Sister Lilian’s Pregnancy & Birth Companion. Lilian Paramor

you is that you know how to prepare for challenges and are very courageous. You will not enter pregnancy, labour, birth and parenting without due thought and a few plans in hand. Your need to be in control can work both for and against you. To a certain extent pregnancy, labour and mothering require that you simply go with the flow, adapting from moment to moment so that you can profit from the opportunities that arise. You might need to learn to do this. Creating a birthing environment over which you have more control can greatly improve your experience and consequently your perception of how painful labour was.

      Qualities

      Other character traits: determined, efficient, ambitious, precise, orderly, critical, angry, stubborn, enterprising, intense, analytical, sarcastic, good leadership ability, intolerance of foolishness.

      Physical characteristics: medium bone structure, tend to early greying or balding, perspire freely, determined stride, medium strength and endurance, intense eyes, pointed red tongue.

      Eating pattern and lifestyle: meals must be on time, prone to great hunger, large appetite, prefer cool foods and drinks, intolerant of spicy foods (even though you might crave them), love competitive sport, always punctual.

      Disease pattern: tension from prolonged hard work, acidity, indigestion, acne, skin rashes, halitosis, ulcers, piles, hot flushes, inflamed red joints.

      Tips to prepare for pregnancy

      •Slow the pace of your intense activity before and during pregnancy, becoming almost what you would dismiss as a little inefficient. You will notice that there are other dimensions to life, that relaxation can be beneficial and that you are doing a very important job – growing your child!

      •Treat yourself to a weekly aromatherapy or reflexology session by an experienced therapist. This will enhance your ability to relax and ‘do nothing’, allowing someone else to do something for you. You will also notice that being in control is not all that counts.

      •Participate in a moderately strenuous, regular exercise programme. Good exercise includes swimming, walking, stretch exercises and yoga. Avoid competitive sport which places extra demands on your energy and your body’s innate regulatory system.

      •Enjoy the calming effect of nature as often as possible.

      •A water feature can also be very calming for intense women like you.

      GROUP 3: RELAXED BUT TENDING TO COMPLACENCY

      If there is one group of women to be envied for their seemingly natural talent for life, pregnancy, labour and mothering, it is this one. They’re often the Earth Mother type but may not always seem to be at first glance. What is apparent is that they are completely relaxed. They make great friends because they seldom criticise and are very tolerant of others. If you belong to this group, your build is that of a true athlete, big-boned and strong. One of your downfalls is that you love sweet treats and might carry a bit more weight than ideal. You are fortunate to have a high pain threshold and take things in your stride.

      Qualities

      Other character traits: ability to relax, complacency, loyalty, jealousy, a usually placid nature, friendliness, an excellent memory, serenity, affectionate, forgiving, slow and methodical, graceful, slow to anger, tranquillity.

      Physical characteristics: strong build; easy weight gain; rhythmic walk; smooth, lustrous skin; thick hair; large, moist eyes; good endurance and stamina; dislike damp and cold; bulky tongue.

      Eating pattern: skip meals easily; slow digestion; slow eater; emotional eating; slow, groggy start to day; sleep deeply; enjoy endurance sports; often late for appointments.

      Disease pattern: diabetes; allergies; obesity; depression; mucus congestion; sinus, bronchitis; moist cough; high cholesterol; loose, aching joints.

      Tips to prepare for pregnancy

      •Exercise regularly to make the most of your natural endurance. Walking, jogging, water aerobics in the first two trimesters and dancing are all good for you. You can build up to quite strenuous levels. You will not be too relaxed and will be in really good physical nick for the birth.

      •Practise a few time-management skills to help you deal with the busy days that lie ahead but don’t lose the ability to see things in perspective.

      •Take special heed now already of the general nutritional and other specific tips (see Nutrition for a healthy pregnancy and baby).

      •If you are overweight, ensure that you lose most excess kilos before conceiving to help make pregnancy a more comfortable experience.

      •If allergies are a problem for you or close family members, avoid the six most common dietary allergens – wheat, cow’s milk, soy, fish, eggs and peanuts – from before pregnancy, as well as any that you or your partner are specifically allergic to.

      •Much as you like those lazy lie-ins, wake by 06h00 to keep your system balanced, or ensure that your body’s innate regulatory systems are performing optimally.

      •For you, travel is therapy that keeps you young and happy. Arrange regular trips!

      •Start a new hobby that will keep you energised and alert.

      •Set your watch a little ahead for better timekeeping.

      ALCOHOL, RECREATIONAL DRUGS AND SMOKING

      Over the years, many women have contacted me to share their anxiety about the effect these habits will have on their newly conceived babies. By the time you confirm pregnancy, four to eight very important developmental weeks have already passed. These habits can wreak potentially devastating harm during this time.

      Alcohol and recreational drugs

      The only known safe limit for alcohol and recreational drugs in pregnancy is none. How your body reacts to alcohol depends on your individual make-up. According to all available research, an occasional glass of wine or liqueur will probably not harm Baby. Bingeing, even seldom, can be as detrimental as frequent heavy drinking. Spirits should be avoided. Heavy alcohol intake in pregnancy is associated with a whole syndrome of problems, including poor brain development. While very moderate use is not a reason for much concern, it is better to be safe than sorry. If there is any tendency to alcohol or other dependency in either family, even if you have no such problem, it is better to abstain during pregnancy and breastfeeding as this can trigger dependency in the developing baby.

      Many women worry about alcohol used before they knew they were pregnant. It would be better to avoid or greatly reduce this if you are planning a pregnancy, in case conception does occur, but sometimes the unexpected happens. Although I cannot give absolute reassurance on this score, if alcohol has not been a problem for you or the baby’s dad, and you have not really overdone it in the early weeks, it is unlikely that you need be concerned.

      Drug use and abuse is serious as it can trigger dependency in babies. If it is a once-off experience, your baby has plenty of time in the womb to experience nature’s healing and cleansing effects. Unfortunately, there is no guarantee that no harm will be done. The early scan will usually show whether Baby’s development is on course.

      Smoking

      Smoking in pregnancy has a wide range of deleterious effects. Fertility is also compromised in smokers. The blood vessels leading to the placenta are more likely to have abnormalities which means that the placenta is usually thinner and more fragile. This is the baby’s life-support system, affecting oxygen and nutrient supply to Baby, and waste disposal. Smokers have twice as many miscarriages and stillbirths, possibly due to the poor state of the placenta or abnormalities of the developing baby that make Mother Nature abort spontaneously.

      It is said that less than ten cigarettes a day is not too risky for a developing baby, but the hard truth is that these babies are more prone to respiratory conditions, sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) and allergies after birth, no matter the number smoked, although the less the better. It is not easy to quit, but if you can, you will be doing your baby a lifelong favour. I would encourage