The Bride's Second Thought. Elizabeth August

his eyes. The purpose and resolve she saw there was so powerful it was akin to a physical force. Every instinct told her that this man meant what he said. As the blue of his eyes seemed to engulf her, the thought that he was what she’d waited all her life for flashed through her mind.

      Peter was acutely aware of the way the brown of her eyes was softening. She’s in a vulnerable state right now. he reminded himself. It wouldn’t be right to take advantage of her, and he’d always tried to do what was right. “Did you give him a chance to explain?” he asked curtly.

      “Who? Explain...?” For a moment she’d forgotten about everyone and everything but her host. The intensity of the momentary, unexpected attraction she’d experienced shook her. His sudden aloofness suggested he’d been aware of her reaction and wasn’t pleased. An embarrassed tint reddened her cheeks.

      “Charles,” Peter replied.

      “Charles,” she repeated the name. Her fiancé’s image came sharply back to mind, and anger washed away her embarrassment. Her gaze became icy. “He tried to blame me. Can you believe that? He actually tried to blame me!”

      “He tried to blame you for his affair?” Interesting ploy, Peter mused.

      Her shoulders squared with dignity. “I suppose you’d consider me a throwback to another era, but I was saving myself for marriage.” She caught the glint of surprise in his eyes. “Yes, that’s right. Standing before you is a twenty-nine-year-old virgin. Bet you never thought you’d see one of those in this day and age.”

      “I never really gave it much thought one way or the other.” Peter found himself thinking that she looked kind of cute when she was angry.

      Her jaw tightened in proud defiance. “I figured it was a good path to follow. The consummation of my marriage would be special. In addition, I would also avoid the possibility of contracting AIDS and other undesirable diseases or ending up pregnant out of wedlock.” Her anger flared hotter. “And it hasn’t been easy. I’m not frigid. There have been times when I was tempted.”

      Peter saw the flicker of hurt that passed over her features and knew that behind her anger was the pain of someone who felt betrayed. “A lot of people would consider your decision admirable.”

      “If so, they’re keeping awfully quiet,” she retorted, pacing once again. “Newspapers, television and magazines have the soap box, and the majority of what I read and see wouldn’t support your view.” She breathed a tired sigh. Again approaching the couch, she rested her hands on its back and faced Peter levelly. “But then I’ve never let what anyone else thought determine my course of action. Even after we became engaged I insisted on waiting until our wedding night. I thought it would make the consummation of our love more important somehow.”

      The bitter edge returned to her voice. “He claimed it simply made him frustrated. He said he was a healthy male and needed female companionship. He said it was my fault he had to seek out a different companion.” She straightened, indignation etching into her features. “And do you know who he chose? No, of course you don’t. Well, I’ll tell you. It was the twenty-two-year-old redheaded receptionist from the plant. I’d seen her flirting with Charles, but I trusted him.”

      Peter found himself not liking the role, but he heard himself playing the devil’s advocate. “There is another way to look at this.”

      She glared at him. “And what way is that?”

      “Maybe he’s gotten his cheating out of his system. Better now than after the vows are said.”

      “I can’t believe you’re defending him! Do you men always stick so close together?”

      Peter frowned. “I’m not defending him. I just think that since you obviously care a great deal for him, you should consider all the possibilities.”

      “Cared. Past tense,” she corrected.

      How much he wanted to believe her, stunned him. If you do, you’re a fool, he warned himself. “If you don’t still care, then why are you so upset?” he asked. “Because I feel humiliated! Duped! Made a fool of!”

      He wasn’t convinced. “I think you should relax and get some sleep. Once you’re rested, you’ll be able to think clearer.”

      Ellen stared into the fire. “Maybe I don’t want to think clearer. My mother didn’t say so, but I know she’s worried I’ll never find anyone to marry if I don’t marry Charles, and maybe that same fear is lurking down deep inside of me. It might convince me to overlook Charles’s indiscretion, even if I’m not totally convinced he would remain faithful once we were married.” Her jaw tensed. “I don’t want to be married to a man I can’t trust.”

      “It could be that he’ll realize how much he cares for you and never stray again,” Peter said.

      Ellen breathed a tired sigh. “Maybe.” Having revealed a great deal more about herself than she’d wanted to, she fell silent.

      The man would be a fool if he didn’t, Peter thought. Sensing their conversation had reached its end, he returned his attention to his book. This time, telling himself that his guest was still in love with her fiancé and therefore totally off-limits to any further lustful thoughts, he ordered himself to concentrate on his research.

      Rounding the couch, Ellen sat down and stared into the fire. Bane had woken during the exchange between her and Peter. Now, out of the corner of her eye, she saw that he’d gone back to sleep. That he’d shown no reaction to her display of anger caused her to realize that the wolf had accepted her as a nonthreatening entity. That, at least, was a relief.

      Still, she remained tense as, uninvited, her host’s image filled her mind. She recalled her sudden, very strong, totally surprising attraction for the bearded man. Obviously she was experiencing some sort of rebound reflex, she decided. She’d never thought of herself as the kind of woman whose emotions could bounce so radically, but then, she’d had a shock, catching Charles with Janet and been terrified, thinking that she might freeze to death or be eaten by wolves. It was only natural her emotions were a little out of control.

      Also, she had to admit that Peter wasn’t bad looking in a caveman sort of way. On top of that, he’d saved her life. It was only natural, she’d feel a certain affinity toward him. Just don’t go thinking what you’re feeling is anything more than gratitude, she warned herself. She had enough trouble ahead, sorting out her feelings about Charles. She didn’t need to confuse the issue with a rebound attraction to a stranger.

      Having had this little talk with herself and confident she had her emotions reined in, she still found herself being curious about her host. “What do you do when you aren’t cabin- and wolf-sitting for a friend?”

      Silently Peter groaned. He’d been trying to ignore her, but it was obvious she wasn’t going to make that easy. He looked up.

      She read the impatience in his eyes and felt like a nuisance. “Never mind,” she said with apology. “It’s none of my business.”

      He knew he’d behaved impolitely. But she was a strain on his control. “I travel a lot. I’m a geologist. I go where my work and interests take me,” he informed her, then returned his attention to his book, letting her know he considered this exchange over.

      And you’re not inclined to talk about yourself, she added mentally. Respecting his right to privacy, she closed her eyes and leaned her head back on the couch. The image of her and her host climbing a mountain together began to play through her mind. Scowling, she opened her eyes and glared at the wall above the mantel. Her emotions were in turmoil, and now her mind was traveling absurd paths! Peter was right. She needed some sleep.

      “I’m going to bed,” she announced, abruptly rising. “Good night and thank you for your hospitality.”

      

      Peter read and stoked the fire while he waited for his guest to settle in for the night. It wasn’t until she’d finished in the bathroom, entered the bedroom and closed the door that he relaxed.