Expectation Hangover. Christine Hassler

Numbing the Pain

Being Strong

Pep Talks

The Next Best Thing

Spiritual Bypass

Chapter Four: Awareness and Acceptance

The First Step out of Disappointment

PART TWO: TREATMENT PLAN

Chapter Five: A Holistic Prescription for Treating Your Expectation Hangover

Role-Playing Rx

Chapter Six: The Emotional Level

How We Suppress Emotions

Role-Playing Rx: The Surfer

       But I’m Not Angry!

       The Power of Vulnerability

       Make a Date with Your Feelings

       Conclusion

       Chapter Seven: The Mental Level

       Your Story

       Role-Playing Rx: The Horseback Rider

       Thought Time Travel

       Conclusion

       Chapter Eight: The Behavioral Level

       Role-Playing Rx: The Scientist

       Compensatory Strategies

       Your Superpowers

       Avoidance Traps

       Your Core Values

       Conclusion

       Chapter Nine: The Spiritual Level

       The Goal Line versus the Soul Line

       Your Spiritual Curriculum

       Role-Playing Rx: The Seeker

       Living Inside Out

       Surrendering to a Higher Power

       Lesson Quest

       Your Life Purpose

       Conclusion

       PART THREE: PREVENTION

       Chapter Ten: Managing Your Expectations

       The Secret Sauce for Pursuing Goals

       Chapter Eleven: Quick Fixes That Work

       Quick Fix 1: Stop People-Pleasing

       Quick Fix 2: Go Your Own Way

       Quick Fix 3: Don’t Go to a Chinese Restaurant for Nachos

       Quick Fix 4: Wake Up from Comparison Comas

       Quick Fix 5: Be of Service

       Quick Fix 6: Be a Kid

       Quick Fix 7: Gorge on Gratitude

       Conclusion

       Acknowledgments

       Notes

       Index

       About the Author

FOREWORD

      I’m sure my loving parents meant well when they raised me to believe the world was my oyster. As the oldest child doted on by adoring parents, I grew up thinking the world would treat me as lovingly as my parents did, so imagine my surprise when I wound up in medical school, where I felt judged and criticized by my professors, who were regularly scolding me for my stupidity and incompetence. I also figured all men would treat me like the princess my father had led me to believe I was, so imagine my confusion and hurt when I wound up in a marriage with a man who didn’t dote on me like my parents did.

      By the time I was thirty-three years old, I was very successful in my career as a doctor, but I was twice divorced, professionally disillusioned, and taking seven medications for a host of health conditions my doctors led me to believe were incurable. Saddled with a serious case of entitlement, I felt like the Universe had let me down. By the time I was thirty-six, I wound up with one dark night of the soul after another that culminated in a massive Expectation Hangover when the compounding losses left me humbled, emotionally paralyzed, and on my knees.

      I thought I might find relief by quitting my job as a physician, selling my oceanfront house, and moving to the country, where I planned to launch my new career as a writer by penning my first masterpiece. But things didn’t go as I planned, and by forty-one, I found myself $200,000 in debt, with no agent, no publisher, and a third failing marriage. My life had strayed so far from the fairy-tale life I had expected that I barely recognized it. Where had I gone wrong? My self-esteem took a major hit, and the shell of my ego started to crack. What I hadn’t anticipated was that underneath that shell, the real gold had been buried all along.

      I had to mine the gold from my Expectation Hangover one teensy nugget at a time before my life started to turn around. The process was slow, painful, and filled with self-judgment, disillusionment, frustration, roadblocks, and tests of my faith. Because my journey eventually yielded a great deal of personal, spiritual, and professional satisfaction, I can’t regret a second of it, but I can say that I wish I had been blessed with Christine Hassler’s book back when all this was happening. It might have saved me years of unnecessary suffering!

      If this book has landed in your lap right now, and you’re wallowing in an Expectation Hangover of your own, consider it a sign from the Universe that you’re ready to press “fast-forward” on this phase of your journey. With this book, you will be guided through your Expectation Hangover with love, compassion, and sensitivity to how much you might be hurting right now. Nobody is going to expect you (or allow you) to skip your painful emotions with a “spiritual bypass.” But by the time you reach the end of this book, you will have been given all the tools you need to mine the gold from your disappointment, as long as you’re ready to face the honest truth about yourself and about what your soul may be here on this earth to learn.

      After gleaning the gems from your Expectation Hangover, you’ll not only heal from your disappointment but learn how to prevent future disappointment. You’ll be inspired to live your life in a whole new way, and you’ll become much more open to whatever smorgasbord of life experiences the Universe dishes up, rather than getting upset when you don’t immediately get what you ordered off life’s menu.

      This book is your road map to navigate any disappointment you may be experiencing. I promise you that you are being called to participate in this adventure, and your mission, should you choose to accept it, will be more