The Little Book Café. Georgia Hill

I’ll never need you because, Kit, unlike you with your donkeys for company, I’ve got the perfect life.’ A shudder rippled through her. ‘And now, if you’d let me, I’d quite like to get back to it.’ She stomped off, bumping into a family with a Labrador on the way. The dogs’ leads got entangled for a moment, thoroughly spoiling her attempt at a dramatic exit. When she’d freed Benji she looked back to where Kit stood. He’d gone.

       Chapter 22

      ‘Where have you been?’ An ashen-faced Adrian met her at the door. He ran a hand through his hair, leaving it sticking up on end. ‘I’ve been worried sick.’

      ‘I took Benji out for a walk. Didn’t you hear me? I shouted where I was going.’

      ‘I didn’t hear anything, Natasha. I had my music on. You’ve been gone for hours, darling.’ He followed her as she took an exhausted Benji through to the utility room and gave him some water. ‘I tried your mobile but you had it switched off. Natasha, I insist you stop fussing over that dog and talk to me!’

      ‘I told you where I was going, Ade. I didn’t hear any music playing when I left.’ Tash blew her fringe off her hot face. She was in no mood to deal with Adrian.

      ‘Well, of course not.’ Adrian huffed irritably. ‘I had headphones on.’

      ‘Not much I could have done to make you hear, then.’

      ‘You could have come into the study. I was really worried, Natasha.’

      Tash felt the burn of Kit’s kiss on her lips. ‘Yes, I could have done. Sorry.’ She was exhausted. Still smarting from Kit’s words, she didn’t want an argument with another man and hadn’t the energy for a mental dance around Adrian’s moods. A pang of guilt shot through her. ‘Look on the bright side, I’ve walked Benji further than he’s been in years so he’ll sleep like a baby tonight.’ She took his arm and led him through to the kitchen. ‘How about we make do with a pizza tonight? I’ll make a nice salad and we can open a bottle of Rioja. Have a lazy night in front of the TV.’

      Adrian smiled, mollified. ‘That sounds good.’ He took her by the arms. ‘I’m sorry I get so het up. It’s just that I love you so much. I worry about you.’ He wrapped her in his arms. ‘I want to know where you are every minute of the day. Every second. Every millisecond.’

      ‘I don’t know what you think might happen to me in Berecombe, Ade.’ She tensed for his reaction then, to her relief, felt a ripple of a laugh go through him.

      ‘I know. I’m a silly old man.’ He kissed her. ‘Did you see the Red Arrows go over? Did they frighten the dog?’

      Tash disentangled herself. She hunted in the dresser for a couple of glasses, hiding her burning face behind the cupboard door. Guilt gnawed at her insides. Why couldn’t she just tell him the truth? That she’d bumped into friends and watched the display with them. And then had launched herself at one of them and kissed him. She screwed up her eyes. ‘Yes, I had a good view of the planes. They were fantastic as usual. Be an angel and fetch a bottle of wine from the garage, will you? I forgot to get a new one out.’

      Adrian came to her again. He kissed her cheek. ‘Honestly, what would you do if you didn’t have me to look after you? You can be so disorganised sometimes.’ He went out humming, happy to be useful.

      Tash went to the window and looked out at the garden. She clung onto the icy sides of the Belfast sink, willing the cold porcelain to shock her senses. She and Adrian had spent weeks finding just the right one and even longer hunting down the taps to go with it. This kitchen was her pride and joy. She took immense pleasure in the black granite work surfaces, in the state of the art NEFF oven, in the gadgets that she and Adrian had collected but rarely had time to use. He loved her. He really loved her. Look at what they’d created together. Then why was it now flawed? If she was able to kiss another man, to contemplate going much further, then what was the future for her and Adrian? Thoughts of Kit filled her. Consumed her. The very core of her being ached for him. She hardly knew Kit and yet he’d managed to sum her up after a few weeks’ acquaintance. She concentrated on her breathing then splashed cold water over her face. This was her life. Her perfect life. This house and Adrian was all she’d ever wanted. And it was no longer enough. Adrian was no longer enough.

      When he returned she greeted him with a smile.

      The evening passed companionably. Adrian had drawn the line at the dog coming into the sitting room. When Benji woke them in the middle of the night howling, Adrian was too stupefied by wine, an Americano and a bout of vigorous sex to complain too much.

      After seeing to the dog, Tash lay wide awake, staring at the ceiling. She didn’t know herself any more.

       Chapter 23

      ‘Oh, hello Benji,’ Emma crooned. She got up to help Tash with the dog bed. ‘We’ll put you just here, shall we?’ She took the bed off Tash and put it in the back corner of the office. Bending down she stroked his ears. ‘You won’t be any trouble at all, will you?’

      ‘Do you think this will be alright?’ Tash flung her briefcase onto her desk and went through to the kitchen to stow Benji’s supplies. ‘It doesn’t look very professional. Having a dog in the workplace, I mean,’ she shouted through. ‘Adrian said it might lose us clients.’

      ‘I think it makes us look friendlier,’ Emma replied, stoutly. ‘Besides, Berecombe’s known to be dog-friendly and all the tourists come in with theirs. If anyone is really bothered we can always put him in the kitchen.’

      ‘Poor Benji. He’s being pushed from pillar to post. He had us up both nights at the weekend. He’s just not used to sleeping on his own. Mum lets him sleep on her bed.’

      ‘And I expect Adrian won’t tolerate that.’

      ‘No need to be snippy.’ Tash returned and collapsed onto her chair. ‘You’re right though. Ade won’t hear of Benji being anywhere in the house apart from the garden and the utility. He must be so lonely. Mum dotes on him, spoils him rotten.’ The little dog trotted up to her and rested his nose on her knee. ‘I’d live at Mum and Dad’s while they’re away but Adrian won’t hear of it.’

      ‘I bet he won’t.’

      ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

      ‘He does like to keep tabs on you, doesn’t he?’

      Tash thought about defending him and decided she didn’t have the energy. ‘You’re right. He does. But it’s only because he cares so much.’

      ‘Hmph.’ Emma went into the kitchen and clicked on the kettle. ‘You’ve got to have space though, Tash.’

      ‘Like you and Ollie, you mean?’

      Emma poked her head around the door. ‘Oi. Nothing wrong with my relationship, thank you.’

      Tash hadn’t had enough sleep for an argument. ‘Nothing that Aidan Turner wouldn’t solve.’

      Emma grinned. ‘Think that man would solve anything.’ She disappeared. ‘But only dressed as Ross Poldark.’ She returned with a packet of crisps. ‘Breakfast?’ She offered Tash one.

      Tash shuddered. ‘How can you eat cheese and onion at this hour?’ As the phone began to ring, she added, ‘And don’t give any to Benji!’ She picked up the receiver. ‘Oh, hello Ade. Yes, of course I got to work alright. Why?’

      Emma rolled her eyes and crunched her way through the crisps while waiting for Tash to finish on the phone. Making faces at Benji, she slipped him the tiniest morsel. When Tash put the receiver down, she exclaimed, ‘I can’t believe he rang you. You’ve only just left the house!’