Gathered Up. Annabeth Albert

with you. And I know I’m going to have a hundred comments, all asking me about the recipient, and all I can say is: no comment. Not yet at least…—Evren’s Yarnings

      The day of my birthday was the sort of perfect Portland spring day that makes all the rainy months worth it—gorgeous blue skies, mild temperatures, and green everywhere we looked. People too. The buses and sidewalks were crammed with people soaking up the change in seasons. The zoo was packed, but the kids had a great time. We didn’t have the money to do many outings like this, so it was nice to indulge them a bit. The girls wore the flowers Ev had knit them, and I posed them by a statue and sent him the picture. He replied back quickly.

      Happy birthday, tatlim. I am looking forward to later ;)

      Ha. I sincerely doubted there would be anything to wink over tonight, not with the kids and Mira around and Renee glued to her phone like it was a needy infant, responding to the slightest beep with a little excited “oh!” Yeah, no way was I getting her to watch the kids long enough for us to sneak off. And I also really needed to download a Turkish translator app. I knew he liked sneaking the little Turkish pet names in, but I really wanted some sort of hierarchy to them that could magically reveal how he felt about me. Was he over the bisexual bias enough to see me as more than a friend with benefits? Did I want to be seen that way? I studied the flamingo exhibit, like the gaudy birds might have a clue about my twisted feelings.

      “Come on, Brady! Snakes are next!” Jonas bounced on his feet. Slimy reptiles. That was more like it. No mooning over fanciful creatures and even more unrealistic thoughts. I might love—

      Wait. Where did that thought come from? I most certainly was not falling in love with Ev. Even I wasn’t that stupid.

      “Wait up, buddy! We’re coming, too.” Stop thinking impossible things. Focus on the kids.

      My thoughts were still jumbled when we arrived at Ev and Mira’s that night, lumpy cake in tow. It was supposed to be vanilla with chocolate frosting and sprinkles, but it looked more landslide than layer cake. The twins had taken a very rare nap when we’d come home, leaving me and Jonas to make the cake while Renee murmured sweet nothings into her phone.

      Balancing the cake on the bus ride up Alberta didn’t help its appearance any. Ev let us in the back entrance, and he was exceedingly polite to Renee, whom he was meeting for the first time. When we reached the top of the stairs, he did that thing again where he kept looking at my mouth. I might not know exactly how we felt about each other, but I knew what that signal meant.

      I brushed a quick kiss across his mouth, reveling in how his whole body seemed to light up from the contact.

      “Eww.” Renee rolled her eyes. “If you get to make out with your boyfriend, does that mean I can bring Indigo over when I have the kids tomorrow?”

      “Absolutely not.” I had rules with her about having friends over when she was watching the kids for good reason. I did, however, notice that neither Ev nor I corrected her about the boyfriend label.

      “What can I help you with?” I asked him in the kitchen a few minutes later, once we got the kids settled in the living room with a TV program and a dozing Mira.

      “This.” Ev pushed me against the fridge, kissing me hungrily. He licked at my lips before spearing me with his talented tongue. I loved when he took charge like this, and I was grateful the cold press of the fridge held me upright and kept me from combusting.

      “Happy birthday,” Ev said as he pulled away. “Now you may help me plate things.”

      “No fair.” I laughed. “You turn me into goo and then you put me to work?”

      “Exactly.” He winked at me.

      “Sorry Renee’s being pissy,” I said as I held a platter for Ev to arrange skewers of meat on. “She’s all hung up on this boy.”

      “I know the feeling.” He gave me a long, searching look that made me shift from foot to foot. “Waiting for the next text.”

      My laugh was tinged with the relief that I wasn’t alone in the craziness. “Counting down the hours until the house is quiet enough to call.”

      “Trying to figure out how much kissing you can get away with on the clock.” He dumped a bunch of rice into a bowl.

      I cast a glance back toward the living room. “Or with small people around.”

      “At least one more.” Ev set the rice down and pulled me into the corner for another scorching kiss.

      “Okay. Maybe I can’t be too hard on her,” I said, panting hard as we finally came up for air. “Does it bug you when the kids call you my boyfriend?”

      “Should it?” Ev raised an eyebrow.

      “No! I mean, I’m not encouraging it, but I wouldn’t mind…” I trailed off, not sure how much of my inner wants to reveal.

      “Yes, you wouldn’t mind?” Ev encouraged, still all crowded into my space, not giving me room to regroup.

      “I wouldn’t mind if it was…accurate.”

      “Well, I am a male. And we are very good friends, yes?”

      “Yeah…” I drew the word out. “If you want to get technical. But there are other definitions…”

      “And you are going to let the kebabs get cold while you figure out which is most accurate?” Ev raised both eyebrows this time, his expression pure mirth. He had me on the ropes and he knew it.

      “You’re enjoying this far too much,” I grumbled.

      “The Knit Night ladies keep calling you my boyfriend, too,” Ev mused. “And as with the children, I strangely do not mind. Do we need a specific definition? Isn’t it enough to just enjoy this…whatever? For however long I’m still needed here?”

      I need you here always. I realized with the sharp clarity of a perfect espresso shot that I didn’t want a whatever with Ev. I wanted the standard definition—the not seeing other people, cuddling up at the end of the day, putting each other first....

      And there the fantasy fell apart because that wasn’t happening for either of us. We barely had time for discreet kissing, let alone a real relationship.

      But damned if I didn’t want one.

      “No phone at the table,” I said to Renee for the third time. She’d been hiding it in her palm and under the tablecloth, but I knew what she was up to.

      “You texted Ev during dinner the other night,” she accused. She wasn’t wrong, and I resolved to crack down on both of us, even during quick meals.

      “I had a good reason,” I lied. “And we are guests. Put the phone away.”

      “It is fine.” Mira smiled indulgently at us. Her smile wasn’t quite worth the awkward family argument, though, and I needed Renee not to be rude.

      “Fine. I think I’m taking off after dinner anyway. I’ve got a huge test tomorrow.”

      “So you’re going home to study?” I couldn’t keep the skepticism from my voice.

      “Library.” She studied her flat bread intently, refusing to meet my eyes. “There’re too many distractions at home.”

      I had a feeling there was a six-foot distraction named Indigo at the library, but I leveled a glare at her instead.

      “I can take you and the children home later,” Ev said to me.

      “Wonderful.” Renee gave him a gold-medal smile. “See, Brady? It’ll all work out. You get to hang out with your boyfriend and I get to…study.”

      I coughed. “Invite Indigo to get a coffee with you at People’s Cup this week. I think I need to lay eyeballs on this kid.”

      “No!” Her eyes went wide. “You’ll scare him off. Besides, I haven’t exactly told him about…you.”