Time & Money. Sonja Becker

the larger pattern. Unexpected events will seem to answer the question that your mind couldn’t resolve. You will feel more alive and your view of your life will be larger.

      Teachers and coaches tell us to focus on one thing, and most people interpret that to mean one piece of the puzzle. True focus creates a larger perspective by organizing all the activities that go into a great life. Your new perceptions approximate reality more closely because they don’t exclude essential parts of your nature.

      When you were born your life was a puzzle. However, there was no picture on the box to help you assemble the pieces. Because we evolved from hunters and gatherers, we instinctively focus on the objects and movement. For eons our survival depended on noticing the movement of other bodies as distinct from the background. That familiar way of thinking limited our options. Traditional learning reinforces that fragmented thinking by interpreting every event we encounter as a potential threat.

      Once mankind fulfilled some basic survival needs, a few people began to look at life from a larger perspective. They began to notice how events were connected. That kind of thinking is called systems thinking. When you let go of your fixation on objects and begin to notice how events are connected, you have more options to respond to those events. You can adapt better.

      If we ask someone to describe something that occurred in their company, they respond with a generalization. “Janis did a good job.” If we ask them to clarify, they make a more specific generalization. “Janis really gave her best effort.” These concepts can’t be verified, so arguments ensue. People work at cross purposes. Vitality decreases. Their lights go out as they struggle to prove they are right and others are wrong.

      Systematic thinking focuses attention precisely on the event. “Janis removed the vase from the table.” That statement is an accurate description, which helps other people notice what they did in relation to Janis’s action. “She handed me the vase and I put it in the sink.” Suddenly people are speaking the language of events. Their conversations reflect actual reality rather than conceptual reality. Instead of trading opinions, their words begin to reflect actual occurrences. They have common ground, which enables them to coordinate their actions better. Vitality increases. They light up.

      Group thinking is what happens when people share conceptual realities. Concepts can be perfectly true, but they can also be perfectly boring. People argue familiar points and disagree on how to proceed. Opinions proliferate. Projects bog down. Thoughts and feelings flare up in response to separate interpretations.

      Systemic thinking is thinking together as a network. Instead of interpretations, people communicate with descriptions of events. The accuracy of their observations enables them to play off each other. As the pace picks up they begin to get results at a faster pace. Their language brings attention to outcomes that are self-evident. Their descriptions can quickly be verified and the team can see the next step. Aliveness increases as everyone is caught up in the pleasure of achievement. Individuality disappears as the connections between their activities become clearer. When change comes they can adapt to real events, while others continue to gaze at their mental models.

      Systemic thinking doesn’t eliminate ordinary thinking. In fact, you must persist in generalizing and in fulfilling your ego desires until they combine and merge with your actions. Systems expand your options by giving you an additional way to look at things. By adding another way to relate to events, you enrich your interpretation. Eventually your ideas begin to integrate with actual events. Through trial and error you awaken your senses and harness the energy that comes from vivid perceptions.

      Action brings the conceptual and actual worlds into alignment. Go for what you want. When you fulfill a false desire, you get past it. You begin to notice the vitality that happens through your connection to other people. When you communicate through action, you create a natural attraction for the things that truly matter in life. You move and speak with the confidence of someone who won’t be denied. Your projects are magnetic and other people feel included. Money and pleasure come easily because you exude a strong yet gentle approach to life. Depriving yourself of legitimate desires destroys your motivation and only leads to burn out.

      Once you know what lights you up, you must consider the second question: are those activities feasible? Can you assemble all of the things you enjoy into a workable business design? Do they add up to a service or product that works in the real world and under actual market conditions?

      There are some simple reality tests that will help you answer these questions. Has anyone ever succeeded in doing the thing that interests you? Do you have talent in this arena? Do the activities you enjoy work within the laws of nature? Do they lend themselves to use by others who would pay to participate in them? Could you do those things for many years without burning out? Do listeners light up when you describe the activities you want to do for a living?

      Look beyond the glamorous pictures in your mind to grasp the reality of your dream before you pursue it. Someone who wants to own a horse ranch, for example, should first spend some time cleaning stables. Actually, owning a ranch is nothing like Bonanza. Real ranching is sustained drudgery; lugging heavy tools, and completing earthy jobs. If you don’t resonate to that work, a horse ranch would just steal away your attention from the things you really enjoy.

      On the other hand, don’t feel limited by obstacles that exist only in your mind. To find your core activities you have to try a lot of different things. Work on a ranch. Play in a band. Fly a plane. Try out all of the different things that you’ve ever wondered about.

      Even if you think you are too young, or too old, or too ordinary, take some chances. It’s never too early to begin. It’s never too late, either. Beware self-doubt. Don’t accept disappointing verdicts from well-meaning friends. Einstein was considered simpleminded by his schoolmaster, yet, he learned the fundamentals of science, and then carried the entire field into a new dimension. The schoolmaster, on the other hand, is remembered only as a nuisance.

      Some famous pop singers can barely carry a tune. It’s their flair that propels them to the top of the charts. Recognizing your limitations can help you rise above them. Those very limitations are often only one aspect of your unique intelligence. Many active children, for instance, are diagnosed as hyperactive, but in reality they are just high energy people. The wildest colts make the best horses.

      WHAT IS YOUR DESIRE?

      So, what do you want? Contemplate the things that make you happy. After you run through your habitually recurrent list, consider the question again. What do you really want? What one word would you use to express the core of your desire? What makes life worthwhile for you?

      We earn our living interviewing people and giving them feedback on the things that light them up. Surprisingly, no one ever brightened up on pursuing anything lofty, significant, or spiritual. Everyone wants to light up on noble endeavors, but our roots lie in something more basic. In our experience, most people come alive around action and the toys that move them to action

      Peak experiences and spiritual insights are considered sacred. We believe that material things are sacred, too. When you buy something you want, your purchase feeds and clothes the entire network of people who designed, and built, and sold that product.

      Playful action is both material and spiritual at the same time. People genuinely delight in sports and recreation. Humans were made to play. Just about everybody we have ever worked with lit up when performing or making people laugh.

      The thing you enjoy above all others is what makes you interesting and desirable. When you discover your function, your mind and body reorganize around it. That's why engineers often look like engineers, and lawyers often look like lawyers. Athletes look athletic, artists look artistic, and musicians look, well, musical. What you do for a living determines largely how you view life and the kind of person you become. People who work in cubicles begin to think inside the box. Those who serve people become more sociable. By making the right career choice for your particular nature and style, you are choosing the path of growth and fulfillment.

      Your career shapes your body, facial structure, health, social life, tastes, and just about everything else that relates to the quality of your overall experience. If you