Welcome to Mills & Boon. Jennifer Rae

the sobs started. Even with the air conditioning, the air felt oppressively hot. I stripped down to a tank top and tiny shorts and collapsed on the bed. Posters on the walls that I’d put up as a hopeful teenager, of places I’d hoped to see and the life I’d hoped to live, stared down at me mournfully. It felt like the walls were closing in.

      As my head hit the pillow, I wept, covering my face, wept with choked sobs until there were no tears left, and I slept.

      The phone woke me up. I flung my arm to answer it.

      “What is your answer?” My agent’s voice pleaded.

      Slowly, I sat up in bed. My hair felt smashed against the side of my face, and the tank top I’d been sleeping in barely covered my breasts properly. I felt sore, too. For a moment I smiled, remembering how Edward had made love to me last night.

      Then I remembered what had happened afterward. How I’d seen Victoria sneaking into his house for one last fling.

       It’s nothing. Just one last thing I want to do before I say my marriage vows

      Cold despair seeped through me, and I pulled up my comforter almost to my neck.

      “Well, Diana?” My agent said with desperate good cheer. “Do you want to be a star?”

      I felt awful. Outside, the morning light was clear, the sky a pale blue. It almost never rained in California. Not like Cornwall. I missed the fog and bluster and wild gray storms. They suited me better.

      “Diana? The blockbuster in Romania? Are you in?”

      “Sure,” I said dully. “Why not?”

      His congratulations were so loud I had to pull the phone away from my ear. Then he started talking about terms and conditions and other contract stuff I didn’t care about. Hanging up, I pulled on a robe and went downstairs.

      “Rough night?” Madison looked up from the kitchen table, where she was now eating a bowl of cornflakes. Then her eyes widened. “Nice ring.”

      I looked down at my left hand. “Yeah,” I said dully. “Want it?”

      She laughed. “Good one. So you’re engaged? I’m so happy for—”

      “Edward’s cheating on me.”

      Madison’s mouth fell open. Then she looked dubious. “Are you sure? He seemed so in love with you last December. I mean, I even flirted with him,” she blushed a little, “and he totally froze me out.”

      “I’m sure. I saw a woman he knows, his cousin’s wife, going into his place late last night. Wearing a sexy dress.”

      “There could be all kinds of reasons for that. Geez. Maybe, um...” She frowned, scratching her head. “Hmm.”

      “I don’t want to talk about it,” I said, grabbing the milk and a bowl.

      Madison pressed her lips together. “All right,” she said finally. “Whatever you need. I’m here for you.”

      I stared at her incredulously. “What happened to you in Mongolia?”

      “What do you mean?”

      “You seem so—different.”

      “I grew up, I guess,” she said quietly. “I decided to stop taking other people’s stuff. Their careers. Their lovers. It never made me happy. It only made me feel bad about myself.” Her eyes met mine as she whispered, “I’m so sorry for what I did to you.”

      I stared at her in shock, trying not to cry.

      Then Madison’s mouth fell open as she looked past me. In slow motion, I turned around.

      Edward stood in the kitchen doorway behind me, dressed in a tuxedo that was molded to his perfect body. He smiled, looking from Madison to me. “Looks like all is forgiven.” His blue eyes glowed with joy. “How soon can you be ready to go?”

      My lips parted in a silent gasp. Then snapped shut.

      How dare he act like this—look at me as if he loved me—when he’d been with another woman last night? And Victoria, of all the women on earth! Did he truly have no soul? I couldn’t bear to even look him in the face.

      Reaching down, I pulled off the enormous diamond ring. My fingers were swollen, so I had to yank hard. I held it out to him coldly.

      “I’ve changed my mind,” I said. “I can’t marry you.”

      His broad shoulders seemed to flinch. There was a small sound from the back of his throat. He took a single step forward. I heard his low demand of a single word.

      “Why.”

      He was looking at me as if I’d betrayed him. As if I’d broken his heart. My throat hurt. How could Edward look at me like that, when he was the one who had never loved me?

      Lifting my chin, I looked at him, my fists clenched almost violently. “I thought I could marry you without love,” I whispered. Shuddering, I shook my head. “I can’t.” It was tantamount to admitting my own love for him. I felt like a pathetic fool. “I want the real thing.”

      My arm shook as I continued to hold out the ring.

      He stared down at the twenty-carat diamond ring as if it were poison. He seemed to shudder. “Keep it.”

      “I can’t.” I pushed the ring into his hands. My heart hurt so much I could hardly keep from crying. “It’s better this way. You can go back to London, and I’ll be going to Romania to star in a movie....” The movie? Who cared about that? What was I even saying? I shook my head desperately. “We’ll work out custody. You can visit our baby whenever you want.”

      He looked down at the enormous diamond ring, gleaming in his hand.

      “Visit?” he said dully.

      “Yes, of course, you...” My throat constricted. “I just want you to be free.”

      “Free.” He lifted expressionless eyes to mine.

      Unable to speak, I nodded.

      “I thought I could make you happy.” His voice was like a sigh, the last breath of a dying man. He tried to smile even as I saw a suspicious sheen in his eyes. “But I can’t force you to marry me. Of course you deserve love. You deserve everything.”

      My heart twisted. I felt as if I were drowning in the haunted sea of his eyes, seeing right through his armor to the anguished soul within. Was it possible I was wrong? Was there any other explanation for what I’d seen?

      “What did you do last night?” I cried out.

      Staring down at me, he sucked in his breath. Then he grimly shook his head. “It doesn’t matter.”

      “Tell me,” I begged. I knew I was making a fool of myself, but I couldn’t stop. If there was any chance, any chance at all that I was wrong... “What did you do when I left you last night?”

      He stared down at me for a moment in the kitchen. Then he slowly shook his head.

      “It’s better you don’t know,” he said quietly. Leaning forward, he cupped my cheek. “I will always provide for you and the baby, Diana.” Leaning down, he kissed me softly, one last time. “Take care of her. Be happy.”

      And he was gone.

      I stared after him, gazing at the empty doorway, standing on the cold tile floor wearing a robe, a tank top that didn’t quite cover my belly, skimpy sleep shorts and a dumb expression.

      My stepfather’s lavish, enormous kitchen turned blurry around me and I realized I was crying. I couldn’t even feel the tears. All I could think was that I’d been so stupid. I’d let Edward St. Cyr break my heart not once, but twice....

      “You are so stupid,” Madison said aloud, as if she’d read my mind and agreed wholeheartedly. Wiping my