Small-Town Girl. C.J. Carmichael

one he’d grown up in.

      “I don’t think you’re being very fair to me,” Julie added.

      “Maybe not,” he conceded. “But I wish you’d at least consider the idea.”

      She propped her head up on her hand. “You haven’t given me much choice. You’ve already quit your job.”

      “Yes.” He should have told Julie first. But nothing she could have said would have changed his mind. He wanted more time with his son. “Since the day Ben was born, he’s fit into our lives so smoothly. Aside from those few months at the beginning—” they’d each taken two months off from work “—we’ve barely had to adjust our lifestyle to accommodate him.

      “Look at us. We both have jobs we love. Ben’s been in before-and-after-school care right from the start. You still run three times a week. I play squash—”

      “We’re not the only working parents in the world. And isn’t it healthy for us to have interests outside the house?”

      “That’s not the point.” He flung off his covers, suddenly hot. “Ben hasn’t asked much of us. He’s been a great kid, a happy kid. But now he needs us. Now—for a few years, at least—it’s time for him to be the focus.”

      “And he isn’t now?”

      “We’ve put our lives on hold since the accident. And yes, we’ve devoted most of our energy to him. But already we’re starting to slip back into our routines….”

      “Don’t you want that? Isn’t that exactly what Ben needs?”

      Russell could see how badly Julie longed for him to agree. He wished he could make her happy and do it. “But Ben can’t go back to being the boy he used to be. Not yet, anyway.”

      Julie dropped her head into her hands. Russell tried to draw her to him, but she resisted.

      “Have you thought about what school is going to be like for him? He won’t be top of the class anymore. He doesn’t even have the stamina to play soccer with his buddies. He’s going to feel like an outsider.”

      “And he won’t be an outsider in Chatsworth?”

      “He’ll be the new kid. There’s a difference. Plus he’ll have more family.” This was a delicate point. Russell was aware of the tension between his mother and his wife. He had no clue why two such wonderful women couldn’t get along. He didn’t dare say this out loud, but he was certain that if only they spent more time together, they’d come around.

      “There’s my side of the family, too.”

      Russell hardly knew her parents or sister; they’d moved back to London before Ben was born. “Are you suggesting we consider relocating to England?”

      “Of course not. It’s just…” She buried her head in her hands again. He wondered if she was crying. But when she finally faced him, her eyes were dry.

      “What if Ben doesn’t want to move to Chatsworth?”

      With that question, Russell knew his plan stood a chance.

      “Let’s ask him in the morning.”

      JULIE WAITED UNTIL RUSSELL fell asleep. Then she slid out of bed and crept down the hall, past their home office, to Ben’s room.

      After the accident, she’d moved an easy chair in here. The first few nights she and Russell had taken turns watching him. Finally Ben had insisted that they stop.

      “I’m fine. You guys worry too much.”

      He always said he was fine, even when it was obvious that he wasn’t. Getting him to take his medication to prevent seizures was often a struggle.

      Julie hovered over her son, listening for the comforting rhythm of his breathing. She touched his hair; his curls were so much softer than Russell’s. Her hand trailed over his cheek, then up to his forehead, to the patch of pink, scarred skin.

      What did the future hold for Ben? He’d come into this world so perfect. She remembered marveling at every wonderful detail, from his ten lovely toes, to his thick cap of hair. He wasn’t perfect anymore. Certainly not on the outside. And on the inside—no one could say. Just because Ben’s EEGs were normal now was no guarantee…

      She’d been allotted a beautiful, flawless son. And under her care he’d been hurt so badly he’d almost died.

      Maybe Russell was right. Maybe their city lifestyle was no longer the best for Ben. One thing she couldn’t argue with: if she’d put Ben first on that thirtieth day of April, none of this would have happened. Her son would still be whole and sound and happy.

      Why hadn’t she appreciated her good fortune when she’d had it? Why hadn’t she realized that a smart, happy, healthy little boy wasn’t just normal—he was a miracle. She’d taken the biggest blessing in her life for granted. And Ben had paid the price.

      Moving to Chatsworth could be her atonement she decided. If she gave up the life that she loved—her job, her friends, her house—maybe Ben would regain all that he’d lost.

      Of course, real life didn’t work that way. But maybe Russell was right. Maybe Chatsworth really would be better for Ben.

      Could she stand to move there? Julie brushed a kiss on Ben’s forehead, then sighed. If her son did indeed want to move, she knew she’d have no choice. She’d go.

      “BEN? YOUR MOTHER AND I were talking about something last night. We’d like to know what you think.”

      “Yeah?” Ben paused in the middle of trying to remove a section of his grapefruit.

      His movements were so awkward it hurt Julie to watch. She ached to take the spoon from his hand and feed him. But Ben struggling through tasks like this was supposed to help him get better.

      “This is just an idea, you understand,” Russell continued. “If you don’t like it, then fine. We’ll forget about it.”

      “What, Dad?”

      Julie wanted to cover her ears. Once the offer was made to Ben, there would be no turning back.

      “We’re thinking of moving. To Chatsworth. Where your grandma and grandpa live.”

      “Yeah?” Ben’s eyes rounded. “Would we live in the same house?”

      “No.” Julie hated how sharp that had sounded. She took a deep breath. “Actually, your father has heard of a house for sale farther down the street.”

      “Is it by the lake?”

      “You bet,” Russell said.

      “Cool. Could we go canoeing and fishing and stuff?”

      Russell laughed. “Exactly.”

      Julie pictured, in that instant, exactly the life Russell wanted for them. Apple pie and roast chicken on Sundays. Long afternoons watching baseball at the diamonds by the lake. Sitting out on the veranda in the evenings, gabbing with passing neighbors.

      It was a lovely life, she supposed, a dream life for many.

      But it wasn’t the life she wanted. Not everyone suited small-town living. She’d grown up in London. To her, Vancouver was already small enough.

      Yet, listen to Ben.

      “We could visit Grandma and Grandpa all the time, right? And could I bring my bike? And what about a dog, Dad? Last time we went to visit Grandma she said every boy needed a dog….”

      He sounded so excited. She hadn’t seen him speak this quickly or look as animated since…

      Since. Everything was “since” now.

      “I don’t know about the dog, Ben. We’ll have to ask your mother.”

      Her fate was sealed. She grabbed the handle of her coffee