The Impact of You. Kendall Ryan

beer bottles and cigarettes butts.

      ‘Why not?’

      ‘It makes you do stupid things,’ Avery says after several long moments.

      I simply nod. She has no idea how close to home that statement hits. Did she do stupid things in her past, or is she basing that on the actions of the people inside?

      ‘Why are you out here?’ she asks.

      ‘I needed some air. What about you?’

      ‘The same, I guess.’ She attempts a smile, but I can tell she’s just as out of practice at it as I am.

      There’s something sad about her eyes, and it makes me want to kick the ass of whoever put that look there. Was it some drunk jerk that hurt her? Maybe that’s why she doesn’t like alcohol.

      ‘I took last semester off,’ I say, trying to keep the conversation going. ‘And even though I live in a frat house, I guess I’m not ready for the start of the new semester party.’

      She looks over at me. ‘You’re a Delta Sig?’

      I nod, glad that she doesn’t ask why I took last semester off.

      She looks back out into the yard and releases a deep sigh.

      This girl is different, and I’m completely thrown off my game. But I kind of like it. She refuses to drool all over me, and I respect her for that. I hate when girls who know nothing about me act as if we’re freaking soul mates. It’s such a turn off. But Avery seems different. I want to know her.

       Avery

      Jase remains silent beside me, and I can sense there’s something more on his mind than just escaping the party inside – only I have no idea what it is, or why he’s chosen me as company. I grin to myself thinking Madison will be proud that I’m out here talking to the Pretty Boy. And pretty, he is. It’s almost too much to handle having him this close and personal. He smells freakin’ incredible too, like a hint of spicy cologne and a trace of laundry detergent. I want to bury my nose in his neck and inhale, get closer to that delicious scent. Of course I do no such thing.

      ‘What’s the most interesting thing about you?’ he asks suddenly.

      I am so not telling him that. His question is an odd one, but I go with it. ‘I was adopted.’

      ‘Really?’ His gaze flicks to mine.

      Whenever I tell people, their eyes light up in wonder, like I’m suddenly special, different. I don’t know if they expect me to be from some cool foreign country, or maybe have celebrities as parents, but the truth is nothing like that. ‘Not from anywhere interesting. Just Colorado.’

      ‘That’s cool. Have you ever been back to visit?’

      ‘Nope. My dads wanted to take me there as a graduation present, but I don’t know…’ I shrug. ‘I’d convinced them I didn’t want to go. I actually did. Desperately. But I felt guilty for wanting to. They got uncomfortable whenever I brought up anything about my birthmom, as if they thought they weren’t enough for me,’ I finish. I have no idea why I’m unloading all this on a guy I just met. It seems Pretty Boy possesses the rare ability to coax the truth from me. Not good.

      To his credit though, Jase doesn’t react at all to the two dads thing. He just nods and continues picking at the fraying string on his jeans, like he’s listening thoughtfully, both to the things I’m saying and what I’m not saying.

      The truth is I’d never met my birthmom, but I’d always wanted to. Depending on the mood I was in, I would picture my mom as an elegant model, or during the tougher times of dealing with my adoption, as a homeless bag-lady.

      My first impression of Pretty Boy Jase when I watched him inside with the blond was that he was your typical party-loving frat boy. Now, watching him silently pick at the hem of his jeans, I’m not so sure. He seems more comfortable sitting out here in the dark than being inside with his friends.

      ‘So, what’s the most interesting thing about you?’ I ask, returning his strange question. He chuckles softly, the timbre of his deep voice rolling over me like a seductive wave. ‘Hmm.’ He considers my question for a moment, looking up at the sky. ‘I don’t know. But I kind of want to find out, you know?’

      I nod. What a pair we make sitting out here alone in the dark. I’m running from my past, and he’s trying to discover his future. Either way, it seems we’re both over the idea of pointless partying. As the bash rages on inside, I find solace in the knowledge that I’m not alone.

       Jase

      I need to direct the attention back to her before I say something stupid. And the way her bright green eyes gaze into mine, who knows what I could admit to if pushed. ‘So why are you really out here hiding?’

      Her eyes flick nervously to mine, like I’ve uncovered some big secret. Only I have no clue what it is. Avery straightens her shoulders and lets out a sigh. ‘I’m not hiding. I just needed a break.’

      She acts like being at a party is work, but I can’t argue. I’d rather be out here with her too. For a moment she watches me from the corner of her eye. Rather than stare at her like I want to, I continue picking at the blade of grass I’ve pulled from the ground.

      ‘Why are you bored with life?’ she asks.

      She has no way of knowing the truth behind her words. Before I can respond, the door opens behind us, blasting us with an unwelcome wave of music. Avery and I both turn to see who’s interrupted our hideout.

      It’s Trey. Shit fuck. He staggers toward us, his eyes dancing between me and Avery with interest. ‘Stacia’s looking for you,’ he announces.

      I cringe as Avery’s eyebrows raise, no doubt wondering who Stacia is.

      ‘I’m busy right now.’

      Trey continues, ‘Come back inside, man. I need you to divert some of the pussy you attract over to me.’ He takes a deep chug from his cup. ‘Hell, I’ll even take your leftovers.’ His eyes dart to Avery’s. ‘And considering this one’s still talking to you, I’m guessing you haven’t fucked her yet.’

      Avery cringes at his words, and in two seconds flat I’m on my feet.

       Avery

      Jase stands suddenly and shoves a hand against his friend’s shoulder, hard enough to knock him back several steps. ‘Go back inside, Trey. Drunk ass,’ he mutters to himself.

      Trey drags himself back inside, but his visit is a wake-up call. I really shouldn’t be sitting alone in the dark with a guy I don’t know. A guy who, according to his friend, definitely knows his way around a vagina. That’s the last thing I need. When I stand, I see disappointment cross Jase’s features.

      ‘I’m gonna go,’ I say.

      He nods and watches me leave, his hands fisted tightly at his sides.

      Back inside, the heat and music are too much. I find Madison and Noah where I left them in the living room, still dancing, only drunker than before. I tug on Madison’s arm. ‘Hey!’ I shout over the music. ‘I’m ready to go.’

      She stops dancing to frown at me, but doesn’t argue. ‘Okay.’ She grabs Noah’s hand. ‘Noah-baby, come on!’

      He grins, as easy going as ever, and follows us to the front door. I steal one last glance behind me and spot Jase situated on the couch, a different blond perched in his lap, his hands by his sides, doing nothing to stop the lap dance. His expression is bored, and when his eyes find mine, he frowns.

      ‘Let’s go.’ I tug Madison, more forcefully this time, and we head out into the night. I hate the feeling of Jase’s eyes on my back as I retreat. I hate that I thought we shared something outside.

      When we reach the dorm, Noah follows Madison and me into our room, which has become a common occurrence.