No Wife Required!. Rebecca Winters

rather unforgettable. I’m right about this being a first for you, aren’t I?”

      Her jaw hardened. “As a matter of fact you are, where your show is concerned. I’ve called in dozens of times on other shows over the years.”

      “You’ve made my day, Lorraine. The owner of the station loves it when I get a first-time caller. Unfortunately we’re almost out of time.”

      “I’ll make this quick,” she asserted forcefully. “If you want to know what happened to the lovely wife working her nails to the bone at home while she waited for her beloved to return home after a hard day’s work...check with his little girlfriend in town.

      “The one who didn’t have a clue he was married and hoped to become his wife, only to discover too late that the money he’d been spending wining and dining her was the money from his paycheck to support the family, thus forcing his wife to get out and earn a living she could count on!”

      “Were you the wife or the girlfriend?” Max Jarvis insinuated in his deep, vibrant voice before she could catch her breath.

      His question shot home like an arrow to the heart. Afraid to reveal any more, Lacey hung up the phone, still angry that Perry hadn’t told her he was a married man with children until after she’d fallen in love with him. Never again!

      “Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve just lost Lorraine. No doubt her personal story has struck a resounding chord in the breast of those legions of people who’ve lost trust in a loved one. A sign of the times? An explanation for the numbers of married women entering the workforce outside the home?

      “We all commiserate with your loss, Lorraine. If you can ever bring yourself to talk about this again, call in and we’ll discuss it further. Until tomorrow at 3:00 p.m., this is Max Jarvis with Radio Talk. Have a good night.”

      Hot-faced, Lacey got up from the table and turned off the radio. By now George had gone into the living room and was watching television.

      Still fuming because everything Max Jarvis said tended to upset her, she cleaned up the kitchen, then gripped a bulging briefcase to get to work on the accounts for a client who’d opened an extension of his law firm in Idaho.

      By ten o’clock she called it quits but didn’t have the heart to wake George and walk him to his basket in the kitchen. So she left him lying in front of the TV and went into the bathroom for a soak in the tub.

      Maybe the running water wakened him because a few minutes later he suddenly ambled into the bathroom and climbed up on the hamper.

      “George? I thought you were out for the count. Did you miss me?”

      George cocked his head to the side engagingly.

      “Did I tell you we’re leaving on our trip to Idaho Falls day after tomorrow? Just you and me and the wide open spaces. We’ll sleep along the way and do whatever we feel like. Of course, you have to remember I have work to do. We can’t fool around all the time.”

      She studied him while he displayed a splendid set of yellow teeth. Lorraine had been training him to be an aide to an other-abled person. George had the capacity to do a variety of tedious tasks a human would never tolerate.

      “So you want to play now, do you?” She chuckled as he jumped down and came over to the side of the tub, tentatively stirring his hand in the water. “Well, I’m afraid you’re going to have to wait. And don’t look at me like that with those sorrowful brown eyes. I want to relax for a while first. Then it will be your turn.”

      George scurried out of the bathroom and came back with his red ball. He threw it in the water.

      “That was naughty,” she said with mock severity. “Now you can’t have it until tomorrow morning. Sulk all you want, but it won’t do you any good.” She laughed as he covered his eyes with his hands in exaggerated fashion. He was such an endearing little ham. Obedient, too. He didn’t make another attempt to get the ball.

      “You know—you’re not as hairy as I’d imagined. I wonder what it is about you that Lorraine can’t tolerate? How sad if she really is allergic to you. Thank goodness you and I took to each other without any problem.

      “I’ve loved having you around, even if you’re too curious for your own good. In ways I would like to keep you, but even if that were possible, someone else needs you desperately, and you’re far too expensive.” The responsibility of caring for a fifty-thousand-dollar monkey had been weighing on her from the outset.

      Lacey patted his silky head as she got out of the tub and hitched a towel around her. “You miss Lorraine, don’t you? But you like living with me a little bit, right?” He looked at the water wistfully, then back at her.

      “I know what you want. All right. Go ahead.”

      George leaped into the tub, rolling his ball over and over again, jumping up and down, splashing water.

      “Careful, George. You’re getting me wet again. Let’s keep everything to the confines of the tub. You’re too excited. Now calm down. You act like this is the first time. You know the rules.”

      Lacey couldn’t keep a straight face. Laughter spilled out of her, which only incited him to more antics. He beat on his chest.

      “You’re too much, do you know that? Come on. Play time is over. You’ve worn me out. Let’s go to bed and sleep till noon. Then we have to clean because Brad’s boss from Denver will be flying in to Salt Lake some time tomorrow afternoon on his way to Tokyo. You’ll have to stay in the storeroom out of sight. I’ll bring you a pillow and your blanket. After he’s in bed, I’ll come out to see you.”

      As she leaned over to let the water out of the tub, she could’ve sworn she heard the clank of metal followed by a low groan. It had to have come from the bathroom next door. George looked at the wall, then at her. He’d heard the noise, too.

      “Uh-oh,” she whispered. “I think my neighbor is trying to tell us something. We’d better not play in the middle of the night anymore or we might be evicted.”

      Lacey fell into bed exhausted, but Saturday turned out to be even more tiring. George made house cleaning an unforgettable experience. He followed her around and found the vacuum an unending source of delight.

      Lorraine had assured her he was capable of vacuuming, it was part of his training. Though he might not be as thorough as a human, he knew to cover the open areas of the floor.

      Lacey decided to let him do the carpet in the master bedroom while she finished the dusting and polishing in the living room. With the plants watered, all she had to do was make up the guest bedroom with clean sheets and scour the bathroom.

      Not wanting to miss any of the noon news, she carried her radio to the bathroom and plugged it in while she attacked the tub. As soon as George heard the radio, he turned off the vacuum and scuttled into the bathroom to admire himself in the mirror, which covered one whole wall.

      It was a good thing she hadn’t cleaned the glass yet. Lacey grinned as she watched him kiss the mirror with his mobile lips. She figured he was a normal monkey and missed the companionship of a mate.

      It was anyone’s guess if his face made him attractive to the female of the species, but she thought him a terrific specimen. Apparently he did, too. He leaned on the knuckles of his hands and scrutinized himself from head to toe.

      Lacey got up from her knees and turned off the radio. In her opinion, the Saturday real estate news show had to be the most boring segment of Radio Talk. At least if Max Jarvis had been hosting it, she could have enjoyed his voice.

      She eyed George affectionately. “Mirror, mirror on the wall. Who’s the handsomest of all?” George bared his teeth in a huge grin now that he had her full attention.

      “You know you’re gorgeous, don’t you? But there’s no need to overdo it. I’m already in love with you, you big ape. Now run along while I finish cleaning. With you in here, I can’t get my work done. You’re far and away the most entertaining