Leading Wisely. Manfred F. R. Kets de Vries

make you wise. In comparison, it is wisdom that will bring you into a very different orbit. As the philosopher Alfred North Whitehead puts it quite nicely: ‘Knowledge shrinks as wisdom grows.' Wisdom pertains to other ways of knowing or other ways of being intelligent. Unlike knowledge, which is acquired, wisdom comes from within. With the danger of sounding overly simplistic: wisdom has to do with using your common sense to an uncommon degree. It has to do with your talent in judging appropriately the truth and the validity of your accumulated knowledge.

      Wisdom implies that you have the power of discernment, that you can judge properly as to what are the right or wrong things to do. It pertains to your ability to pair your accumulated knowledge and synthesize this knowledge using your moral understanding of the situation. Furthermore, wisdom is knowing what to do with your knowledge – how to use your understanding wisely – as well as recognizing the limits of your knowledge. Thus, another way to define wisdom is the ability to see into the future the consequences of your choices in the present – to know when to take action and when it is useless even to try. It makes knowledge the child of (frequently difficult) experiences.

       Once upon a time there was a king who offered an award to the artist who could create the painting that would best symbolize the idea of wisdom. Not surprisingly, the competition created great excitement in the kingdom. Many artists were eager to submit their works. When the day arrived to exhibit all the works, the king looked carefully at each of the paintings. After much thought, he selected two paintings as the finalists. Having seen the paintings, his subjects wondered which one of the two he was going to choose.

       One painting portrayed a peaceful lake surrounded by beautiful green meadows and framed above by a perfectly blue sky. At first sight, everyone really liked this painting. It gave all the viewers a very tranquil, reflective feeling. The serenity of the study put people's mind to rest. Most people felt that the scenery portrayed in the painting was a very nice way to symbolize wisdom.

       The other painting was totally different. It portrayed a windswept, rainy landscape, overcast with stormy clouds, the scenery further divided by a raging river that, due to the storm, was overflowing its banks. There was nothing restful about this imagery. But to everyone's surprise, after giving it much thought, the king selected this painting.

       Everyone was wondering why? When asked, the king told his subjects to look very closely. When they didn't see what he wanted them to see, he pointed out that in the corner of the painting there was a small rainbow to be seen. Under the rainbow was a little cave – and if you looked very, very carefully, you saw that, beside the cave, a mother bear and her two cubs were peacefully at rest.

       The king explained, saying that wisdom doesn't emerge from a place where there is no noise, no trouble or no challenges. Wisdom derives from knowing how to keep your cool in the midst of a storm.

Acquiring night vision

As I am suggesting, many very knowledgeable and highly intelligent people lack wisdom. Clearly, to acquire knowledge as opposed to wisdom requires very different methods of exploration. Of course, you can study many books to attain greater knowledge, but to study books to attain wisdom will be much more of a challenge. As the German-Swiss novelist Hermann Hesse explains, ‘Knowledge can be communicated, but not wisdom. One can find it, live it, be fortified by it, do wonders through it, but one cannot communicate and teach it.’ To acquire wisdom, you must be willing to observe, experience and act, using the best of your judgement. That is the reason any effort to obtain a modicum of wisdom necessitates a very different curriculum, as the story of the king and the painting illustrates. To read books, helpful as such an activity may be, would not be sufficient.

      Wisdom also implies acquiring a degree of ‘night vision’, meaning having the ability to see what is not so obvious and not to be fooled by superficialities. Many people imagine that they see. In truth, however, they do not really observe. As a result, they do not understand. Generally speaking, people do not see beyond the surface of things; they are used to judging a book by its cover. However, while doing so, they do not see what is happening beneath the surface. What I am trying to say is that wisdom is not increased by acquiring more information, but rather by increasing the capacity of your seeing.

      Sadly enough, many people do not understand the root causes of behaviors and actions. They remain blind to the fascinating world of unconscious phenomena. They do not know how to decipher the subliminal signs. However, there are ways to go about it. In the Preface of this book, I have already mentioned the psychodynamic-systemic lens that I use to add another dimension to the understanding of complex phenomena – in being able to observe things better. For the wisdom equation, such a lens may be a sine qua non.

Clearly, to acquire wisdom, you need to be able to see not only what is on the surface, but also what is beneath it. Unfortunately, as I have mentioned before, most people only see the obvious. Of course, they may have become quite knowledgeable about various subjects by reading, researching and memorizing facts. They may even be able to spout knowledge. Being able to do so makes them seem intelligent. It makes them look clever. However, what should be kept in mind is that people who have all the answers are not necessarily wise. In spite of being perceived as knowledgeable, they may be totally blind to many things. In contrast, wise people are less certain about what is going on in their lives. They may have their doubts in trying to make sense of what is happening around them. As the Persian poet Jalāl ad-Dīn Muhammad Rūmī said, ‘Sell your cleverness and buy bewilderment.’ They very much realize that there is so much that they do not know. There are so many mysteries that need to be deciphered, but it is exactly this particular state of mind that makes them curious to want to learn more. Therefore, it should not come as a surprise that in their wanderings through life, they keep on registering a sense of wonder and bewilderment.

      Sometimes, I wonder whether our wisdom tends to grow in proportion to our awareness of our ignorance. After all, like Socrates, only when we realize that we know so very little will we continue to be searching for greater knowledge. It is exactly the acknowledgement of our ignorance – of all these unknowns – that might motivate us to search for more. In reflecting on this search for more, a Zen story about a Zen master and a prospective student comes to my mind:

       A visitor went to see a Zen master to request him to impart spiritual knowledge to help him to become wise. The Zen master asked him to sit down to have a cup of tea. After he had placed the cup in front of the visitor, he started to pour. Quickly the cup filled up, but the Zen master didn't stop. He kept on pouring, causing the tea to spill out.

       Seeing what was happening, the visitor became increasingly agitated, to finally cry out: ‘Please stop, the cup is full. Don't you see that the tea is running out of the cup?’

       The Zen master replied, ‘Why don't you look at the cup as a metaphor of your mind. The way you spoke to me, it seems like your cup is already completely full. But how, when you think that you already know everything, can you become receptive to new knowledge? How could I ever help you to become wise?’

      As this Zen story suggests, wisdom does not come to people who believe that they have nothing more to learn. After all, you cannot really explore the universe if you think that you are the center of it. If you desire to grow and develop, you should have a never-ending need for a greater understanding of what is happening around you. In particular, if you are looking for wisdom, it is important to always remain curious. You should never let go of this compelling need to find out more about all the unknowns.

Personal qualities

Having wisdom also suggests the possession of an array of personal qualities that will vary in relevance. Among the ones often cited as part of the wisdom equation are compassion, empathy, authenticity, open-mindedness, flexible thinking, humility, judgement, emotional intelligence, courage, curiosity, love of learning and kindness. Obviously, some of these qualities will be