My Only Desire. Adrianne Byrd

creeping up on her, but she told herself that if she could just get outside for some fresh air that she’d feel better.

       Shove. Push. Shove. Push.

      The door still seemed so far away. Stay calm. Keep it together.

       Shove. Push. Shove. Push.

      Another sob bubbled up. Finally she stormed out of the house and sucked in a healthy dose of the night’s crisp, fresh air. The wind blew across her wet face and cooled her down a couple of degrees. She exhaled and from the corner of her eyes, she caught a few curious stares. Pull yourself together. Anna mopped her face dry and then started down the front stairs.

      “Yo, Anna. Where are you going?”

      Anna glanced up and saw a small ring of girlfriends jog up the stairs.

      “Don’t tell me that the party is whack,” Emmadonna said, settling a hand on her thick hips. “You know how long it took me to get ready for this mess?”

      “Three hours,” Ivy chirped, irritated. “Not to mention you used up all my hair gel—again.”

      Emmadonna’s neck swiveled. “Damn. I said I’d buy you another jar. You’re the one who wanted me to come to this party and you know I couldn’t come without getting my finger-wave in tight. Shoot.” She patted her rock-hard hair. “I came to get a man tonight.”

      As usual Emmadonna’s sister-girl act put an immediate smile on Anna’s face.

      “You’re always looking for a man,” Anna reminded her.

      “You can’t find what you don’t look for. Ain’t that right, Ivy?”

      “Whatever.” Anna shrugged her shoulders.

      Emmadonna swiveled her neck and jabbed her other hand onto her hip. “Soooo … did you do it—or did you chicken out? Don’t tell me that you chickened out with Charlie tonight.”

      Anna’s jaw clenched.

      “You did, didn’t you?” Emmadonna rolled her eyes. “Girl, what am I going to do with you? How are you going to get out of this friend zone if you don’t tell Charlie that you’re feeling him?”

      “Look, Em—”

      “No. You look.” Emmadonna swung her heavy arm around Anna’s shoulders and started to lead her back toward the frat house. “That boy is waaay too fine to just keep on your friend list. I know you’re feeling him and I seen him look at you.”

      “He looks at everything with two legs and two breasts,” Anna muttered dejectedly.

      “Well, there you go! You’re his type.” Emmadonna laughed. “Now get your butt on in here and—”

      Anna dug in her heels and shook her head. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. I was leaving.”

      “Leaving?”

      “It’s just ten-thirty.”

      “I know. I just … have a lot I … um—”

      Emmadonna wasn’t trying to hear it. “Girl, if you don’t get your butt in here …”

      Anna wrenched herself from Emmadonna’s hold. “No. I said I’m going home.”

      Emmadonna gave chase, surprising Anna with her speed and agility when she snatched her by her arm at the bottom of the stairs. “Whoa. What the hell? What happened in there?”

      “Nothing,” Anna lied. Unfortunately, Emmadonna wasn’t buying it.

      “Something gotta be wrong with you running out of here with your tail tucked in between your legs. Now spit it out.”

      More partiers arrived and tried to squeeze their way past the girls. Impatient, Emmadonna tightened her hold on Anna’s wrist and then tugged her off to the side. “C’mon, now. We’ve been best friends for forever. I know you better than you know yourself. What happened?”

      At that moment the dam broke. Tears tripped over Anna’s lashes and then streaked down her face at a pace that startled her friends.

      “Oh, my God. He turned you down,” Emmadonna concluded and then pulled Anna into her strong arms for a smothering hug. “I’m so sorry.”

      Anna’s eyes bugged as she struggled to get air into her lungs. When it was clear that was nearing on being impossible, she started whacking her friend on the back in hopes that Emmadonna would catch a clue and release her. She did. Just a mere second before Anna blacked out. Coughing and sucking in air, Anna managed to shake her head.

      “Are you going to be all right?” Emmadonna asked, referring to Anna’s broken heart and not her possible broken ribs.

      “I’ll live,” she said with mild conviction. “I just want to go.”

      “What did he say?” Emmadonna insisted. She always went in for the juice. “Do we need to roll up in here and curse his butt out? ‘Cause you know I will.”

      Emmadonna lived to curse people out. Drama was her middle name. “No.”

      “Humph! I’ll be right back.” Emmadonna turned.

      Anna knew that her protest had been overwritten and that she’d have to confess more than she wanted to in order to stop her well-intentioned friend from getting rowdy. “Charlie didn’t say anything.”

      Now Ivy peered over Emmadonna’s shoulder to stare Anna down. “So what happened?”

      Anna mopped her face again and wished that the earth would just open and swallow her whole. “He didn’t say anything because I didn’t tell him. Okay? Now can we just drop it?”

      “You punked out?” Ivy asked, frowning. “Damn. Do you need me and Emmadonna here to go in and pass him a note to ask if he likes you? He can check box yes or no.”

      Anna huffed in frustration. “Why can’t you just leave it alone?”

      Emmadonna cocked her head as she read Anna’s face easily. “There’s another woman.”

      Jackpot. The two women’s gazes clicked as the friends finally read the truth in her face. Frankly, none of them should’ve been surprised. Charlie was a ladies’ man. He’d never hid or denied that. She should have just left well enough alone. They were just friends—so why did she feel so used?

      “So, who is the bitch?” Emmadonna challenged as she started to remove her earrings. “Did anybody bring a jar of Vaseline?”

      Ivy dug into her purse. “I think I have a small jar.”

      “It’s Roxanne.”

      They froze.

      “Roxanne … as in your roommate? That Roxanne?” Emmadonna checked.

      Anna nodded. “So? Do I have your permission to leave now?” She was on the verge of having another tidal wave of tears hit her and she would rather it happen when she was alone. “And since Roxanne was my ride—any chance one of you mind driving? ”

      “You’re not going anywhere,” Ivy announced, hip-bumping Emmadonna’s plus-size frame out of the way and swinging an arm around Anna’s shoulders. “Screw Charlie … and the horse he rode in on.”

      “Yeah,” Emmadonna cosigned, tossing Ivy’s jar of Vaseline back into her purse.

      “I never liked that weave-o-rific heifer anyway.”

      A small smile returned to Anna’s lips. It was funny to see soft-spoken Ivy get a little feisty on her behalf. “Don’t get mad at Roxanne. She doesn’t know that I like … liked Charlie in that way.”

      “Is there something wrong with her eyes?” Emmadonna countered. “Stevie Wonder can see that—”

      “Em, please. Just drop