Leading from the In-Between. John McAuley

us crossing bridges with emerging leaders.

      Like the basic model, this book is structured around three triads. The first triad is cadence, character and competence. These are the footings we need to form in emerging leaders to anchor their ongoing leadership development. The second triad is mentors, coaches and sages. These are the three roles that, especially woven together, accompany and inspire young people toward a life of exceptional leadership. The final triad is see, stretch and support. These are the strategies we use to help emerging leaders traverse the distance between the reality of their world now and the preferred future they want to build.

      This book is full of real-life stories that express and amplify other theories and research about leadership development for emerging leaders. Some stories come from my early roots, and others are from the more recent past. My leadership model was birthed and operationalized with young people at Muskoka Woods, and much of what I have learned comes from there. Scattered throughout this book are quotes from young people who have participated in Muskoka Woods’ CEO leadership development program. These quotes are from interviews of participants in this program by my colleague Chris Tompkins for his master’s degree research.¹ The stories and quotes help remind us that this book is more about practice than theory. Leadership development plays out in the real lives of real young people, and effective leadership development experiences have to have real consequences. The stories bring those to light.

      All of us operate from a worldview that shapes who we are, and mine is framed by my Christian faith. The Psalms—that beautiful set of biblical poetry of wisdom, confession, lament, thanksgiving and praise—have sustained my leadership over the years. They have given me permission as a leader to say, I’m afraid, I don’t have the answers and I need help. Phil Geldart, founder and chief executive officer of Eagle’s Flight, is one of my most important mentors and has spent hundreds of hours with me, helping me shape my view of leadership development. Early on in our relationship, Phil introduced me to Psalm 78:70–72, which says, “He chose David his servant…and David shepherded them with integrity of heart; [and] with skillful hands.” That verse, which weaves around the ideas of character, competence and cadence, helped me uncover this leadership model.

      I find immense inspiration in the lives of great leaders, but none more than Jesus. Each day I ask myself, am I allowing the beauty and character of Jesus to be reflected in my life and my leadership? After all, who doesn’t want life to the full, where love, joy, peace, kindness and gentleness reign? I am convinced that life is not an accident. We are all created and loved by God. I believe that the best of life happens when we are a living exhibition of life with God.

      My worldview is reflected in this book, but I hope I have expressed it in a way that opens up conversation and connection rather than closing it down. My favourite and most stimulating conversations are usually with people who see life differently than I do.

      Finally, I read very widely on leadership, management and youth development. I am sometimes unaware of when other people’s words have become mine. I have tried my best in this book to give credit to the people who have shaped my ideas. However, if you see something and recognize its source, please send me an email so I can ensure that the people are acknowledged rightly for their work.

      This book is written for people who are pouring their lives and energy into emerging leaders, that fascinating group of young men and women who are living in an in-between stage of life, ripe for growth, learning and inspiration. In a world of leadership books, my hope is that this one not only affirms what you know but also gifts you with something new you haven’t yet discovered.

      John McAuley

       [email protected]

      ¹ For the purpose of anonymity all the names have been changed.

      SECTION I—LEADING FROM THE IN-BETWEEN

      CHAPTER 1—BE THE BRIDGE

      KEY MESSAGES

      •Leaders look at their world and say “It doesn’t have to be this way” and do something about it.

      •The greatest leverage for leadership lies in the “in-between” places.

      •Mentors, coaches and sages develop emerging leaders with character, competence and cadence by seeing, stretching and supporting them.

      GROWING UP IN THE IN-BETWEEN

      I was born in Northern Ireland in 1964 and spent my childhood, youth and early adulthood in Belfast. The early sixties marked the beginning of more than three decades of intense and violent conflict in my hometown. This period is called “The Troubles,” and troubling it was. Northern Ireland was an unwelcome place. We used to tell the joke of a man from India who first gets off the plane in Belfast and is asked, “What’s your religion?” The man responds, “I’m Hindu.” And the Irish interrogator fires back, “Are you a Catholic Hindu or a Protestant Hindu?”

      That was the world of Northern Ireland. It was an environment of Us and Them. Catholics and Protestants. Loyalists and Republicans. Wealthy and poor. Right side and wrong side. There were sharp lines about acceptable beliefs and behaviours, especially in the Church. Some were in. Some were out. No grey.

      I grew up in a Protestant church right on the front lines of it all. The church hall was literally on the Protestant side of the neighbourhood, and the sanctuary was in a Catholic IRA-controlled stronghold. Our services were guarded by a dozen soldiers. Most of the neighbourhood residents were hard-working shipyard factory families. Many of the fathers were absent. Drinking and abuse were common. Young people were easily drawn into the Troubles, and some were tangled up with paramilitary forces. When I was 18, my friend Karen McKeown, an innocent and much respected member of our church, was tragically murdered on the church doorstep in an act of political violence. Her life and her death had a tremendous shaping influence on our church and on me personally.

      That polarization of Us and Them was my world, but somehow my family lived in the “in-between.” They seemed to be able to see across the barriers and even bridge between them. In my house, bigotry was not allowed, and anti-Catholicism was off limits. In the midst of our fractured and working class community, I lived in a comfortable upper-middle-class home with two loving and supportive parents. We were Protestants, but one of my mother’s best friends was a Catholic, and I had a real crush on a young Catholic woman. At that time, churches had rules about things like drinking and smoking and were legalistic, and people were defined by what they did and didn’t do. But my family wasn’t imprisoned by that and seemed to find a way to accept people no matter what side of the line they fell on. We vacationed in the Republic, the south of Ireland, despite the fact it was judged by many to be feeding the enemy. In subtle ways and in direct ways, my family shaped me to be an embracing person. I grew up encouraged to live in the in-between.

      At age 18, I joined the Royal Ulster Constabulary, and I spent four and a half years working as a police officer. For long hours, I would ride in the small space in the back of a police wagon with three other officers. Our lives, literally, depended on each other. Bessbrook station, where I was first assigned, had the unenviable reputation of being the police station that had lost the most officers to death. We were paid to enact justice, mercy and grace—and every day, we would have to make judgments on what that would look like. I quickly realized that many of those decisions were not as black and white as we had so long been told. My culture schooled me on the Protestant versus Catholic divide. But the first time I was shot at, it was in a Protestant stronghold. There may be no quicker way to lose the conviction that one side is always right and one side is always wrong than the sound of a bullet aimed in your direction.

      At age 21, in the midst of my life as a police officer, I had a dramatic experience with God. I turned my back on the self-destructive patterns and partying lifestyle I had developed to deal with the stress, anxiety and trauma of my work. Then, for 18 more months, I sat in that same police wagon with the same