Buddha Da. Anne Donovan

nature is like the bright sun. One of the signs,’ says Ally.

      ‘But whit is it she’s been picked for? Sharon wis gonnae enter her for that Evenin Times Beautiful Baby competition, but ah don’t think the closin date’s tae next week.’

      ‘Well, no, it’s no exactly a beauty competition. It’s mair … spiritual beauty.’

      ‘Spiritual beauty?’ The wifie looked at the lamas, her eyes narrowin a bit.

      ‘His spirit is clear like running water,’ says Hammy, and the others nodded.

      ‘Haud on a minute. Whit’s gaun on here? Who are these guys?’

      ‘They’re lamas, holy men.’

      ‘Are yous anythin tae dae wi the Mormons?’

      ‘Perhaps, Jimmy, you could explain the lineage of this beautiful boy whose eyes are like stars which will light the world.’

      Ah wis beginnin tae get fed up wi this stuff.

      ‘Perhaps, Da, you could explain tae the lamas that a wean in a cot wi pink frilly covers isnae a boy.’

      ‘Not a boy?’

      ‘Naw, Rinpoche, it’s a wee lassie, Olivia … ah thought you … surely it disnae make any difference?’

      Ally shook his heid. ‘I’m very sorry, Jimmy, but the baby we are looking for is a boy.’ He turned tae the wifie and bowed. ‘We are very sorry but this baby is not the one. Please accept our blessing.’ He took his prayer beads and waved them above the wean’s heid, mutterin some stuff ah couldnae unnerstaund, then the lamas turnt roond and heided towards the door. At this point Olivia decided she’d had enough and let oot a roar.

      ‘Haud on, whit d’yous think you’re daein? You’ve made the wean greet, wavin they rosary beads in her face.’

      She turnt tae ma da. ‘And as for you, ah don’t know whit the hell you’re up tae but it’s no funny. Tommy’ll kill you if he funds oot – he’s a good Protestant, so he is.’

      ‘Let’s get ooty here, Da.’ Ah startit tae push him up the lobby. ‘Sorry, Missus, he didnae mean any herm.’

      * * *

      Ma da wis awfy quiet on the way back in the van. Ah thought the lamas would be dead disappointed that the wean wisnae the new lama but they never seemed that bothered, went on wi their prayin as though nothin had happened. Ah wis startin tae unnerstaund how ma da had been that taken wi the lamas; there wis sumpn aboot them, they were that cheery and smiley that you couldnae help likin them. But wan thing bothered me.

      ‘Rinpoche, can ah ask you sumpn?’

      Sammy paused in his prayin and turnt roond fae the fronty the van. ‘Of course.’

      ‘Know how thon wean wisnae the new lama – is that because yous had been tellt it definitely wis a boy this time, or does it have tae be a boy?’

      ‘The lama is always male.’

      ‘Is that no a bit sexist?’

      ‘Shoosh, hen,’ says ma da. ‘It’s different for them.’

      ‘How’s it different?’

      ‘You don’t unnerstaund.’

      ‘How am ah gonnae unnerstaund if ah don’t ask?’ Ah turnt back tae Sammy. ‘Ah mean, yous went harin aff lookin for him in Carmunnock. Yous were dead certain aboot it, but the minute yous fund oot the wean’s a lassie you’re oot the door. Suppose Olivia is the new lama?’

      ‘Only a male child can be the successor to the lineage. It is our tradition.’

      ‘That’s no a reason. That’s whit they said aboot no lettin lassies on the fitba team at school but when Alison’s ma wrote tae sumbdy on the cooncil they had tae let us play. And ah’ll tell you sumpn, the team wins a sight mair often since there’s lassies on it.’

      ‘Look hen, this is no the same thing. Just leave it the noo, eh?’

      ‘But, Da …’

      ‘Anne Marie, ah said leave it.’

      Ah wanted tae go on but ma daddy sounded mair weary than anythin so ah shut up. Anyway, there wisnae much point in arguin wi the lamas, they just kept smilin and clickin away at their prayer beads.

      But ah couldnae let it go in ma heid. Ah knew it wisnae right and ah think in his hert ma daddy knew as well and that was how he wis quiet. Thon time wi the fitba team, ma da wis right behind us. He wis the wan that taught me tae play in the first place. Ah decided tae talk tae him on his ain, later.

       Liz

      THE GARDEN OF the cottage was a real suntrap. Never a breath of wind and a bench sat right where it caught the sun all day. We’ve been comin here the first week of July for years and always been dead lucky with the weather. Jimmy, Anne Marie and me always went abroad as well but Mammy doesnae like flyin and it’s a chance for her tae get a break.

      Ah watched her carry the tray doon the stairs, concentratin on every step; there was a slight blur round her haund – wasnae sure if it was the sun playin tricks or if they really were shakin. Mammy’s only sixty-three and up till a few month ago was as fit as a flea, but she had a wee turn just in April there, and she’s no been hersel since.

      She sat doon beside me on the bench and put the tray on the white plastic table.

      ‘This heat would melt ye.’

      ‘Well, it’s gonnae melt they chocolate biscuits in two seconds flat.’ Ah nodded at the plate piled high wi Jaffa Cakes. ‘How many are you plannin tae eat?’

      ‘Ach, ah was thinkin Jimmy and Anne Marie would be here.’

      ‘They’re still at the beach.’

      Ah lifted the plate and took it inside tae the cool of the kitchen. The chocolate was startin tae melt already. Ah left three of the biscuits on the plate and put the rest in the biscuit tin. When ah went back ootside Mammy was flickin through a magazine.

      ‘Would you look at the price of that jumper?’ She pointed tae a multicoloured crocheted thing hingin aff the model’s shoulder. ‘Four hundred and eighty-five pound – and she’s layin aboot on a beach gettin it covered wi sand.’

      ‘Looks like wanny they cushion covers Auntie Betty used tae crochet. Pity she’s no still around – ah could of got her tae make me wan – be dead trendy on the beach.’ Auntie Betty was Mammy’s aulder sister – she’d passed away three year ago.

      ‘Aye, Betty was lovely at crochetin.’

      ‘Aye, Ma, pity she was colour-blind.’

      Auntie Betty used tae make squares in hideous mismatched colours then sew them thegether intae cushion covers and blankets. Mammy’s hoose was full of them.

      ‘Aye, well, whoever crocheted thon jumper must of been colour-blind too – and look at the money they’re gettin for it.’

      ‘Suppose so. But it’s the designer that gets the money – the poor sods that make them probably get paid buttons.’

      Mammy put the magazine on the bench and lifted the mug of tea tae her lips. Ah took a sip of mines but it was too hot for tea; ah felt as if it was stickin tae ma tongue. Ah picked up the magazine and turned tae an article aboot mobile phones.

      Mammy looked over ma shoulder. ‘Thought you’d just bought a new wan?’

      ‘Ah did. But ah’m thinkin of gettin wan for Anne Marie. It’s only four weeks tae her birthday.’

      ‘A phone? At twelve?’

      ‘Ah know. At first when