Results at the Top. Annis Barbara

Progress.”2

      However, if you consider that the aim is a fundamental change in the way men and women interact with each other at work, we can see progress continuing globally with distinct regional dynamics.

      That's the bottom line of our book. And unlike other books written today on the topic of advancing women, this is not another “your journey to diversity” book. We're offering more than that. We know what works and we're going to show you how to do it. We're going to share breakthrough insights, pinpoint the specific areas where you need to focus your attention, and give you the tools to make things happen.

      This book is unique in another way as well. There are few if any books on gender diversity targeted specifically to men and what men can and should do to support and champion the advancement of women. For decades, the burden for achieving parity in leadership, whether in business, education, or government, has been placed squarely, and wrongly, on the shoulders of women alone.

      That's changing. We see a growing realization on the part of male leaders all over the globe that women in balanced leadership with men leads to a bigger bottom line. These leaders are personally getting involved and seeing that their managers at all levels are walking the talk as well.

      Men in positions of power want to see more women on their executive teams and on their boards. Many confess, though, that they don't know what to do to make that happen. Many admit that they didn't know that they personally needed to be involved. They also admitted that they are seldom if ever invited to participate in gender diversity programs. But when we share with them the contents of this book, they're totally receptive, supportive, and enthusiastic about getting involved.

      Men, you are the last piece of the puzzle in this quest for the advancement of women, and this is your one‐of‐a‐kind guidebook in how to get personally involved and what specifically you can do.

      Women, you will find Results at the Top of huge value as well for its refreshingly different insights into why men on executive teams and boards – well, men in general – think and act as they do. You're going to learn a lot about yourselves as well in the chapters that follow.

      Most important, it will help women leaders in Human Resources and Diversity & Inclusion to know where and how we're suggesting men get involved. You may not be aware of the critical mass of men who want to be partners in this. So, we're inviting you to invite them!

      “Speaking of being partners in this, Richard, we've both been at this for quite a few years now. Let's tell our readers what first brought us together.”

      “I remember it well, Barbara. I was working inside, in banking, trying to effect change, while you were working outside, bringing Gender Intelligence to all kinds of industries everywhere.”

HOW WE CAME TOGETHER

      I first met Barbara in 1990 when she was asked by John Hunkin, then Chairman and CEO of the Canadian Imperial Bank of Commerce (CIBC), to come in and improve the working culture of CIBC and Wood Gundy, the retail brokerage division of CIBC Wealth Management.

      At that time, I was the senior manager in fixed income; I then moved to the equity division. It was that position in equity that opened my eyes to the company's maternity policy, something I initially tried to ignore. I'll explain that a little later on in this chapter.

      Richard Venn was one of the first men I ever knew who championed women in leadership. At the time, he was president of CIBC/Wood Gundy. Richard was directly involved in bringing Barbara and her Gender Intelligence workshops into the organization. I attended a number of sessions and remember them well. The business case and brain science opened my eyes to the value of difference thinking. Since then, Barbara and I have stayed in touch and tracked each other's work for twenty years.

      I remember Barbara facilitating the Gender Intelligence workshops with Wood Gundy. That firm was way ahead of the curve when it came to recognizing the value and need to have women in retail brokerage and in leadership. Wood Gundy was one of the first banks to tackle this issue and transform the trading floor culture.

      More companies today are discovering that in order to achieve superior performance, they'll need the critical thinking skills of both men and women on the board level, on the executive committee, and on every management team right down through to the market‐facing consultants, advisers, and sales teams.

      “You know, Richard, your recollection of when we first met takes me a little further back in my career and how I came to realize the necessity of engaging men in the advancement of women.”

BARBARA'S WAKE‐UP CALL

      The time was the early 1980s and the place was the multinational firm Sony. I was climbing the corporate ladder, well on my way to becoming Sony's first female sales manager. It had been a tough journey, but I made it to the top and raised three children at the same time. I felt like I had scored a great victory for women. I was sure my story would inspire working women everywhere. And I was sure I knew the formula for success: you had to behave like a man.

      Life at Sony was hectic, tough, and competitive. To tackle all the obstacles in my way, I attended – literally – a hundred coaching sessions on topics ranging from Assertiveness Training to Guerrilla War Tactics for Women. The sessions were more like military training camps than anything, but I kept going to them. Why? They worked! I won more outstanding performance awards than any of my colleagues did. I became such a tough manager that some of my colleagues nicknamed me “The Sherman Tank.”

      Like many working women at the time, I believed that to be equal to men women had to be the same as men. Actually, back in the 1970s and 1980s, many feminists believed women had to be the same but better – women had to study more, work harder, and perform better than men to succeed. Basically, everyone thought the only model for success was the male model.

      Nobody thought much about gender differences back then. Like everyone else, I thought “inferior to men” meant “less than men.” I bought into that thinking. I was a split personality: a man in the office, and a woman in my personal relationships and with my clients. I actually bought into the same is equal thinking so much that I decided to help other women learn to act more like men too. After all, it was the way to success.

      When I looked around, I saw a lot of women struggling to make it in the corporate world, but not that many actually running companies or sitting in boardrooms. I was sure it was because women weren't trying hard enough. I believed women were self‐defeating and took things too personally, or just failed to make themselves heard. I told women to get off it and stop being drama queens. That's what the men said – and I bought into it. I told women they had to become powerful, authoritative, and assertive, and suppress their emotions and talk like a boss. It worked for me!

      I stuck to this crusade for several years until one fateful incident at a workshop I was giving for women at the pharmaceutical company SmithKline Beecham. When I look back now, I can see how that workshop turned my whole world‐view upside down and led me to do the work I do today.

      The workshop had started the usual way, with me preaching on about how women had to take control of their lives. When I got to the part about how to gain respect from your boss, one woman in the group stopped me.

      “Why are you saying that it's women who have to change?” she asked. “What about men?”

      In my mind, different meant less. There was a hierarchy, and women were lower on the ladder. I told the woman, “If you're here, it's because you're missing something.”

      She didn't buy it. “We're not here because we think something's wrong with us. The problem is in the work environment. It is devaluing. That's all.”

      I stuck to my line. “If you feel devalued, maybe there's something wrong with the way you put yourself across.”

      But the woman didn't buy that either, and neither did any of her colleagues at the workshop. Exasperated, I ended the workshop and sent them home. I also went home – to think. And that's when I began to see that I had been getting it all wrong, all along. I understood that there was no point trying to make women act like men. Women were different from men!

      At

2

Nancy M. Carter and Christine Silva, “Women in Management: Delusion of Progress,” Harvard Business Review, March 2010, https://hbr.org/2010/03/women‐in‐management‐delusions‐of‐progress.