The Vineyard. Karen Aldous

doesn’t know I found you ‘It seems to me then, like you are getting involved, Lizzie said. ‘So tell me, are you just protecting yourself or genuinely wanting to help?’ She felt a fury rise inside her as she hadn’t intended to create conflict. As the waiter put the beer down on the table in front of them, she gulped down a large mouthful from the ice-cooled glass. She had to be careful not to piss him off. After all, she didn’t want him to tell her mother about Thierry.

      ‘Well I’ll tell you what I have in mind shall I?’ he said with an authority that Lizzie couldn’t quite handle. Her mind was confused. On the one hand she was curious but on the other, she wanted to blank her mother. ‘I don’t think there is any point in trying anything. Like I just said, I now have no desire to see her ever again. I’ve managed without her for the last five years or so – even before then, we never did get on. I’ve never depended on her and certainly don’t intend to now.’

      Cal’s eyes lowered down to her wrist and acknowledged the small bead bracelet.

      ‘And the child?’ he questioned. Lizzie looked up and followed his eyes. Could she trust those hematite gems that melted her so fast? She wondered if he was confirming he knew or if he was asking if the child was hers. ‘He’s a handsome chappy. Is he yours?’ he inquired casually.

      Lizzie now felt overwhelmingly protective. ‘Ok! That’s the only reason I’ve come here to see you. I don’t want my mother to know about him. If she is ever to find out that she has a grandchild, then it comes from me.’ Lizzie had to gamble in the hope that she could trust him not to tell her mother. Why? She had no idea – but it was worth trying rather than lying and complicating the matter by telling him Thierry was a friend’s child.

      Cal looked surprised. ‘Why ever not?’ he asked. ‘Why would you want to deprive either of them of a possible wonderful relationship?’

      ‘Well that was what I thought a few days ago. But that’s changed since I saw her as I’ve explained. Call me stubborn if you like, I don’t care. I have no time for that woman and don’t feel she deserves to know my son. That’s the reality. I’m not going into the history.’ Lizzie finished her drink and stood up. ‘I hope you will respect my wishes’.

      With her heart pounding, she could only pray she could trust him with the knowledge. She headed for the door.

      ‘Wait’ he commanded, raising his palm and standing up, then, ushering her to sit again. Lizzie automatically obeyed and found herself perched back in her seat.

      ‘Sorry I don’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable…’ he said, but then, a deep voice with a French accent shot between them.

      ‘Bonjour Lizzie. Are you going to introduce me?’ Immediately she recognized the voice with its jealous tone and she twitched as his petulant icy stare stung her eyes. His familiar expensive cologne hit the air around them as he approached them.

      ‘Anton, hello, this is Cal, my mother’s err… friend,’ she fumbled for the correct term not knowing whether to introduce him as a boyfriend, fiancé, husband or business associate. Anyway, she didn’t like Anton’s tone and wondered if he was out to make trouble. This was the last thing she wanted right now. She glanced at Cal and waved her hand in Anton’s direction.

      ‘This is Anton, my ex.’ She cut short any further information. The two men shook hands in that suspicious manner that only men can’t hide. ‘Cal lives in England and is here on business. He’s in the wine trade.’

      ‘I’m pleased you make the effort to socialize with Lizzie when you obviously have more pressing matters to attend to,’ said Anton.

      ‘I think you should mind your own business,’ Lizzie retorted.

      ‘Isn’t your business now my business? Is my son well?’

      ‘Yes, he is and always has been.’

      ‘Oh, I think he will be better cared for once he has the chance to know his father,’ Anton said, reaching for his wallet and taking out his card. ‘Ring me later. We need to talk,’ he said, placing the card in front of her.

      Lizzie was livid but bit her tongue and waited as he returned to the bar. ‘I’m sorry. He’s my son’s father and has…well, ignore him.’ Lizzie told Cal. This was such an unwelcome intrusion. How did she manage to find these men? She certainly had a knack of falling for the ‘bad’ boys. Anton was obviously still feeling raw from his discovery but why and how did he find her today? How often was she out in a bar with a man? Not even a man who is available. Cal might as well be married and to think Anton would quickly add one and one and come up with four. Was he now going to be back governing her life like he tried before?

      ‘Oh, but I think it’s obvious he still likes you,’ observed Cal.

      ‘No. He only likes himself.’ She lowered her voice, ‘He’s a control freak. I don’t know, insecure, jealous, he’ll never grow up. He certainly hasn’t got what it takes to be a parent.’ Lizzie omitted Anton’s history of drugs. Cal didn’t need to know and certainly neither did her mother.

      ‘He didn’t strike me as the fatherly type.’

      ‘God no, still a child himself.’

      ‘So,’ Cal asserted. ‘Getting back to you and the situation with your mother. I think…’ he paused, sat forward and moderated his tone. His closeness began to take a hold on her. She swore he could hear her heart reverberate round the cafe. ‘The solution is to keep my number so that you can ring me at any time should and, I repeat, should, you change your mind. And,’ he turned his head thoughtfully, ‘I wondered too if I could keep your number in return just so that you are contactable. My reasoning is, to keep some line of communication going.’

      ‘But,’ Lizzie interjected. ‘I’ve already said…’

      ‘Yes, I understand believe me,’ he said patiently. ‘I want you to trust me. Yes, I believe that both of you need a cooling off period but…perhaps more importantly, it’s not unreasonable to propose that at some future date, I may need to contact you, you being the next of kin and vice-versa. What if something happened to you? Who would be contacted with regard to your son?’ Lizzie was about to argue that her close friend Sophie would cope with all that but he was right. It was more a question of practicality. If anything happened, either to her or her mother, Cal’s suggestion was, she figured, unnervingly sensible. She couldn’t believe she was giving in to this man so readily.

      ‘Right, this has to be conditional,’ she demanded, ‘If you keep my number, you have to promise me two things. I don’t want my son’s existence disclosed to my mother, or anyone in England, I would hate for her to find out from someone else and, secondly, my number must be kept hidden from her. I don’t want her ringing me.’

      Cal nodded. ‘Like I said, you can trust me. I will let her know you are ok and that will be all. Knowing how upset she was it will just put her mind at rest.’

      ‘But don’t tell her you spoke to me. She will just keep on at you to tell her more. That’s what she’s like.’ Desperation sounded in Lizzie’s plea.

      ‘Look I’ll just tell her I ran into you in Aix-en-Provence. I won’t reveal a thing, I promise.’ With that he put his hand on hers, which nearly made Lizzie collapse. Again it sent her heart bouncing off the walls but she fought hard to stay in the moment. To read his eyes and know whether she should trust him. She had absolutely no reason to.

      ‘Your secret is safe! Ok? What will I gain from telling her now?’ he asked. ‘It would be far better coming from you when you two decide to speak to one another.’

      Lizzie searched his face for a final reassurance then glanced over at the ogling eyes of Anton at the bar. Fuck she thought. Who do you trust? It’s all too late now anyway.

      ‘Don’t worry,’ he continued, standing close, ‘Just call me if you have a change of heart.’ As she stood, his arm rested around her shoulder and squeezed it, offering that final nudge of reassurance and comfort so needed.

      Weirdly