The Cosy Teashop in the Castle: The bestselling feel-good rom com of the year. Caroline Roberts

Kirsty at the café. She’d surely have some idea.

      She could speak with Joe, but she didn’t warm to the latter idea, not wanting to appear inept before she even got started. She didn’t want him to regret his decision to back her.

      One wall scrubbed and finished, Ellie was on tiptoes by the window, trying to get a signal on her mobile phone.

      ‘Hi there, Kirsty.’

      ‘Ellie, is that you? Hi, how’s it all going out in the sticks? Are you up and running yet?’

      ‘Friday’s D-Day. Look, are you busy? I just need a bit of advice.’

      ‘No, I’m okay for a sec. My customers are all served. Fire away.’

      ‘It’s the ordering – likely numbers I’m catering for, what to buy in? I haven’t a flippin’ clue. I can’t believe I’m such a numpty.’ She could hear her mother’s warning tones, I told you so, running in her ears.

      ‘Ok-ay,’ even Kirsty sounded as though she wondered what the hell Ellie had taken on. ‘Right, well, look you’ve got to get an idea of numbers of customers to start. Decide on your menu, and then I can help with what to order. But yeah, numbers, bums on seats … Did you get any paperwork or accounts when you applied? Can you get figures now?’

      ‘Umn, well I have the accounts. The Easter figures looked pretty good, but how the hell do you convert pounds profit into how many bloody jacket potatoes and cakes sold?’

      ‘Hmn, right. Well, they must take a record of visitors to the castle, surely? If I were you, I’d ask if they have some idea how many people tend to call in at the tearooms. It’s worth a try, and should give you some indication at least.’

      ‘Yeah, I suppose so.’

      ‘And buy in stuff that won’t spoil too quickly or can freeze. You can even freeze some of the cakes if need be, as soon as you’ve baked them, so they’re nice and fresh. Take them out as you need.’

      ‘Okay, that sounds a good idea.’

      ‘Oh, hang on … Yes, sorry, a latte … and a cappuccino, no problems. If you just take a seat I’ll bring them over … Ellie, sorry, I’m going to have to go. Ring me back in a while, and try and get that info.’

      ‘Will do, thanks.’ Right, she needed to have a word with Joe, or maybe Deana. It looked like Deana took the admissions for the castle; her office was right on the main gate. Ellie was seeing Joe shortly anyhow, but how could she confess to not having a clue about the ordering? Oh well, she’d scrub the next kitchen wall, that’d be two out of the four done, and then make herself a cup of tea. She’d take five minutes time out to think carefully, and write down a list of everything she needed to ask Joe, to get herself organised. Ooh, and she’d have a look and see what kind of freezer and fridge storage they had. She’d noticed a couple of big chest freezers out in the corridor as well as the one in the kitchen; they must be to do with the tearooms.

      She went out to the hallway. Jeez! They hardly needed freezers out here, it was bitterly cold. She opened the lid of one of them. Jesus Christ! What the hell was that? She dropped the lid down in shock, pinching her finger in the seal. ‘Shit!’ Then raised it slowly again, just a few centimetres, peering in tentatively. Well, that certainly wasn’t loaves of bread or spare milk!

      Antlers – it was friggin’ antlers! Attached to fur and a head. Some poor deer, by the looks of it, its head sealed in a clear plastic bag. What the hell? It made her feel sick. Bambi’s bloody dad was stuck in her freezer. What was with this place and deer? Ice Age Bambi on steroids in the tearooms and now this. At least it wasn’t a human body, she mused. Well, that was certainly going on Joe’s list for the one o’clock meeting: freezer space, why the hell is there a beheaded deer in what I presume is one of the tearoom freezers, and please can it be removed to make way for my paninis and spare milk? Back to the task in hand. The disinfectant was beginning to smart her eyes by the end of the third wall. She was sure she’d reek of it. She was going to mop the lino floors with some bleach next, and then she’d have another cup of tea and add some more to that list.

      Deana popped her head around the door. ‘Hi, Ellie, how’s it all going?’

      ‘Not bad thanks. I’m on a major cleaning session.’ She clambered down off her ladder, happy to have a short break. Ellie mentioned the visitor records. It was a relief to find they did take that information, and Deana promised to get it ready for her in time for her meeting with Joe. One hurdle over at least. But she had a feeling there were going to be plenty more.

      ‘Have you got time for a quick cuppa?’ Ellie offered.

      ‘Only if you have, pet. Looks like you’ve got a lot on.’

      ‘Well, five minutes won’t hurt, and I was ready for a cup anyhow. I’m parched and my tongue tastes of disinfectant.’

      ‘Okay, then. Thank you.’

      Ellie popped the kettle on and set out a teapot for the brew.

      ‘Deana, do they have any strange habits here I should know about?’ She was still thinking about Bambi’s dad out in the corridor.

      ‘Oh, yes, for sure. Lord Henry’s often a little quirky, but are there any particular ones you’re interested in?’ Deana had a wry grin on her face.

      ‘The freezer, that’s all. There’s something unusual in there.’

      ‘Oh God! He’s not saving stuff for the bloody taxidermist again, is he? What’s he got in there this time?’

      Ellie wasn’t even sure what a taxidermist was – not someone who gave you a lift anyhow, but she had a feeling Deana knew exactly what was going on.

      ‘Animal?’

      ‘Yep.’

      ‘Which?’

      ‘Deer. A stag I think.’

      ‘Ah, it’ll be for stuffing and wall-mounting, not my kind of thing. But each to their own. It’s a country, hunting thing. But I’ve told him before not to use the bloody tearoom freezers. It probably didn’t fit in his own, that’s all.’

      Hunting trophies. Collecting animal heads. That was just weird. Country life was certainly odd!

      They had a quick cup of tea and a nice chat, Deana mentioning some of the other castle workers who she might meet in the coming days. Then she said she’d better be getting on, and leave Ellie in peace.

      ‘Just give me a shout if you need anything, though. Ring a nine for the office.’

      ‘Okay, thanks, Deana. Will do.’

      Then Ellie set herself away with the mop and bucket once more.

      It was five to one, and she realised she hadn’t had any lunch and her whole body was aching. She still had the two ovens to clean, the microwave, and then all the working surfaces needed a thorough going-over with antibacterial spray. But it’d have to wait till later in the afternoon now. She needed to see Joe – armed with her million and one questions. She peeled off her rubber gloves, already with a sticky leak in the right index fingertip, and set off across the courtyard, up the stairs, past her own room and up again.

      Standing before the Private Keep Out sign, it dawned on her, unfortunately just after she had knocked, that she was wearing an old tracksuit sporting bleach marks and her hair was scraped back in a ponytail. Damn.

      His ‘Come in’ was formal. He was on the phone as she went in, so she took the seat opposite him quietly and looked around the room, pretending not to be listening in. It was more modern than Lord Henry’s office, the desk more like something from Ikea than the Georgian period. The room was tidy, there was a small grey-and-brown tartan sofa set to one side, the desk with in-tray, laptop, phone and pen, his black leather chair, and another comfy black chair where she sat down. The shelves on the back wall held a neat selection of books: Business Management, Stately and Country Homes, a few crime