African Friends and Money Matters, Second Edition. David E. Maranz

how it gives them pleasure. Maybe a little pop psychology can be enlightening. The Westerner thinks paying someone to praise you cannot involve sincerity. Perhaps to the African, the praise singer is actually giving the truth in expressing the fine qualities of the person that ordinarily go unrecognized. Church offerings provide a good example:

      Most African societies expect the wealthy to contribute generously, both to the church and to the public benefit at celebrations. An usher may break into praise when a wealthy person contributes a large sum, a wealthy person may dance joyously down the isle waving a large bill in the air, or a pastor may encourage an expatriate or an elite member to give generously, much to the astonishment of a Westerner, who has been taught, “Don’t let your right hand know what your left hand is doing.” However, as long as they are humble, local Christians are encouraged by such displays of generosity, and will doubtless break into celebration (personal communication, 2014 ).

Formality

      It is not bad to love the king, but it is even better to be loved by the king.

Wolof proverb (Senegal)15

      15 Shawyer 2009:404.

      African society tends to be formal in many everyday environments. For Americans and probably to a lesser degree for other Westerners, it is important to recognize this. If Americans are not aware of the formalities expected in many situations, they risk embarrassing their African counterparts and other Westerners who are tuned in to the formal requirements of the moment. Formality can be expressed in several ways. Terms and mode of address, posture, gestures, dress, and attitude, are a few of the elements involved.

      In practical terms, when in new social situations, it is best to use people’s last names and titles, including academic titles, until there is indication from Africans that the foreigner should be less formal. When in doubt it is better to err on the side of formality. The higher value to keep in mind is showing respect and refraining from doing or saying anything that will be interpreted as disrespectful. This is important for building and maintaining healthy relationships with others. This is good advice especially if the foreigner is young.

People are respected because of their age, experience, wealth and/or position. Older people are viewed as wise and are granted respect. In a group one can always see preferential treatment for the eldest member present. With respect comes responsibility and people expect the most senior person to make decisions that are in the best interest of the group.16

      16 www.kwintessential.co.uk

      In French-speaking regions it is best to avoid the familiar pronouns, like tu, until rapport is established and the African begins to use them with the expat. Even then, if the African person is older, it is often good to ask how they prefer to be addressed. Because Americans value equality, perhaps as a reaction to the English class system under which they were poorly treated, they tend to be quick to address people by their first names. They should be very careful to not do this without assurance it is acceptable to people.

Each group has its own way of honoring the hierarchies, establishing respect and deference, and following (or not following) through on their responsibilities. There are formal ways that guests (outsiders) and hosts (insiders) must act toward one another, in order to preserve the honor of all groups and individuals.17

      17 Foster 2002:203.

      There are, of course, times when informality is called for. The foreigner needs to distinguish between leisurely talking and being formal. A general rule is that personal conversation may be informal but group meetings are formal.

      Formality is an especially important concern when the expatriate is meeting and interacting with persons of rank, such as government and business officials. They need to be treated with the respect and protocol due to them because of their positions. Familiarity should be avoided. Appropriate dress needs to be worn to show respect. In all these matters Westerners should inform themselves ahead of time as to the requirements that are mandated by local custom.

      Names and titles

      A goat’s head is not lost in the soup.

Ibibio proverb (Nigeria)18

      18 Clasberry 2010:127.

      As is probably true worldwide, names are important in Africa. Local usage varies, but there are elements that are common to all or most of Africa. In most countries, titles are important and are used when addressing the individual. When the family is discussed, kinship terms are used. Whatever the local usages are regarding name, titles, family and kinship, and various honorifics, they should be taken as matters of importance to the people involved.

      In some African cultures names have special meaning and significance. They are not chosen at random or picked out from a published list of possibilities. In most Western countries names are used to individuate children, giving them personal identities. While names are used to individuate children in African societies as well, the identity of a person is centered more in their wider context of relatedness, their lineage, their clan or tribal identity, or their religious heritage, rather than their individuality. Boys in Muslim families are named using one of many variants of Muhammad, or for other Muslim personages of note, while girls are more likely to be given names which sound pretty, or are associated with highly valued virtues or characteristics, much like the “Christian virtue” names Westerners give. Roman Catholics often name children, both boys and girls, after a saint. However, many Africans have multiple names, but lack an apparent “surname.” People in Christianized or Islamized societies frequently carry at least two names, a name that associates them with their parents’ religion, and a vernacular name that associates them with their lineage, an historic event, or a social, historic event or circumstance surrounding their birth. Many people, especially men, also carry nicknames, by which most villagers know them, but which they prefer not to be introduced by formally. Knowing which name to use in which context can be a matter of showing respect.

Some names relate to the kinship group and so serve to identify more than just the individual. Sometimes they relate to events surrounding the child’s birth. An example from Kenya shows just how important an individual’s name may be, and therefore, how important it may be to take a person’s name seriously. Under certain circumstances where the newborn is believed to be at risk, it is intentionally “lost,” and then ritually “found.” Upon being thus “found,” the child will be named after the container in which it was ritually abandoned. It may be called Atonga (basket), Odheru (tray made of straw), or Adita (small basket). The child may also be named after the person who “discovered” it on the path.19

      19 Owin 1995:4–5.

      A number of societies give “commentary names” through which people voice their opinion, or the way they experienced an event, or problem, even a family dispute. This should not be interpreted as “airing dirty laundry,” for even once the problem is resolved, it serves to correct bad behavior and instruct people on proper interpersonal relationships. They welcome visitors to ask about the specifics, for through such names one can learn a great deal about a person’s, or a family’s, internal dynamics.

      Other societies name children for living or deceased relatives, give them names that correspond to colors of cattle, anomalies of birth (breech, covered, wrapped cord, etc), omens, deities that a parent prayed to for a child, or answers to prayer. New names may be given at certain junctures, like initiation, circumcision, birth of a child, death of a parent, etc. It is important to understand the social meaning these names carry, the way they integrate