The Idol. Vadim Kycherenko

We heard nothing didn’t we, Vasil?

      Tomov. You were sleeping like gophers in their holes.

      Anna. Hey, you!

      Mancev. Anna, go on!

      Anna. «A mighty avalanche fell down at midnight sharp. At that moment a radio connection with a group of mountaineers climbing up the Devil’s Fang broke».

      Tomov. The guys are totally screwed up!

      Vasil. Don’t croak!

      Anna. Spit three times and knock at a piece of wood right away!

      Tomov. Well, if it helps them… Vasil, where is your head to knock at?

      Anna. «By morning several rescue brigades headed for the mountains. However, the group of climbers have not been found yet. Their traces are lost».

      Levan. No wonder they are lost! The devil is going to break his neck there. Believe me or not?

      Mancev. That’ s why it is called the Devil’s Fang.

      Tomov. This peak won’t have mercy on anyone. And it won’t let anyone back.

      Anna. But we have gone through. Haven’t you forgotten?

      Tomov. It’s by a fluke. Blind luck. I wouldn’t take such a risk for the second time. (Singing). «Hey, apple, where are you rolling? Should you get to the Devil’s Fang you won’t roll back»!

      Anna. Vasil, Vitya, just tell him! Is there a hope?

      Vasil. Just a slight one.

      Mancev. In what area were they when the radio connection broke?

      Anna. It doesn’t say.

      Levan. Is there anything else?

      Anna. Yes, there is. (Reading). «Before this accident the Devil’s Fang was conquered only by a group of climbers headed by the famous mountaineer Victor Mancev…»

      Sumyatov. Alla, you see? Here is a bright confirmation of my words!

      Alla. What are you talking about?

      Sumyatov. Victor Mancev! The others are not even mentioned.

      Alla. Come on! Does it really matter now?

      Sumyatov. What about fairness? Where is fairness, I ask you?

      Anna. Vasil, from now on you won’t go to the mountains without me, got it?!

      Vasil. Without you – no way. Who am I going to look for there?

      Tomov. God, damn those mountains!

      Levan. Why are you saying that, eh? Listen, while we are coursing here they are perishing!

      Tomov. That’s true, Levan! We should go to rescue them.

      Anna. Vasil! Why are you silent?

      Vasil. What should I say? If we go, let’s go then.

      Levan. Aren’t we men, eh?!

      Anna. Sure we are! Vitya, tomorrow morning we are starting, right?

      Mancev. You know what guys… I can’t join you now.

      Anna. Why?!

      Tomov. What’s the matter Vityok? Are you crazy?

      Mancev. Crazy? No. I just need to stay at this camp for one or two days.

      Vasil. How are we going to go without you?

      Mancev. At least one day. Try to understand me, it is very important!

      Levan. We do understand you, dear! Believe it or not.

      Mancev. Oh, whatever! (Leaving).

      Sumyatov. You see, here is your idol in its true guise!

      Alla. You think he got scared? I don’t believe it! No way!

      Sumyatov. Don’t be such an idealist.

      Alla. Okay! I bet you came here with a specific purpose and you are not going to give it up.

      Sumyatov. With what purpose? Tell me! Don’t be shy!

      Alla. To overthrow the idols – here is you purpose! You don’t even hide it.

      Sumyatov. All or nobody. It would be just fair.

      Alla. And the climber Victor Mancev is going to be the first victim of your noble intention?

      Sumyatov. I guess, the victims are those whose fame he has appropriated.

      Alla. Oh, you, journalists!

      Sumyatov. Why are you so sarcastic?

      Alla. Doesn’t life seem boring to you with such a way of thinking?

      Sumyatov. I can’t understand you, Alla!

      Alla. Bad for you.

      Sumyatov. Sorry.

      Alla. Did you get offended? Don’t be a kid.

      Sumyatov. Well, Let me leave you and have a glass of tomato juice (Coming up the bar counter). One glass of bloody Mary, please!

      Tomov. You have a beautiful wife, buddy. I get envy you!

      Sumyatov. Please, don’t. We’ve just met.

      Tomov. Lucky you! One can fall in love with such a lady at the first sight.

      Sumyatov. And fall out of love after the first date.

      Tomov. Whatever. You won’t get offended If I run after her?

      Sumyatov. It’s up to you. (Leaves).

      Tomov. Levan, two alcohol cocktails to the first meeting please!

      Levan. Aren’t you crazy, dear?

      Tomov. Don’t kill the rising fair feeling. Just as an exception! I will be your debtor till the end of my life, believe me!

      Levan. Okay, but I am taking big risk. You know about the prohibition at our camp.

      Tomov. I got you. I am not a fool. How much?

      Levan. A double price.

      Tomov. If only risk would always be paid like that where could we find cowards, Levan?

      Levan. I am not insisting, dear.

      Tomov. Take your coins, you the risky guy! (Coming up to Alla). Excuse me for intrusion…

      Аllа. Don’t intrude and I won’t have to excuse you.

      Tomov. What a strict lady!

      Alla. I am a very expensive lady.

      Tomov. That’s good. I don’t like cheap stuff.

      Alla. Are you sure you can afford me?

      Tomov. I have a fat wallet, don’t worry. Wouldn’t you mind to have a drink with me?

      Alla. You’d better start with it. To what are we going to have a drink?

      Tomov. To you, my lady!

      Alla. It’s trite.

      Tomov. Then…

      Alla. Don’t strain yourself. I have an idea. Let’s drink to the real men, that they would still exist in our world!

      Tomov. Terrific toast!

      Anna. Vasil, listen! (reading a newspaper). «A house for sale. The house located in the suburban area faces the mountains, has five rooms and a garden of fifteen hundreds square meters…» It’s great, isn’t it?

      Vasil. Terrific!

      Anna. I wish I had such a house. We would take your mom there! The doctors tell her to walk more in the open air.

      Vasil. How much is it?

      Anna. It doesn’t say. Levanchik, how much could be a house in this area?

      Levan. It might be fifty or one hundred thousand dollars.

      Anna. Oh, It’s impossible!

      Levan. Why should I tell lies?!

      Anna. Come on, this is a daylight robbery!

      Levan.