Not pregnant yet? You bet!. Rimma Efimkina

Embryo specialist said not to give it much hope.

      But Angela came with a different problem. She was highly impressed by a handsome doctor who performed the IVF. When he had his job done, he said: “You’ll spend this night with me”. The ambiguity of his words and his tone caused confusion in her mind.

      – Can you imagine? He didn’t say “You will stay in the hospital till tomorrow”, he said “You’ll spend this night with me”! – told Angela excitedly. – If he only asked me, if he only gave me a hint, I would have given it to him without giving it much thought!

      Angela looks in front of her as if not seeing anything, rubs her temples and says frustrated:

      – But I’m happily married, my husband is such a nice guy, we are so close! Can you explain what is the deal with this obsession?

      I have thought about this frequently, as a matter of fact. I mean, about in vitro fertilization. The process that is deeply personal, spiritual and sexual that joins two people as one and makes them parents, becomes distant and impersonal inside a hospital. There is no passion-charged field necessary to conceive new life in the mechanical procedure.

      Is it possible that the feelings Angela told me about are normal in an un-normal situation? And she tries to compensate it with her behavior? I don’t know the answer, but nothing prevents me from assuming it. The man who fertilized the egg and put the embryo in is a part of the sacrament now. He becomes very close, but he is still a stranger. How a woman is supposed to overcome this estrangement and resolve the conflict between the two roles he performs: a doctor and a participant of bringing new life into this world? Unconsciously Angela found a way: to fall in love with him to humanize the process of in vitro fertilization.

      I totally agree with Jeremy Taylor when he says that each of us is born as a result of a sexual contact, so in this sense sexuality deeply resonates with religious and philosophical problems. So, modern procedures, such as artificial insemination, amniocentesis31, ability to determine the sex of a baby and possible abnormalities, in vitro fertilization, complicated devices for maintaining life that allow to “give birth to an embryo” without growing it in mother’s uterus, have created moral dilemmas that can’t be solved, unless the un-measurable elements of human life are considered as real and important as the devices that make these procedures possible32.

      If two people are bound by love and respect for each other, this does good to the future baby, so nothing is impossible.

      Chapter 4

      Saving oneself is one’s own business

      Responsibility and conception

      I won’t play coy and say I’m clever.

      I haven’t created anything ever.

      My inventions haven’t won any gold,

      But just “cause I was busy and had a cold.

Internet meme by Better-days

      I want to scream out loud: always take responsibility when you have an opportunity to do so! I would put it even more strictly: always take responsibility, create this opportunity for yourself. Responsibility is your power to rule over your life. Sometimes people think that responsibility is a heavy unbearable load that is better to be passed on to somebody else. But when we give up the responsibility, we give up the power.

      I pretty much copied the paragraph above from my other book on financial success. If you want to have a lot of money, take the responsibility. This principal might be even more important in case of medical interventions, because it’s about your health and your life. Robert Menleshon states that doctors’ strategy is to “blame it on the victim”, to disguise most of their sins, including forcing on the medication, hysterectomy and cesarean that their patients didn’t need and that were not necessary. He thinks that a woman who wishes to be healthy should learn how to shield herself against dangerous and unnecessary medicines. Don’t wait that a doctor does it for you. Ask to give instruction to each medicine. Pay special attention to warnings and side effects. If you don’t like want you see, make your doctor prove his point of view. If he is unable or unwilling to do so, maybe it’s time to discuss it with somebody else33

      Примечания

      1

      Laparoscopic ovarian wedge resection is a surgical technique performed to reduce the amount of androgen producing tissue in women with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS). It is used to improve the effectiveness of other ovulation induction treatments. The surgery involves a cut of the ovary tissue in the form of a wedge. It raises a chance of pregnancy in many women (70—80%).

      2

      http://mosclinic.ru/articles/zoom/7840

      3

      Harry van der Zee, Homeopathy For Birth Trauma.

      4

      Robert Mendelsohn, Confessions Of A Medical Heretic.

      5

      Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Women Who Run With The Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype.

      6

      Carl Jung, Modern Man In Search Of A Soul.

      7

      Cited from Robert Frager, James Fadiman, Personality & Personal Growth.

      8

      Ruediger Dahlke, The Healing Power of Illness: Understanding What Symptoms Are Telling You.

      9

      http://www.babyblog.ru/community/post/sterility/410091

      10

      Insemination is the deliberate introduction of sperm into a female animal or plant for the purpose of impregnating or fertilizing the female for sexual reproduction.

      11

      Laparoscopy, see above.

      12

      Hysterosalpingography (HSG), also known as uterosalpingography, is a radiologic procedure to investigate the shape of the uterine cavity and the shape

31

Amniocentesis (also referred to as amniotic fluid test) is a medical procedure used in prenatal diagnosis of chromosomal abnormalities and fetal infections, and also for sex determination, in which a small amount of amniotic fluid, which contains fetal tissues, is sampled from the amniotic sac surrounding a developing fetus, and then the fetal DNA is examined for genetic abnormalities.

32

Jeremy Taylor, The Wisdom of Your Dreams: Using Dreams to Tap into Your Unconscious and Transform Your Life.

33

Robert Mendelsohn, Mal (e) function: How Doctors Manipulate Women.