A Smart Girl's Guide: Boys (Revised). Nancy Holyoke

means that many girls may be taller and more physically mature than

      most boys their age up until high school. For the same reason, girls are often

      ready to be interested in boys earlier than boys are ready to be interested in

      them. That difference can lead to confusion and disappointment for girls.

      Before hormones

      After hormones

      [page012]

      staying normal

      I don’t have any problem being myself around girls, but

      sometimes when boys are around, I can’t seem to be me.

      I just act weird.

      Breena

      A lot of girls find it hard to act normal. The simplest thing—like passing

      an assignment to the boy in the next desk—may send clouds of questions

      rolling through your mind.

      What if he starts to like me?

      What if he starts to think

      I like him?

      What if my friends think he

      and I like each other and

      embarrass me about it?

      What if I start to like him and

      he doesn’t like me back?

      What if he and I start liking

      each other at the same time?

      WHAT THEN????

      You start acting, well, WEIRD.

      So what’s weird? For instance:

      You talk too much

      Ahmad is standing next to you in line. Suddenly you hear yourself

      jabbering away as if your mouth weren’t connected to your brain.

      Weird-O-Meter Rating:

      Slow down. It will give you time to think before you speak. Don’t run

      your words together. Take a breath between sentences. Ask questions.

      Conversations involve both people talking, after all. And while he’s

      looking for words, you’ll have more time to get a grip on your own.

      You pretend you’re invisible

      C.J. and Matt are so cute! They’re talking to your best friend during a break

      in gym. You’d like to join them, but what if you say the wrong thing? You

      stay where you are and count bricks in the wall.

      Weird-O-Meter Rating:

      Try not to avoid boys. It will only make your nerves worse. Remind yourself

      that it’s natural for girls and boys to be fluttery around one another at this

      age. The way to learn to talk to boys is to talk to boys. Practice makes perfect.

      Or, at least, with a little practice, talking to boys won’t be such a big deal.

      You act too cool

      Louis is cute, Zach is awesome, and Ian is cool. You have to walk past

      them all on the way to your locker. You put a big smile on your face,

      pretend you’re a movie star, and hope they buy the act.

      Weird-O-Meter Rating:

      Most of us put up a front when we’re nervous. Acting relaxed is the next

      best thing to feeling that way. It helps a person stay in control. But the

      goal is to look like yourself, not to look like someone else. So don’t

      overdo the cool. Get the movie star out of your head, and picture

      yourself the way you were coming off the soccer field after the last

      winning game.

      You laugh like a hyena

      Manuel cracks a joke. You go heeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheehee

      heeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheeheehee

      heehee—and can’t stop until the teacher walks up and raps on your desk.

      Weird-O-Meter Rating:

      Giggling too much makes you look hysterical. You’re just not good company

      if you’re out of control. So close your mouth, freeze your chest, and hold

      your breath for a moment. Glance away. Do something with your hands—

      grab a pencil, fool with the straps of your backpack. Concentrate on pulling

      yourself together, and don’t relax till you do.

      who

      likes

      whom?

      “liking” a boy

      I have a group of really great friends who are each unique and

      creative in their own way. Some of them happen to be boys.

      There’s this one kid I’ve known since the third grade, but now

      that we’re getting older, I’m starting to like him differently

      (if you know what I mean).

      Meg

      Chances are that, for years, you’ve had certain ideas about the boys

      around you.

      The boys you’ve always liked will probably be the same kind of boys you

      end up “liking.” In fact, some girls who have had boy buddies for years may

      find that their feelings for them are beginning to change. Is that boy you

      have fun talking to a “friend” or a “boyfriend”? All of a sudden, you may

      not be quite sure.

      getting to

      know a boy

      I would really like to have a boy for a friend.

      Elizabeth

      You may find yourself looking at a certain boy and wondering how you can

      get to know him better.

      For starters, be friendly. Run a smile up the flagpole. Say hi in the hall. If

      you’re in the same study group, ask what he thinks of the new gym teacher

      or compliment him on his orange socks. Trade tips if you sit behind him in

      computer class. Show you’re interested.

      Look