Mother’s Only Child. Anne Bennett

met you that time?’ Joanne persisted. ‘You weren’t making for the bus that night, I bet’

      ‘That was different,’ Maria said. ‘Greg had been home on leave and that was his last night. Dora, who runs the store and post office with her daughter, Bella, went in and sat with my parents for me. Bella already looks after Mammy in the day and Dora sees to my father so I really can’t ask them to do more as a regular thing. It isn’t easy, you see, because my mother can be awkward and difficult—like a child, you know—and my father is almost completely helpless.’

      ‘You poor cow.’

      The sympathy in Joanne’s voice was nearly Maria’s undoing. She felt tears stinging the back of her throat. She blinked rapidly and willed them not to fall, and her voice was husky as she said, ‘Oh, it’s not so bad. I am getting used to it. And we have marvellous neighbours. A young man that used to work for Daddy in the boatyard comes in almost every night, I suppose on his way to the pub, to see my father. Daddy looks forward to it so much. I think he misses the company of men, you know, and of course the day is a long one for him. But Barney chats to him and they have a few drinks and a game of cards before Barney is on his way again.’

      ‘It is good to have people like that around you,’ Joanne said. ‘God knows, you need it,’

      Maria could only agree and admit to herself that she had been astounded by Barney’s thoughtfulness.

      ‘Well, I won’t press you to go out with us,’ Joanne said, ‘or keep asking, because there is nothing so annoying, but I want you to know that you would be welcome any time to come out with the crowd, if the opportunity should ever present itself. Or if things start to get on top of you and you need a night out, all you have to do is shout and I will drop everything to give you a good time, a bloody good time because you deserve it.’

      Behind the ensuing laughter there was hint of tears because Maria had been so moved by the understanding in Joanne’s voice. She knew she was lucky to work with such lovely people.

      In mid-November, Maria’s grandfather gave up his fight for life and slipped away at home and in his own bed as he’d wanted to.

      ‘I can’t possibly go,’ Maria said, as she read the telegram.

      ‘Of course you must go,’ Bella said.

      ‘How can I?’ Maria demanded. ‘I can’t leave Mammy and Daddy overnight, and that’s what it would mean. I can’t and won’t have you and your mother do more. You do enough already. Uncle Sean will understand and I’ll send a telegram now and a Mass card later that I will put a letter inside.’

      Bella said nothing. She was realising that Sarah was one body’s work. It took her and Maggie all their time to watch her and run the shop and post office; she’d not like to take the responsibility of having her overnight.

      Sean did understand what Maria was going through and as soon as he’d settled everything, he went up to visit them.

      Maria was delighted to see him, glad he’d travelled on Friday to stay the weekend for she couldn’t really afford to lose pay and maybe her job by taking time off. Sean was appalled by the whole set-up. Heartbroken though he was to see his only surviving sister so ill, and his brother-in-law crippled for life, his sympathies lay with Maria.

      Sean caught Sam’s eyes on Maria often that weekend as she busied about and Sean knew he felt bad about the things she had to do for him.

      ‘What can I do to help?’ he asked Maria.

      ‘Talk to Daddy,’ Maria said quietly. ‘I’m sure he must get lonesome and frustrated, though he never complains. Barney comes most evenings and they have a jar, play cards sometimes, but for all that it’s a long day for him, though Dora does her best.’

      ‘You’ll have to keep me abreast of things,’ Sam said to Sean, ‘for I have no news. One day for me is very like the one that went before and the ones yet to come. Barney tells me how things are now and again. Like he says, the Americans will be in the war soon.’

      Sean nodded. ‘Don’t see how they’re able to stay out of it now,’ he said. ‘They’re ready anyway. Been that way for months.’

      ‘What d’you mean?’

      ‘Well, they have bases built already,’ Sean said. ‘There’s one the other side of Lough Erne. I can see it plainly from the farm. And, what’s more, they’re dressed in the same uniform as the British, but they’re American all right. You only have to hear them talk.’

      ‘Would you believe it?’

      ‘One of my neighbours, who works in Derry, said there’s another one there too. Probably peppered all over, if the truth was told.’

      ‘Aye,’ Sam said. ‘Oh, here’s Barney, look.’ As the man came in the door he added quietly, ‘He’s been golden, so he has. Hardly misses an evening.’

      Barney approached the bed, glad to see Sam so animated by Sean’s visit. Sean had already hauled Sam into a sitting position, supported by the pillows, and when Barney produced the bottle of poteen from his pocket Maria didn’t say a word, but got the glasses from the cupboard.

      The first time Barney had suggested letting Sam have a drink, she’d been against it. ‘He’s always been a moderate drinker,’ she said. ‘He could take it or leave it.’ Not that he had the chance of much poteen, though she knew he liked a sip if he did.

      ‘Maybe he could take it or leave it when he had a pair of legs that worked,’ Barney said, ‘or a job of work to occupy him and support his family. For God’s sake, Maria, what has he now that you can deny him a bit of pleasure?’

      There was nothing, absolutely nothing, that Maria could say to that and she didn’t try. Nor did she ask where Barney got the bottles from. Sometimes it was better not to know those things. Anyway, with her father entertained, she could get her mother into bed, which wasn’t always easy. Sometimes it took all Maria’s powers of coaxing to get her to undress, put on her nightdress and get between the sheets. ‘Come on, Mammy,’ she’d say to her mother, who’d be standing resolute, arms folded over her chest and her mouth in a mutinous line. ‘Come on, to please me.’

      Sometimes, when she was tired and had a mountain of things waiting for her to attend to in the kitchen, she wasn’t so patient. ‘For God’s sake, Mammy, will you stop this and get your clothes off.’

      She always felt mean when she’d shouted at her mother. If her mother looked at her with eyes filled with reproach it was bad enough, but sometimes her bottom lip would tremble and she’d begin to cry. Maria would be consumed with shame and it would take longer than ever to settle Sarah for the night.

      ‘Will you be off to England now that Granddaddy is dead?’ Maria asked her uncle that first night as they sat before the fire with Barney long gone and Sam fast asleep.

      Sean was a wee while answering. The situation in the house worried him. Maria seemed to be working herself to death. How could he swan off to England as if it was no concern of his?

      ‘Not yet awhile,’ he said eventually. ‘Not while you are doing everything here. Now Daddy is gone, I’ll come up more at the weekends and share the load. While I’m here, you don’t have to worry about Sam, I’ll see to him.’

      ‘You don’t have to,’ Maria said. ‘Really you don’t.’

      ‘I do,’ Sean said firmly.

      ‘I’d hate to think of you putting your plans on hold again.’

      ‘It won’t be for ever,’ Sean said firmly. ‘Tell me about the young man Sam mentioned. Thinks a lot of him, he does.’

      The faint blush that flooded Maria’s face amused Sean, but there was no doubt in his mind that this was the one for her when she said, ‘Greg—that’s his name. He’s wonderful, tremendous, so he is, but he is in the army.’

      ‘And…?’ Sean prompted.