The Holy Sh*t Moment: How lasting change can happen in an instant. James Fell

Karate Kid disrespects the work by advocating an extreme shortcut to success. It disrespects the fact that my daughter has been in karate since she was five years old, and trained her ass off, sometimes twenty or more hours a week, to win that gold medal at the USA Open ten years later.

      Work is glorious, and inspired work transforms. It transforms your body, your mind, your spirit. Someone who kicks ass at life is not a sofa-sitter. Such people can be efficient, but they’re not the type always questing for a quick fix. They don’t believe—using weight loss as an example—that some miracle macronutrient ratio is going to open a rift in the space-time-insulin continuum and magically transport their belly fat to a parallel universe. They know effort is required, but they don’t mind, because they’ve become inspired.

      Work equals accomplishment, the forms of which can be innumerable, and such accomplishments are habit-forming. Again, this is far from being just about diet and exercise. For someone who feels their life lacks purpose, it can be an amazing thing to suddenly find more drive than you know what to do with.

      Here is a quick task. It should only take a few seconds, but that doesn’t mean it will be easy. You ready?

      Make a promise to yourself that you’re done with believing in bullshit quick fixes and unrealistic shortcuts to major accomplishment, be they accomplishments with your body, your brain, your career, your finances, or your relationships. Accept reality: it is work creating your desired outcome. Do it now. Integrate this fundamental truth. Then move forward.

      The overarching goal is to change the way you feel about the work so it doesn’t seem like work. That is an attitude adjustment that can happen in just a few seconds. There can be a rapid change in mind-set. You can’t become a karate master quickly, but you can become inspired to do it in an instant. It’s this accelerated mental shift that has the power to change your life.

      As British historian and philosopher Arnold Toynbee said, “The supreme accomplishment is to blur the line between work and play.” Your passion to achieve can be triggered in that single defining moment when you realize, Enough of this bullshit. Motivation is no longer a scarce resource after such a momentous event. It comes built in.

      Being active is hard. Eating healthy is hard. Conquering addiction is hard. Relationships are hard. Making money and advancing your career is hard. Life is hard, whether you choose to work at improving it or not. A life-changing moment can make everything much less of a challenge. Sometimes, if the epiphany is powerful enough, it makes the changes not just easier but mandatory, because every new step feels as though it was meant to be. The recipient of the epiphany is compelled to walk this new path, perhaps even race down it.

      Speaking of racing and things that are hard, recall the words of President John F. Kennedy regarding the space race and putting a man on the moon. He said we choose to do these things “not because they are easy, but because they are hard.”

      You should aspire to do more with your life.

       Because it is hard.

       Act Now!

       Dream (realistically) big and imagine the new person you want to be.

       Think of an ambitious quest you could undertake.

       Develop a thirst for adventure. Remember the librarian who traded cigarettes for swords.

       Consider not using a notebook, but instead committing ideas to memory for regular rumination to achieve later enlightenment.

       Ponder until you “get stuck.” Then engage in a diversion to let your unconscious continue working at it.

       Endeavor to meet the magic moment partway. Realize you may have to engage in some uninspired work prior to the lightning strike.

       Become attuned for lightning to strike. Ask yourself, “Is this it?”

       Ask if a life-changing moment has happened to you before. Examine if this is something you have experience with—determine if you have a past performance accomplishment—so you can use that knowledge to make it happen again.

       Accept that work is not only necessary but glorious in its ability to inspire passion and transform you. Try to find work that will feel like play.

       Remember the words of JFK and embrace change: because it is hard.

PART ONE

       Epiphany and Cognitive Behavior Change

1

       THE ANTIDOTE TO DESPAIR: THE EUPHORIA OF THE LIFE-CHANGING MOMENT

       There are opportunities even in the most difficult moments.

      —WANGARI MAATHAI

      On the schoolyard field of battle known as gym class, I made the geeks look good. I was such a klutz, I was always picked last when teams were selected. I often came out of dodgeball with head trauma.

      In college, I got the “freshman fifteen”—those pounds one tends to put on during their first year—factored by three. I was twenty-two and felt my life was circling the drain. As mentioned before, my health, finances, and scholastic situations were a mess. There was no fall from grace; my life had always been blah, and it was my fault.

      I wasn’t just a bad athlete growing up, but a bad student. I was smart but lazy. I squeaked my way into an easy postsecondary program with half a percentage point to spare, then promptly began failing. I went to the campus pub instead of class. The credit-card companies were calling. Things were bad and looking worse; I was about to be kicked out of school because of my poor grades.

      I was in a hole of my own digging; Joan Baez pulled me out.

      The folk singer’s words appeared in the school newspaper, and my life changed in a moment.

      “Action is the antidote to despair,” the quote read.

      I sat in the food court at my alma mater, reading the comedic highlights of the paper’s section referred to as “Three Lines Free.” It’s a place for students to publish quotes and witticisms and proclamations of undying love or temporary lust. Partway through reading, Joan smacked me in the face. It was so simple to realize that, as bad as things seemed, they could be fixed via concerted effort.

      In that instant, my life switched tracks.

      Because, you see, there was a woman.

      Her name was Heidi. I loved her like no other. You know stories of finding “The One”? This is such a story.

      She was a straight-A student destined for medical school; I knew flunking out spelled the beginning of the end. I say this not to ever speak ill of her. But you must know that she, an amazing woman, deserved a good man; a man I had yet to become.

      I was in a state of despair, and taking action—working hard for something for the first time in my life—was the antidote.

      And suddenly I felt so much better. Even though no effort had yet been expended, the anticipation of having these problems and this beer belly no longer weighing on me was euphoric. It’s like when you hear your parole has been approved and you’re getting out of prison but you’re still in prison. I’ve never been to prison. I got some speeding tickets when I was younger, but I paid them. Anyway, euphoria and stuff …

      Instead of hitting the pub as I’d planned for a few barley-based beverages to wash down a plate overflowing with fries and