The Flashman Papers: The Complete 12-Book Collection. George Fraser MacDonald

always known she had a slate loose, and was incapable of seeing farther than her pretty nose – which reminded me to kiss it, tenderly – but this was beyond belief. We were prisoners in this heathen h--l-hole, and to hear her you might have imagined it was a holiday at Brighton. Slowly it dawned on me that she had no true notion of the ghastliness of our plight, or even of what Madagascar was like at all, and as she babbled I began to understand why.

      “… of course, I should like to see more of the country, for the people seemed not disagreeable, but the Prince informs me that the position of foreigners here is delicate, and it is not advisable for me to be seen abroad. For you, of course, it is different, since you are employed by her majesty – oh, tell me, Harry, what she looks like, and what she says! How does she dress? Shall I be presented? Is she young and well-favoured? I should be so jealous – for she cannot fail to be attracted by the handsomest man in England! Oh, Harry, I much admire your uniform – it is quite the style!”

      I’d taken advantage of the custom of the country to wear all red, with a black sash, pretty raffish, I admit. Elspeth fairly glowed at me.

      “But I have so much to tell you, for the Prince and Princess have been so good, and I have the prettiest rooms, and the garden is so beautiful, and there is some very select company in the evenings – all black, of course, and a leetle outré – but most agreeable and considerate. I am most happy and interested – but when shall we go home to England, Harry? I hope it is not too long – for I sometimes feel anxiety for dear Papa, and while it is very pleasant here, it is not quite the same. But I know you will not detain us here longer than must be, for you are the kindest of husbands – but I am sure your work here will be of the greatest service to you, for it is sure to be a valuable experience. I only wish” – her lip suddenly trembled, despite her efforts to smile – “that we could be together again … in the same house … oh, Harry, darling, I miss you so!”

      And the little clothhead began piping her eye, leaning on my shoulder – as though she had anything worth weeping about! It was a d----d letdown, for I’d been looking forward to pouring out my woes and complaints to her, bemoaning my lot, describing the horrors of my plight – the respectable bits, anyway – and generally making her flesh creep with my anxieties. But there seemed no point now in alarming her – she’d just have done something idiotic, and with the others almost in earshot, the less I said the better. So I just patted her shoulder to cheer her up.

      “Now then, old girl,” says I, “don’t be a fool. What’ll their highnesses think of your bleating and bawling? Wipe your nose – you’re a lot better off than some, you know.”

      “I know. I am very foolish,” says she, sniffing, and presently, when the Prince and Princess withdrew, she was all smiles again, curtseying like billy-ho, and kissing me a tender farewell. I remarked to Laborde as we returned to the palace that my wife seemed happily ignorant of my predicament, and he turned his steady eyes on me.

      “It is as well, is it not? She could be a great danger to you – to both of you. The less she knows, the better.”

      “But in G-d’s name, man! She’ll have to find out sooner or later! What then? What when she realizes that she and I are slaves in this frightful country – that there’s no hope – no escape?” I grabbed his arm – we had left our sedans at the entrance to my quarters at the rear of the palace, Fankanonikaka having parted from us at the main gate. “For the love of heaven, Laborde – there must be a way out of this! I can’t go on drilling niggers and piling into that black slut for the rest of my life—”

      “Your life will last no time at all if you don’t control yourself!” snaps he, pulling loose. He glanced round, anxiously, then took a deep breath. “Look you – I will do whatever I can. In the meantime, you must be discreet. I do not know what can be achieved. But the Prince was pleased with you today. That may mean something. We shall see. Now I must go – and remember, be careful. Do your work, say nothing. Who knows?” He hesitated, and tapped me quickly on the arm. “We may drink café au lait on the Champs Elysées yet. À bientôt.”

      And he was off, leaving me staring, mystified – but with something stirring inside me that I hadn’t felt in months: hope.

       Chapter 11

      It didn’t stir for long, of course; it never does. You hear news, or a rumour, or an enigmatic remark like Laborde’s, and your imagination takes wing with wild optimism – and then nothing happens, and your spirits plunge, only to revive for a spell, and then down again, and up and down, while time slips away almost unnoticed. I’m glad I ain’t one of these cool hands who can take a balanced view, for any logical appraisal of my situation in Madagascar would have driven me to suicide. As it was, my alternate hopes and glooms were probably my salvation, as the months went by.

      For it was months – six of them, although looking back it’s hard to believe it was more than a few weeks. Memory may hold on to horrid incidents, but it’s a great obliterator of dull, protracted misery, especially if you help it with heavy drinking. There’s a fine potent aniseed liquor on Madagascar, and I sopped it up like a country parson, so between sleep and stupor I don’t suppose I was in my wits more than half the time.

      And as I’ve remarked, when needs must, you just carry on with the work in hand, so I drilled and bullied my troops, and attended the Queen when called upon, and warily enlarged my circle of acquaintances among the senior military, and cultivated Mr Fankanonikaka, and found out everything I could that might serve when the time came – if it ever did … but it must, it must! For while with every passing week my servitude in Madagascar began to seem more natural and inevitable, there would be moments of sudden violent reaction, as when I’d just seen Elspeth, or been appalled by some new atrocity of the Queen’s, or the musky wood and dust smell grew unbearable in my nostrils, and then there was nothing for it but to walk out alone on the parade ground before Antan’ and stare at the distant mountains, and tell myself fiercely that Lord’s was still over there somewhere with Felix bowling his slow lobs while the crowd clapped and the rooks cawed in the trees; there would be green fields, and English rain, parsons preaching, yokels ploughing, children playing, cads swearing, virgins praying, squires drinking, whores rogering, peelers patrolling – that was home, and there must be a road to it.

      So I kept my eye skinned and learned … that Tamitave, while it had taken days to cover on the slave-march, was a bare hundred and forty miles away; that foreign ships put in about twice a month – for Fankanonikaka, whose office I visited a good deal, used to receive notice of them … the Samson of Toulon, the Culebra of Havana, the Alexander Hamilton of New York, the Mary Peters of Madras – I saw the names, and my heart would stop. They might only anchor in the roads, to exchange cargo – but if I could time my bolt from Antan’ precisely, and reach Tamitave when a foreign vessel was in … I’d swum ashore, I could swim aboard – then let ’em try to get me on their cursed land again! How to reach Tamitave, though, ahead of pursuit? The army had some horses, poor screws, but they’d do – one to ride, three to lead for changes … oh, G-d, Elspeth! I must get her away, too – mustn’t I? … unless I escaped and came back for her in force – by Jove, Brooke would jump at the chance of crusading against Ranavalona – if Brooke was still alive – no, I couldn’t face another of his campaigns … D--n Elspeth! And so my thoughts raced, only to return to the dusty heat and grind of Antan’, and the misery of existence.

      There were some slight blessings, though. I became interested in my army work, and enjoyed putting the troops through their manoeuvres, teaching them complicated wheels in line, slow marches, and so forth; I became quite friendly with senior men like Rakohaja, who began more and more to treat me as an equal, and even entertained me at their homes, the patronizing monkeys. Fankanonikaka noted this and was pleased.

      “Doing much fine, what? Dining nibs, much grub, happy boozing like h--l, tip-top society, how-de-do so pleased to meet you, hey? I seeing you Count Rakohaja, Baron Andriama, Chancellor Vavalana, other best swells. Watching Vavalana