Bliss.”

      “I’m sorry, Mr Pleasant, Elder Bliss is away.”

      “Away? Where?”

      “I’m afraid I can’t divulge that information.”

      “We don’t have time for this. The remains of the Grotesquery need to be moved now.”

      For the first time since Valkyrie had known her, the Administrator frowned. “How did you know about that? The removal of the Grotesquery is a classified operation, Mr Pleasant. Only two people in the Sanctuary are even aware of it.”

      “Those two people,” Skulduggery said, “that’s you and the Grand Mage? Why does he want to move it?”

      “We move items around all the time, for matters of storage, space or suitability. It’s nothing out of the ordinary.”

      “When is it being moved?”

      “I’m not—”

      “Where is it being moved to?”

      The Administrator bristled slightly. “I don’t know actually. The Grand Mage will instruct the transport team personally.”

      “How big a transport team?”

      “I’m not going to—”

      “Let me guess. Guild doesn’t want to attract attention, so it will be low-key. Two or three Cleavers, is that it? In an armoured van?”

      “The Grand Mage assures me it will be perfectly adequate.”

      “The van’s going to be attacked,” Valkyrie said.

      The Administrator’s eyes narrowed. “Why would you do that?”

      “We’re not going to attack the van,” Skulduggery told her. “But we are going to have to steal the Grotesquery.”

      There was a pause and then the Administrator turned to run. Skulduggery held up a hand. Valkyrie felt the faint ripples as a bubble formed around the Administrator’s head, robbing her of oxygen. She gasped for a breath that wouldn’t come and Skulduggery caught her as she staggered.

      “I’m very sorry,” he murmured.

      Valkyrie clicked her fingers and whirled to the figure of Phil Lynott, holding a fireball close to his wax face.

      “If you sound the alarm,” she warned, “I’ll melt you.”

      “No need,” the wax figure said. “My communications link is to the Administrator only. They keep promising to extend my link to the entire Sanctuary, but they haven’t.