The Buddha's Guide to Gratitude. Becca Anderson

meaningless verses is

      one

      Dhamma-saying

      that on hearing

      brings peace.

      —Dhammapada, VIII, Attributed to Buddha

      Learn as You Go: How Should I Breathe When I Meditate?

      Meditation often begins with a deep intake of breath and a long exhalation. But you don’t have to keep breathing that way after you’ve started! The deep breath at the beginning is intended to refocus yourself on the moment, on what you’re doing now—namely, the meditation practice. Once you’re refocused, you should breathe normally, allowing your body to take care of itself again while you meditate.

      “If you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath.”

      —Amit Ray

      “Do not encumber your mind with useless thoughts. What good does it do to brood on the past or anticipate the future? Remain in the simplicity of the present moment.”

      —Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche

      “If you aren’t in the moment, you are either looking forward to uncertainty, or back to pain and regret.”

      —Jim Carrey

      “The only thing that is ultimately real about your journey is the step that you are taking at this moment. That’s all there ever is.”

      —Eckhart Tolle

      “Few of us ever live in the present. We are forever anticipating what is to come or remembering what has gone.”

      —Louis L’Amour

      “The present moment is the only time over which we have dominion.”

      —Thích Nhất Hạnh

      “You have to remember one life, one death—this one! To enter fully the day, the hour, the moment, whether it appears as life or death, whether we catch it on the inbreath or outbreath, requires only a moment, this moment. And along with it, all the mindfulness we can muster, and each stage of our ongoing birth, and the confident joy of our inherent luminosity.”

      —Stephen Levine

      Engage and Immerse: Breath-Focused Meditation (One to Five Minutes)

      The breath-focused meditation is typically a short meditation intended to refocus you during your day. You can do this anytime, anywhere. I usually do it when I feel particularly stressed but don’t have a lot of time to meditate.

      Start by sitting in a comfortable position. Take a deep breath in and let it go, slowly, gently closing your eyes, then return to breathing normally. Take a few moments to notice how your body feels. Does it feel good? Are you sore anywhere? Tense anywhere? Once you’ve acknowledged these feelings, allow yourself to let them go. Softly pull your focus inward to your breath. Notice how each intake of air is different from the last. If you find yourself straying to other thoughts, gently let go of them, allow them to pass you by, and bring yourself back to the breath. Allow your breath to lead your mind instead of the other way around. Continue this for a few moments. When you’re ready, slowly, gently open your eyes. Think of the blessings in your life, and continue your day with that sense of being blessed.

      Power Thoughts: A Thankful Way of Life

      “Gratitude and esteem are good foundations of affection.”

      —Jane Austen

      “When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive—to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.”

      —Marcus Aurelius

      “I have found that worry and irritation vanish the moment when I open my mind to the many blessing that I possess.”

      —Dale Carnegie

      “It is impossible to feel grateful and depressed in the same moment.”

      —Naomi Williams

      How You Can Have an Attitude of Gratitude

      1.Be grateful and recognize the things others have done to help you.

      2.When you say, “Thank you,” to someone, it signals what you appreciate and why you appreciate it.

      3.Post a “Thank you to all” on your Facebook page or in your blog, or send individual e-mails to friends, family, and colleagues.

      4.Send a handwritten thank-you note. These are noteworthy because so few of us take the time to write and mail them.

      5.Think thoughts of gratitude—about two or three good things that happened today—and notice the calm settling through your head, at least for a moment. You have activated a part of the brain that floods the body with endorphins, or feel-good hormones.

      6.Remember the ways your life has been made easier or better because of others’ efforts. Be aware of and acknowledge the good things, large and small, going on around you.

      7.Keep a gratitude journal and set aside time each day or evening to list the people or things you’re grateful for today. The list may start out short, but it will grow as you notice more of the good things around you.

      8.Being grateful shakes you out of self-absorption and helps you recognize those who’ve done wonderful things for you. Expressing that gratitude continues to draw those people into your sphere.

      9.Remember this thought from Maya Angelou: “When you learn, teach; when you get, give.”

      10.Join forces to do good. If you have survived illness or loss, you may want to reach out to others to help them, as a way of showing gratitude for those who reached out to you.

Chapter 2

Mindfulness Mantras

      “Radiate boundless love toward the entire world.”

      —Buddha

      Mindfulness is a word that for many has no real, solid definition. It’s all well and good to talk about paying attention to the world around you, but in real life, how practical is that, really? After all, we live in a world where we’re constantly connected—to work, to friends, even to that guy you met once in high school and who occasionally likes your tweets. What good is it to only sit and observe the places you go every day, when there’s so much else going on that you could be missing?

      As many of the people quoted in this book would tell you, practicing mindfulness really does do a lot of good. In an age when practically everyone is struggling with some level of anxiety and depression, mindfulness can help you refocus. It can remind you that you likely have everything you really need. And if you don’t, practicing mindfulness can help you to accept the reality of where you are now, and help you move toward what you need, instead of allowing difficulties and hardships to bog you down.

      Mindfulness is not a get-well-quick scheme. It’s a new way of life.

      “The essence of bravery is being without self-deception.”

      —Pema Chödrön

      “Acknowledging the pain and the suffering that take place inside you, and allowing the feelings, will take time, but this new way of handling these feelings will change the way you relate to you and to the outside world.”

      —Kelly Martin

      “In fact, when you’re mindful, you actually feel irritation more keenly. However, once you unburden yourself from the delusion that people are deliberately trying to screw you, it’s easier to stop getting carried away.”

      —Dan Harris

      “By learning to allow different types of discomfort to simply stay in the room with you, without your scrambling for