Jane Eyre. An Autobiography / Джейн Эйр. Автобиография. Шарлотта Бронте

soon, Mrs. Reed, for I hate to live here.”

      “I will indeed send her to school soon,” murmured Mrs. Reed; and gathering up her work, she abruptly left the room.

      I was left there alone – winner of the field. It was the hardest battle I had fought, and the first victory I had gained.

      Outside the house I looked into an empty field where no sheep were feeding, where the short grass was nipped. It was a very grey day; I stood, a wretched child, whispering to myself over and over again, “What shall I do? – what shall I do?”

      All at once I heard a clear voice call, “Miss Jane! Where are you? Come to lunch!”

      It was Bessie, I knew; but I did not stir.

      “You naughty little thing!” she said walking up the path. “Why don’t you come when you are called?”

      Bessie’s presence seemed cheerful; I put my two arms round her and said, “Come, Bessie! Don’t scold.”

      “You are a strange child, Miss Jane,” she said, as she looked down at me; “and you are going to school, I suppose?”

      I nodded.

      “And won’t you be sorry to leave poor Bessie?”

      “What does Bessie care for me? She is always scolding me.”

      “Because you’re such a frightened, shy little thing. You should be bolder.”

      “What! To get more knocks?”

      “Nonsense! Now, come in, and I’ve some good news for you.”

      “I don’t think you have, Bessie.”

      “Child! What do you mean? Well, but Missis and the young ladies and Master John are going out to tea this afternoon, and you shall have tea with me. I’ll ask cook to bake you a little cake, and then you shall help me to look over your drawers; for I am soon to pack your trunk. Missis wants you to leave Gateshead in a day or two, and you shall choose what toys you like to take with you.”

      “Bessie, you must promise not to scold me any more till I go.”

      “I promise, Miss; I believe I am fonder of you than of all the others.”

      “You don’t show it.”

      “You little sharp thing[16]! And so you’re glad to leave me?”

      “Not at all, Bessie; indeed, just now I’m rather sorry.”

      “Just now! And rather! I think if I asked you for a kiss you wouldn’t give it me: you’d say you’d rather not.”

      “I’ll kiss you: bend your head down.” Bessie stooped; we mutually embraced, and I followed her into the house quite comforted. That afternoon passed in peace and harmony; and in the evening Bessie told me some of her best stories, and sang me some of her sweetest songs. Even for me life had its gleams of sunshine.

      Chapter V

      Five o’clock had hardly struck on the morning of the 19th of January, when Bessie brought a candle into my room and found me already up and nearly dressed. I was to leave Gateshead that day by a coach at six a.m. Bessie was the only person yet risen; she had lit a fire in the nursery, where she made my breakfast, which I couldn’t eat. When Bessie helped me on with my coat and bonnet, she and I left the nursery. As we passed Mrs. Reed’s bedroom, she said, “Will you go in and bid Missis good-bye?”

      “No, Bessie. Good-bye to Gateshead!” cried I, as we passed through the hall and went out at the front door.

      There was a light in the porter’s lodge: my trunk, which had been carried down the evening before, stood at the door. Shortly after the hour had struck six, we heard the coming coach.

      There it was at the gates with its four horses and its top filled with passengers; I was taken from Bessie’s neck, to which I clung with kisses.

      “Be sure and take good care of her[17],” cried she to the guard, as he lifted me into the inside.

      We passed through several towns, and in one, a very large one, the coach stopped; the horses were taken out, and the passengers alighted to dine. I was carried into an inn, where the guard wanted me to have some dinner; but, as I had no appetite, he left me in an immense room with a fireplace.

      The afternoon came on wet and somewhat misty: I heard a wild wind rushing amongst trees. Lulled by the sound, I at last dropped asleep; but I had not long slept when the coach stopped; the coach-door was open, and a person like a servant was standing at it: I saw her face and dress by the light of the lamps.

      “Is there a little girl called Jane Eyre here?” she asked. I answered “Yes,” and was then lifted out and my trunk was handed down.

      I was stiff with long sitting, and I looked about me. Rain, wind, and darkness filled the air; nevertheless, I saw a wall before me and a door open in it; through this door I passed with my new guide. There was now visible a house or houses – with many windows, and lights burning in some; we went up a broad path, and were admitted at a door; then the servant led me into a room with a fire, where she left me alone.

      I stood and warmed my numbed fingers over the blaze when the door opened, and two women entered. The first was a tall lady with dark hair and dark eyes.

      “The child is very young to be sent alone,” said she, putting her candle down on the table. She looked at me attentively for a minute or two, then added —

      “She had better be put to bed soon; she looks tired: are you tired?” she asked, placing her hand on my shoulder.

      “A little, ma’am.”

      “And hungry too, no doubt: let her have some supper before she goes to bed, Miss Miller. Is this the first time you have left your parents to come to school, my little girl?”

      I explained to her that I had no parents. She asked how long they had been dead: then how old I was, what my name was, whether I could read, write, and sew a little: then she dismissed me along with Miss Miller.

      The lady I had left might be about twenty-nine; the one who went with me appeared some years younger: the first impressed me by her voice, look, and air. Miss Miller was more ordinary; she looked, indeed, what I afterwards found she really was, an under-teacher. Led by her, I passed from passage to passage of a large building; till we entered a wide, long room, with great tables, and seated all round on benches, girls of every age, from nine or ten to twenty. They were uniformly dressed in brown frocks, and long pinafores. It was the hour of study; they were busy doing their to-morrow’s task.

      Miss Miller signed to me to sit on a bench near the door, then she cried out —

      “Monitors, collect the lesson-books and put them away!”

      Four tall girls arose from different tables, and gathered the books and removed them. Miss Miller again gave the word of command —

      “Monitors, fetch the supper-trays!”

      The tall girls went out and returned presently, each bearing a tray, with portions of something, and a pitcher of water and mug in the middle of each tray.

      The portions were handed round; those who liked took a sip of the water, the mug being common to all. When it came to my turn, I drank, for I was thirsty, but did not touch the food: I now saw, however, that it was a thin oaten cake shared into fragments.

      The meal over, prayers were read by Miss Miller, and the classes went off, two and two, upstairs. Tired, I scarcely noticed what sort of a place the bedroom was, except that it was very long. To-night I was to be Miss Miller’s bed-fellow; she helped me to undress. I glanced at the long rows of beds, each of which was quickly filled with two occupants; in ten minutes the light was extinguished, and I fell asleep.

      The night passed rapidly. I was too tired even to dream. When I again unclosed my eyes, a loud bell was ringing; the girls were up and dressing. I too rose reluctantly; it was bitter cold, and I dressed as well as I could for shivering, and

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