When I Fall In Love. Miranda Dickinson

for their career, not pursuing something they are passionate about. Kids fulfilling their parents’ ambitions at the cost of their own.’

      ‘And you?’ The question was out before she realised it, far more personal than she was intending.

      ‘Thanks for asking. I count myself as one of the lucky ones because I love what I do.’

      ‘I’m going to attempt to beat Torin’s bar time,’ Jake grinned. ‘Same again for everyone?’

      All agreed apart from Elsie, who decided it was safest to revert to orange juice for the remainder of the evening. As Jake left, Cher grinned at Torin.

      ‘I hope Elsie’s told you about the new exciting venture she’s embarking on?’

      ‘No, not yet. Tell me.’

      ‘A community choir!’ Cher replied before Elsie had the chance to speak. ‘And they’re meeting in my café.’

      ‘I’m impressed,’ Torin replied, and Elsie could have sworn she saw a flicker of genuine sentiment in his expression. ‘Is this something you’re experienced in?’

      ‘No. But then the point of it is to create something new, not regurgitate an old method that has been used before. We’re going to sing a variety of songs and the emphasis will be on fun.’

      Sensing their conversation was safely set up, Cher made her excuses and headed towards the Ladies’. Torin folded his arms and leant back in his chair. ‘So, you know how to have fun, after all?’

      So much for your sincerity, Elsie thought, her hackles rising. However much she might have hoped they could have a civil conversation, it was obviously not going to happen. Ever. ‘I do, as a matter of fact. Which just proves that you know nothing whatsoever about me.’

      ‘It was merely an observation. I guess everyone else must see a different side of you than I have so far.’

      Go figure, Torin. ‘I guess they must.’ She looked at the clock again. Five minutes had dragged their heels past since she last checked. This was going to be the longest hour of her entire life …

      ‘Please don’t be offended. I just have a knack of getting the measure of people very quickly, which I know can be unnerving. It’s an occupational hazard, I’m afraid. I can accurately sum up someone’s character often within a few minutes of meeting them.’

      Elsie couldn’t believe his smugness. ‘You mean you’re quick to judge people? I don’t see that as a skill. I see that as a flaw.’

      ‘Oh really? Well, I’ve already worked you out, Elsie Maynard.’

      ‘Don’t be ridiculous. You can’t possibly know that much about me.’

      ‘I think you’ll find I can.’ He sipped his pint and scrutinised her for an uncomfortable moment. ‘Are you challenging me to prove it?’

      The gall of him! Well, Elsie reasoned, there was only one way to haul him off his high horse. ‘Yes. Yes, I am.’

      Rubbing his hands together, he began. ‘Right. Well, from your blatant misunderstanding of me and misreading of my motives, I can conclude that you have had very little experience of men – one or two serious boyfriends at most. From the small indentation on the third finger of your left hand I can see that one of those relationships resulted in marriage; from the absence of a ring now and your noticeably prickly nature towards men in general I assume that this marriage came to an end, perhaps some time ago. Am I correct?’

      ‘I’

      Elsie swallowed hard as a groundswell of emotion threatened to sweep her off her feet. Torin had unwittingly broken through the layers of carefully constructed defences and his observations stabbed deeply. Momentarily blindsided, she struggled for control and he saw it, the same glint of triumph in his eyes as before.

      ‘What? Nothing to say? Surely this can’t be the great Elsie Maynard, queen of the lightning comeback? I must say, I thought you’d have retaliated by now.’

      He was goading her, she knew it, but the pulse of shock was fast turning to anger within her and she needed a moment to formulate her reply.

      ‘Just – just give me a minute …’

      Torin took a celebratory glug of beer and slapped the table. ‘Aha! Admit it – I totally summed you up! I am too good at this.’

      ‘Fine. You want to know?’ With every last scrap of resolve within her, Elsie rose to her feet. ‘You were correct when you said I’d only had one serious relationship. It did lead to marriage and that marriage ended, eighteen months ago.’

      He spread his hands wide. ‘Hey, it’s what I do. Please don’t be offended. Sit down, would you? We were just beginning to have fun.’

      ‘No, thanks. I think I’ve stayed long enough.’

      ‘Oh come on, Elsie. There’s no need to be embarrassed about it. Plenty of women your age are divorcees.’

      Elsie fixed him with a stare that could freeze sunbeams. ‘That’s true. But not many women my age are widows.’

      With that, she turned her back on a visibly shocked Torin and walked with purpose out of the pub and onto the street beyond. Her promise to Cher was completely forgotten: the only impulse driving her steps was to escape.

      CHAPTER SIX

       Just the way you are …

      Lucas would have loved it. He would have thrown back his lovely black hair and guffawed so loudly that even half-deaf Mrs Rafferty next door would have heard it. And Elsie would have laughed with him – it was impossible not to when faced with a laugh as infectious as his. Even towards the end of his battle, when every movement required concerted effort, his laugh was the one part of him that never succumbed to the cancer claiming his body. Jim often said he heard Lucas laugh more during the last year of his life than in all the years he’d known him. But then the last year was something Lucas was determined to enjoy. He had a point to prove – a list to fulfil. And each of the items on The List he created for their final year together was designed to amuse them both, to squeeze every last drop of joy out of the time they had left.

      Lucas Webb was a lover of the absurd, his sense of humour one of the things Elsie loved the most about him. He could find the ridiculous, hilarious side of any situation, no matter how grim it first appeared. The bleak diagnosis of his cancer was no exception to this: and his coping mechanism was the spark for The List.

      When Dr Hayes had delivered the devastating news to Lucas and Elsie in the too-small, too-warm consulting room in the Royal Sussex County Hospital, their first reaction had been mind-numbing shock and disbelief, quickly leading to body-shaking sobs as they both broke down. Twelve months, at most – a meagre allocation for someone who loved life as much as Lucas did. All their plans – travelling, a business of their own, children – now lay screwed up and discarded like the balls of paper strewn in the dull grey metal bin beneath Dr Hayes’ regulation NHS desk. The sense of injustice was immense, a crushing weight of hopelessness robbing the room of oxygen, deeper than Elsie had ever experienced.

      But an hour later, when they were walking hand-in-hand along Brighton Pier, a remarkable transformation began in Lucas. Elsie remembered him stopping, near the entrance to the amusements, hope blazing in his dark brown eyes.

      ‘Elsie, I’ve had quite possibly the most brilliant idea!’

      So startling was the sea change in his mood that Elsie gave an involuntary laugh. ‘What is it?’

      ‘OK. Hear me out. When I heard the diagnosis this morning I was like, “Only twelve months?” But I’ve thought about it and I realised – we have twelve months. Twelve months to do whatever we like and nobody can argue with us! So, here it is: we make a list of things we have to do. And I’m not talking about naff stuff like swimming with dolphins