The It Girl: Don't Tell the Bridesmaid. Katy Birchall

her head at him in disappointment.

      ‘Well, if you’re going to insist on following rules,’ Helena said authoritatively, rolling up the sleeves of her kimono, ‘let them at least be good ones.’

      Helena Montaine’s top five rules for making the most of a new city:

      1. Don’t be afraid to say ‘yes’ to new things, such as local delicacies and traditions.

      ‘I don’t think I’d have had half as much fun on that film set in Dubai if I’d said no to riding that ridiculous creature, the camel. At first I didn’t have the slightest interest, but I very much bonded with Ibil in the end. When he stopped spitting, of course.’

      2. Speak to the locals.

      ‘This is an absolute necessity when visiting a new place because they will be able to point you in the direction of the cleanest lavatory facilities in the area. Indispensable knowledge.’

      3. Make sure that you visit at least one historic landmark early on in the trip so you can get a photo of yourself next to it.

      ‘Then if you just happen to wander into a luxurious spa and end up staying there for a few days, no one can accuse you of missing out on the terribly important culture of wherever you are because you have photographic evidence.’

      4. Be sure to learn at least one essential phrase that you will be using often in the local language of where you are holidaying.

      ‘For Italy I recommend attenzione con la mia casella di cappello, which means “careful with my hat box”.’

      5. Make your own rules.

      ‘It is YOUR holiday and you are making YOUR memories. Make sure they are good ones. And by that I mean fun ones.’

      I laughed nervously as I think I caught Connor frowning slightly at that last one.

      ‘Helena’s right,’ my mum insisted. ‘This is Anna’s first big adventure. She should make the most of it.’

      ‘Speaking of adventures,’ Marianne began, ‘I actually have my own adventure to tell you about. I’m moving.’ She beamed. ‘Tom and I have decided to move in together.’

      I sat in shock. Marianne hadn’t mentioned anything about this to me – I didn’t even realise they’d talked about things like that. Judging by the expression on Helena’s face, she hadn’t mentioned it to her mother either.

      ‘I know it’s quite fast, but we’re totally committed and we’ve talked it through extensively. We’re both really excited and now seems like a good time. He’ll be on tour for the next couple of months so I’m going to be looking for the perfect place and then when he gets back we’ll move in.’

      ‘Well,’ Mum smiled, taking charge as Helena looked completely gobsmacked. ‘Congratulations, Marianne, that’s very exciting.’

      ‘Yes,’ Helena agreed, pulling herself together. ‘It does all seem quite fast but then I’m one to talk. You have to do what makes you happy.’ She turned to Dad who smiled back at her in a goofy way, reaching over to link his fingers with hers before kissing her hand.

      I mean, I know it’s cute that they’re so in love and blah blah blah, but do they need to do this kind of thing in front of ME?

      I couldn’t even look at Connor at this point. But he reached over and gave my hand a reassuring squeeze. I blushed and looked at my feet.

      ‘Tom makes me happy. The happiest ever,’ Marianne gushed, her cheeks flushing pink.

      ‘Well then –’ Helena raised her glass – ‘how exciting. Congratulations, Marianne.’

      ‘My goodness, what a summer!’ My mum laughed. ‘Here’s to the wedding, Connor’s comic book, Marianne’s new place and Anna’s Roman adventure!’

      As everyone stretched over to clink glasses, Marianne leaned gently towards me so that our shoulders were touching.

      ‘And,’ she whispered in my ear so that no one else could hear, ‘here’s to making your own rules.’

      The whole of the next morning I tried to act like it was just a normal day in front of Dog. He sat next to me while I brushed my teeth as he always did, and I could see him eyeing me suspiciously as I put my toothbrush in a washbag and not into its normal mug. Then I saw him look mildly puzzled as I went around the house picking up everyday items such as my phone charger and my shampoo and taking them upstairs to my room, then shutting the door.

      ‘Anna!’ my dad yelled up the stairs. ‘You’re going to be late! Rebecca, Helena and Marianne will be here any minute. We’ve got to get everything packed up and ready!’

      ‘What’s Dog doing?’ I shouted back through my door.

      ‘What?’

      ‘I said, what is Dog doing?’ I carefully opened my door so I could peer out through the crack.

      ‘I don’t know, Anna,’ Dad said, exasperated. ‘I think he’s chewing on the Monopoly board in the sitting room. I’ve told you not to leave board games within his reach. Don’t you remember the incident with Snakes and Ladders?’

      ‘So, he’s distracted?’

      ‘Yes. He’s not passed Go yet.’ Dad laughed VERY loudly at his own joke.

      ‘Dad, I’m being serious! I need to know the coast is clear for me to bring my suitcase down.’

      ‘For goodness’ sake, Anna, just bring it down. Do you want me to come and help you with it?’

      ‘No! No, stay downstairs. If you come up here, he might know something is up. Act as normal as possible. Grab some paper and moan about deadlines or say something boring about the war like normal.’ I heard Dad mumble something about ungrateful teenagers as I opened my door wide enough for me to squeeze through with my suitcase. ‘Is the front door open?’

      ‘Yes.’

      ‘Is the boot open?’

      ‘Yes!’

      ‘OK, well, make sure you leave my pathway clear. I’m going to run down with the suitcase and quickly out the door, before throwing it in the boot without Dog seeing a thing. If Dog approaches, you need to alert me and I’ll run back up and hide the suitcase.’

      ‘Alert you?’

      ‘Yes. Secret code. Do a squawk or something.’

      ‘A squawk ? Anna, what are you talking about?’

      I sighed at how slow he was being when we were already pressed for time. ‘That’s code for “Dog is on the move”.’

      ‘Or I could just say, Dog is on the move. You know, because he’s a dog and he doesn’t understand human speak?’ Dad huffed.

      ‘Yeah, that’s what you think. I know better. Is the coast clear? Maybe I should hunt out my walkie-talkies. They might be helpful.’

      ‘Anna, just come down the stairs and put your suitcase in the car before I lose my temper.’

      ‘FINE. But if Dog sees the suitcase and goes mad because he knows that I’m leaving him, you can’t blame ME for anything that gets broken when he punishes me.’

      ‘Anna –’

      I quietly tiptoed out of my room with my suitcase in tow and began a very slow, careful descent down the stairs with Dad standing at the bottom watching me, his arms crossed. The suitcase was much heavier than I was expecting even though I’d already had to cut down half of what I wanted to bring due to weight restrictions. I could