Brains Confounded by the Ode of Abū Shādūf Expounded. Yūsuf al-Shirbīnī

وَٱخُوضُ ٱلْبَحْرْ إِلَى حَدِّ ٱلْحِزَامَهْ وَٱشِدُّ عَلَى ٱلْحِمَارْ وَٱرْكَبْ وَحَوْلِي جَمَاعَهْ شِبْهُ شَمْعَهْ فِي ضَلَامَهْ أَبُو عُنْطُوزْ وَٱبُو بُزْبُوزْ وَعَفْلَقْ وَدَمْ إِلْحَسْ قَفَاكْ وَأَبُو عِمَامَهْ

      Me, Abū Shādūf—O Salāmah¹⁸—

      All my life I’ve made up verses and I’m a bright guy,

      And now my father’s in his grave¹⁹

      I’m shaykh of the hamlet, which none can decry!

      And I rule the foot soldiers and come and go,

      And I wade in the river up to my thigh,

      And I saddle my donkey and mount, around me

      A company like to a candle in the night sky,

      With Abū ʿUntūz and Abū Buzbūz²⁰ and ʿAflaq,

      While Blood-Lick-the-Back-of-Your-Neck and Abū ʿimāmah²¹ are nigh.

      ٢،١٢،١٠

10.12.2

وَٱنَا مَا عَادَ كَيْفِي ٱلْيَوْمَ وَاحِدْ	وَٱضَالْ إنِّي مُجَعْمِصْ فِي شَهَامَهْ
وَأَطْحَنْ قَرْنَ مِنْ خَالَفْ كَلَامِي	بِنَبُّوتِي وَأكْسِرْ بُو عِضَامَهْ
أَبُويَهْ كَانَ قَبْلِي شَيْخْ عَلَيْكُمْ	فَخَلُّونِي وَرُوحُوا بِالسَّلَامَهْ
وَنَخْتِمْ قَوْلَنَا بِمَديحْ مُحَمَّدْ	وَأَصْحَابُو ٱلمِلَاحْ أَهْلِ ٱلْكَرَامَهْ

      These days the world doesn’t hold my like,

      And I’ll boss you forever and go on being a helluva guy,

      And with my cudgel I’ll break the bones and smash the pate

      Of any who disobey.

      My father before me was shaykh over you,

      So let me be, and be on your way!

      And we close our words with praise of Muḥammad

      And his dandy companions, the people of generosity!

      ١٣،١٠

10.13

      قال فعند ذلك حسدوه المشايخ والجدعان على مشيخة الكفر الّتي حصلت له بعد والده على التَرِكة فأغْرَوْا عليه الحكّام فأرسلوا إليه وعارضوه في جانب منها وقيل فيها كلّها ولم ينفعه إلّا مطمورة الزبل الّتي ادّخرها وهي الّتي كانت سبب سعادته بعد موت أبيه على ما قيل ثمّ صار يداري الناس ويتملّق لهم بالكلام إلى أن تناست القضيّة ودخل فصل الشتاء ففتح المطمورة ليلًا وباع الزبل وكثر عليه الرزق على هذا القول وقيل إنّه اقترض عشرين نصفًا وأخذ بهم بيضًا وطلع مصر فصادف عيد النصارى فباع البيض بزيادة عن تَمَنه فكان هذا السبب لسعادته وقد يجمع بين القولين فيقال إنّه باع الزبل وأخذ بثمنه بيضًا فكانت سعادته من مجموع الزبل وثمن البيض فلا تعارض في ذلك وكان يعطي ويتكرّم فقصدته الشعراء والأدباء من أطراف البلاد حتّى أنّه أجاز شاعرًا بخمسين بيضة وكيلة شعير وأعطى آخر مائة قرص جلّة وجاءه آخر بغِرارة فملأها زبل من أوّلها إلى آخرها ودفعها له وكان قد أقبل عليه الرزق بزيادة عن والده فكان عنده وزّتين وعشرين ديك وقَفَص فراخ جريد ونَبّوت أعوج ولِبْدة وخَلَقة زرقاء وقُفّة ملانة نخال وعشر حِزَم عروق جزر ناشف وغير ذلك ولم يزل على هذه الحالة يبارك له المولى في رزقه فإنّما الرزق من الله تعالى

      At this the shaykhs and the brave lads envied him the shaykhdom of the hamlet, to which he had succeeded after his father’s death, and they incited the authorities against him, and the latter sent for him and deprived him of a part or, as some say, of all of it, and he had nothing to fall back on but the binful of droppings, which he had kept out of sight and which had been the source of his prosperity after his father’s death, or so they say. However, he set about sucking up to people and flattering them, until the matter was forgotten and the winter came and he opened the bin one night and sold the droppings and made a good living, according to this version of events. Others, however, say that he borrowed twenty silver pieces and bought eggs with them and went to Cairo, where he happened to arrive on the feast of the Christians,²² so he sold the eggs for more than they were worth, and this was the source of his prosperity. The two versions may be reconciled by saying that he sold the droppings and bought eggs with the proceeds, so that his prosperity was the sum of the price of the droppings and the price of the eggs, and from this perspective there is no contradiction. And he took to handing out money and dispensing hospitality, and poets and men of letters from the farthest hamlets sought him out. One poet he rewarded with fifty eggs and a measure of barley, and to another he gave a hundred dung cakes, and yet another brought him a sack, which he filled with droppings from top to bottom and gave him in payment. He became even richer than his father, for he had two geese, twenty roosters, a chicken hutch made out of palm ribs, a crooked staff, a felt cap, a tattered blue shift, a basket full of bran, ten bunches of dry carrots, and other stuff too, and he continued thus, with the Lord blessing his prosperity—for prosperity comes from the Almighty alone.

      ١٤،١٠

10.14

      (كما اتّفق أنّ بعض الصالحين كان فقيرًا جدًّا) فبينما هو نائم إذ هتف به هاتف يقول له يا فلان امض إلى محلّ كذا خذ منه ألف دينار فقال أفيهم بركة قال