Raising Able. Susan Tordella

are eager, open and confident towards developing new skills. Encourage them by acknowledging their efforts and letting them stretch to do complex tasks.

      Parents do the chores with child until they can do them independently, with prompting. These are the peak years to embed a work ethic.

      Empty the whole dishwasher, sweep the kitchen, and set the table.

      Make their own lunches and snacks for school.

      Take responsibility for homework.

      Help do laundry.

      Clean up the kitchen after dinner on a team, load the dishwasher, wipe the table, sweep the floor, take out the trash and wash dishes.

      Clean a powder room and a part of a bathroom or kitchen.

      Pet care.

      Stack and move firewood, pick up kindling, shovel snow.

      Vacuum and dust a room.

      Rake leaves, water plants, wash windows, garden with others.

      Perform simple sewing projects and mending.

      Take responsibility for their room.

      Assist with simple house painting projects.

      Middle school, 12-13 years old.

      Tweens gain capability. After a brief training, they are able to work independently. Tasks are more enjoyable when done as a family. Their skill level is rapidly expanding.

      Do their laundry. Able to do family laundry.

      Clean the kitchen after dinner, including scrubbing pots and pans, cleaning stove and sweeping the floor.

      Cook simple meals, take responsibility for an aspect of dinner.

      Mow the lawn, shovel snow and rake leaves

      Repair and maintain computers, bikes and skateboards with help.

      Chop and stack wood, start fires in woodstove with supervision.

      Babysit family members and neighbors. Pet care.

      Clean a full bathroom.

      Assist in painting a room, perform light household maintenance.

      Work on a team to wash windows, clean a garage or basement, and clean out the fridge.

      Do complex sewing and construction projects with assistance.

      Work as apprentice for a family business -- for pay.

      Keep their bedroom as they choose.

      High School, 14-18 years old

      Build on their belief they have equal knowledge and ability with parents. Encourage them by getting out of their way and minimize criticism.

      Independently perform any of the tasks above.

      Teach younger siblings to learn any of the above tasks.

      Clean a garage, car, kitchen, fridge, living room, or bedroom.

      Go grocery shopping, prepare meals.

      Drive siblings and pets places, run errands for parents.

      Do complex construction and sewing projects independently.

      Do yard work including lawn mowing and snow blowing.

      Build fires in woodstove, split wood, and use chainsaw with training.

      Learn house and car maintenance, such as how to fix a broken window and change the oil on a vehicle.

      Be on the payroll for a family business.

      College students and beyond, 18 years old and up.

      Make adult-level contributions daily when home. Take on regular responsibility during long stays.

      Expect them leave their room clean before they leave for months. Communicate in advance and plan to assist, if necessary.

      Cheerfully pull their weight and volunteer to help out.