The White Rose of Memphis. Falkner William Clark

I was dying of curiosity, you see, and I thought maybe you could save my life by telling me something. I declare, something strange is going to happen; and you must tell me what it is.”

      “It would be an easy task to tell you all about it, if I knew anything about it myself; but as I happen to know nothing, how can I tell you anything?”

      “Pshaw! You are no true knight, Sir Ivanhoe, else you would not let a lady die of sheer curiosity, without an effort to save her. You are not like the brave knight of Ivanhoe of Sir Walter Scott’s creation.”

      “Show me an enemy who fights with steel, face to face, and then you’ll have cause to change your mind. By the by, what discoveries have you made about the black domino?”

      “Very little, I assure you – just enough to keep me on the rack. But have you really unearthed no secret respecting the two seedy men?”

      “Just enough to keep me on the rack, too.”

      “Well, aren’t you going to tell me what it is?”

      “I have been setting Greek against Greek, and you know what Byron says will happen when Greek meets Greek.”

      “Oh, bother Byron and his Greeks; tell me what you know?”

      “I bribed the chamber-maid and set her on the track of the seedy men.”

      “And, pray, what’s the result?”

      “They are sure-enough detectives; that much I have discovered through my spy.”

      “Good! What else?”

      “They are shadowing some one on this boat.”

      “They are doing what to some one on this boat?”

      “Shadowing him.”

      “Oh, is that all? You mean that they are keeping some one out of the sunshine.”

      “No, no! I mean to tell you that they have spotted their man.”

      “Spotted their man! Poor fellow! what color were the spots they put on him?”

      “Ah, Scottie, I perceive that you are not posted in regard to the peculiar language usually employed by the police department; when a detective officer sees a man who he thinks is the one he wishes to catch, he begins to follow and watch him, and this is called shadowing him.”

      “Ah, indeed! then what is meant by spotting their man?”

      “The same thing.”

      “Yes, yes, I see now; but who have they been spotting or shadowing?”

      “Ingomar.”

      “Goodness gracious! Is it possible?”

      “It is not only possible, but it is absolutely so.”

      “I declare, that is too bad! If I were a man I’d pitch ’em both overboard, so I would. They look like a brace of sneak thieves anyhow. What can they want with Ingomar?”

      “That I don’t know; but you may be sure I’ll find out ere long, for I have got a clever detective on their track; in other words, I have got them spotted.”

      “If a hundred witnesses were to swear that Ingomar was a criminal, I wouldn’t believe it.”

      “Don’t believe anything unless you want to, but what would you think if it should turn out after all that Ingomar has murdered his rival in love?”

      “Oh, horrible! Don’t speak so, I beseech you!”

      “Such things have happened, and why not happen again?”

      “Yes, but Ingomar is not a man of that sort; I’d risk my life on it.”

      “Well, now, I have told you all I know, let’s hear about the black domino.”

      “I have found out scarcely anything, except the fact that she is very sad, and is often found weeping in her state-room. I have been watching her closely, though she seems to avoid me as much as she can. I think the old gentleman with the white beard is her uncle, and I heard her say to him this morning that she could not endure it much longer.”

      “Endure what much longer?”

      “That was all I heard; but she was weeping as if her heart would break, and the old gentleman tried to comfort her, and I heard him say that the matter should be settled in some way soon.”

      “What matter did he say should be settled?”

      “How should I know? I have told you all I heard.”

      “I’ll put my detectives on her track, too, and I’ll unravel this business, if it takes all the money I possess. See here, Scottie, did you know that I am dying with curiosity to know your real name?”

      “Indeed, I did not.”

      “Well it’s so; and why not relieve me?”

      “Because the queen would be offended if I were to do it.”

      “Tell me your real name, and the queen shall never know of it.”

      “You shall know me when I know you, and not before.”

      “Very well; that is fair, at all events, and I am content. But I see the queen beckoning us to come to our seats to listen to Ingomar’s story.”

      As soon as the maskers were seated the queen ordered Ingomar to resume.

      “The next morning after Lottie had promised to be my wife, I mentioned the subject to Doctor Dodson, as I considered it my duty to do so.

      “‘I am going to be married, sir,’ said I, ‘as soon as I get my diploma.’

      “‘Ah, ha, indeed! and pray who’s to be the unlucky woman that you have resolved to render miserable for life?’

      “‘I don’t intend to make any woman miserable, neither do I expect to marry any woman.’ I said this rather sharply, as I felt a little ruffled.

      “‘Ah, ha! and you don’t mean to marry a woman, yet you say you are going to be married. I suppose you expect to marry a wood-nymph or a fairy. I guess you do not aspire to an angel.’

      “‘That’s exactly the state of my case; it’s an angel sure enough.’

      “‘When did she light on this part of the globe?’

      “‘Seven years ago.’

      “‘Ah, ha! here we come, you sly old rascal! I see how it is now. I have suspected you of villainous designs against Lottie for some time, and I see I was not mistaken; but look here, my boy, that dear girl is too good for you; she’s worth a thousand such bundles of humanity as you; and right here let me say a few words with the bark on them. If ever you speak a cross word to that dear girl, or give her an unkind look, the fact is, if you ever give her cause to regret her choice, I’ll – I’ll, yes, I’ll, ah, ha! I’ll give you a dose of strychnine, which is considered by the profession the most polite way of getting rid of mean dogs; ah, ha! don’t you see, my boy?’

      “He gave me a punch under the arm with his thumb. ‘Yes, ah, ha! I’ll poison you as I would a rat or a dog, if ever you dare to cause my little queen a moment’s pain.’

      “‘I promise to swallow all the strychnine in the drug-stores if ever I do an act willingly to give dear Lottie pain.’

      “‘There! there! ah, ha! spoken like a man. Here we come; take my hand, and my blessing with it, you rascal! Ah, ha! what a lucky scamp you are! What on earth possessed the girl, to make her fall in love with such an overgrown mushroom. Well, well, well! I can scarcely believe that Lottie is in earnest; she has agreed to marry you out of pure pity, you good-for-nothing scamp. Well, if Lottie is fool enough to marry you, I’ll be fool enough to give her all my property in order to enable her to support you; ah, ha! you see how it is, don’t you, my boy?’

      “I was very glad to see that the good old doctor was really delighted with the news of my engagement.

      “‘Ah, ha! Eddie, here we come, my boy! go to work, go to work;