The Yummy Mummy’s Survival Guide. Liz Fraser

Drink lots of water: It makes the image better, because a full bladder pushes the baby closer to the ultrasound thingy…

      

Wear some beautiful knickers: They will be seen.

      

Check your bikini line: They make you pull your knickers down very low, and it will just make the nurse’s day if there are no wayward hairs sticking out. Eeek.

      

Bring some cash: Trying to pay for a baby photo with a credit card won’t work, and you only get one chance to buy one.

      

Tell the scan-lady (or man) if you want to see the screen better: They are usually very kind, and will turn the monitor round for you to see everything. Otherwise you end up with a cricked neck as well as a belly covered in jelly.

      

Ask if you can’t identify anything: The image from an ultrasound is very dark and confusing, and unless you are used to looking at such things, it may look like nothing but black and grey blobs. Don’t lie there saying, ‘Oh yes! I can see her tiny fingers’, when really you could be looking at her earlobe for all you know. Ask, and ye shall learn.

      Try not to think about having a scan as a way of finding all sorts of things wrong with your baby. A lot of people get really worked up about scans, but they are usually just a great chance to see your baby for the first time, and to make the pregnancy feel more real. Very, very real, in fact. Yikes!

      Come Fly With Me (while you still can)

      If this is your first pregnancy, then please trust me on this one: travelling will never be as easy or enjoyable as it is now, so GO ON HOLIDAY and enjoy yourselves while the going’s good. If you don’t, and you duck out because you can’t be bothered, feel too tired, or don’t look nice in a bikini any more, you will regret it forever, and really annoy me because I’d love to go, thanks very much.

      If possible, fly away somewhere beautiful, because this will be the most tricky form of transport once the baby arrives, and you can get somewhere much more exotic on a plane. Flying short distances is perfectly safe for your baby and cabin pressure, dry air and ugly seat-covers won’t harm it. Do tell your doctor before you go though, because everyone has different medical circumstances…

      TOP SURVIVAL TIPS for pregnant travellers:

      

Fly before you are 28 weeks pregnant. After this, some insurance companies get a bit panicky, and either refuse to insure you at all, or require a letter from your doctor confirming your due date.

      

Carry your travel medical insurance with you at all times.

      

Take your medical notes with you.

      

Drink lots more water than usual to combat swollen feet and ankles, and to stave off dehydration.

      

Go to the loo every time you see one.

      

Walk about even more than usual on a flight, to prevent varicose veins, backache, thrombosis and so on.

      

Learn how to say ‘pregnant’ in the language of the country you’re going to. ‘Stop staring at my big stomach’ is also handy.

      

Don’t go scuba diving, or use saunas or hot jacuzzis.

      

Go to the British Insurance Brokers Association if you are having trouble getting travel insurance.

       Health Matters

      Yes it does, and here are some.

      As well as what you eat, drink, do and think, there are yet more things which could affect your pregnancy, and which you should be aware of. Because we’d hate any pregnant ladies to be having too much fun, wouldn’t we…

       Gardening

      Assuming you can still bend down and reach some soil and filth, then wearing gloves and washing your hands thoroughly afterwards is essential. Earth contains parasites which can cause toxoplasmosis, which in turn can cause brain damage to the foetus, or even a miscarriage. If you let these get under your nails and into your mouth, you could be in real trouble.

       Pets

      If you still have a pet, then try to get rid of it as soon as possible. Ok, obviously don’t really do that, but you might like to spend a few minutes honestly trying to think how manageable this will be soon: a baby is quite enough for most new mums to handle, without also having to feed the goldfish, clean out the hamster or take the Labrador for long walks. In the meantime, being near animals is not a good idea when you are pregnant, because they carry all sorts of bugs and nasties, which are potentially very harmful to a Yummy Foetus, for example toxoplasmosis, chlamydia, listeria, E. coli and salmonella. It’s also not a good idea to visit a zoo, a farm or a vet. The worst domestic offender is the cat litter tray, and if you must clean it out then dress like a bee-keeper and wash your entire body thoroughly with TCP afterwards.

       Medication

      If you are on any, your doctor should have gone through whether you can carry on taking it while you are expecting. If you have to take some medicine at some point, make sure it’s OK to.

      A small problem: Almost everything carries a ‘do not take this if you are, or think you might be pregnant’ warning in case somebody drinks an entire bottle of Night Nurse and sues the pharmaceutical company when her baby has three heads. This makes it impossible to know whether something really is potentially harmful, or if there’s virtually no risk at all unless you are armed with common sense. If you truly believe that taking one Nurofen for the headache you’ve had for two days will do more harm to your baby than the stress your headache is causing you, then you must carry on suffering.

      Definite no-nos: aspirin (it thins the blood), ibuprofen, decongestants containing ephedrine.

      Safe medicines: paracetamol (hooray!), antacids containing magnesium or aluminium, and most other over-the-counter medicines, but ask first!

       External Factors

      These include working in a smoky atmosphere, being very trigger-happy with the bleach, living under the M4, painting all your walls in leaded paint, and other such nasty things. Try to avoid inhaling, ingesting or spending a lot of time hanging around any nasty chemical or biological substances, which could pass into your blood, and then into your baby.