The Time of My Life. Cecelia Ahern

opened and in no uncertain terms suggested that sex with him would sort me out. Thank you for that.’

      ‘At least I’m helping you meet men.’

      ‘I don’t need help meeting men.’

      ‘Perhaps in keeping them then.’ That was low and I think even he knew that. ‘So when can we meet again?’

      I sighed. ‘Look, I just don’t think this whole thing is going to work out with you and me. It might be good for other people but not for me. I really like my space, I like to do things without someone breathing down my neck all the time so I think the mature adult thing to do here is for you to go your way and I’ll go mine.’ I was impressed by my tone, by my firmness. Hearing my words, I wanted to separate from me, which weird as that is, was essentially what I was trying to do. I was trying to break up with myself.

      He was silent again.

      ‘It’s not as if every moment together is a bag of laughs either. We don’t even enjoy each other’s company. I mean, really, we should just walk away.’

      He still didn’t speak.

      ‘Hello, are you still there?’

      ‘Just about.’

      ‘I’m not allowed personal calls while at work so I should go now.’

      ‘Do you like baseball, Lucy?’

      I rolled my eyes. ‘I don’t know anything about it.’

      ‘Have you ever heard of a curveball?’

      ‘Yeah, it’s what the guys with the ball throw at the guys with the bats.’

      ‘Succinct as always. More specifically, it’s a type of pitch thrown in a way that imparts forward spin to the ball causing it to dive in a downward path.’

      ‘Sounds tricky,’ I humoured him.

      ‘It is. That’s why they do it. It catches the batsman out.’

      ‘That’s okay, Robin always rescues him. I think they’ve a thing going on.’

      ‘You don’t take me seriously.’

      ‘Because you’re talking about an American sport of which I know nothing of and I’m in the middle of my work and I’m seriously concerned about your mental health.’

      ‘I’m going to throw you one,’ he said simply, his voice playful now.

      ‘You’re going to …’ I looked around the room. ‘Are you in here? You’re not allowed play with a ball indoors, you should know that.’

      Silence.

      ‘Hello? Hello?’

      My life had hung up on me.

      Mere moments later Edna’s door opened again. Her eyes were back to normal but she looked tired. ‘Ah Lucy, there you are, could I see you for a moment, please?’

      Mouse’s eyes widened even more. Cock gave me a sad look; nobody left for him to pester.

      ‘Yes, sure.’

      I felt all eyes on me as I went into her office.

      ‘Sit down, there’s nothing to worry about.’

      ‘Thank you.’ I sat in front of her, perched on the edge of the desk.

      ‘Before I start, this came for you.’ She handed me another envelope.

      I rolled my eyes and took it from her.

      ‘My sister got one of those before,’ she said, studying me.

      ‘Really?’

      ‘Yes. She left her husband, and she’s living in New York now.’ Her face changed as she talked about her family but she still looked like a fish. ‘He was a bastard. She’s really happy.’

      ‘Good for her. Did she do an interview with a magazine, by any chance?’

      Edna frowned. ‘I don’t think so, why?’

      ‘Never mind.’

      ‘If there’s anything I can do to make you … happier here, then you’ll let me know, won’t you?’

      I frowned. ‘Yes, of course. I’m really fine, Edna, thank you. I think this was just a computer error or something.’

      ‘Right.’ She changed the subject. ‘Well, the reason I called you in is because Augusto Fernández, head honcho from the German office, is visiting us tomorrow and I was wondering if you would be able to take the lead and introduce him to the gang in here. Maybe we can do our best to make him feel welcome and let him know how hard we’re all working in here.’

      I was confused.

      ‘He doesn’t speak very good English,’ she said.

      ‘Oh. For a minute there I thought you wanted me to sleep with him.’

      It could have gone either way. Instead she threw her head back and laughed heartily. ‘Oh Lucy, you’re the perfect medicine; I needed that, thank you. Now I know you like to do your own thing at lunchtime but I’ll have to ask you to stay in here just in case he drops by. Michael O’Connor is showing him around the building, of course, but when he gets here it would be nice to welcome him to our little group. Tell him what everybody does and how hard we’re all working. You know?’ She was giving me the eye. Please don’t let any of us get fired. I liked that she cared.

      ‘No problem. I get it.’

      ‘How’s everyone doing out there?’

      ‘Like they’ve just lost a friend.’

      Edna sighed and I heard and felt the stress she must have been under. I left the office and they were all gathered around Mouse’s desk, like penguins huddled together for warmth afraid to drop their eggs, all looking at me in anticipation, pale faces worried that I’d been fired.

      ‘Does anyone have a spare cardboard box?’

      There was a chorus of distressed tones.

      ‘Just joking, but nice to know you care,’ I smiled and they relaxed but were a little annoyed. But then something Edna had said hit me and I suddenly tensed up. I knocked on the door, went back inside. ‘Edna,’ I said rather urgently.

      She looked up from her paperwork.

      ‘Augusto, he’s from …’

      ‘Head office, in Germany. Don’t tell the others, I don’t want them to worry any more than they already are.’

      Relief. ‘Of course. It’s just not a typical German name,’ I smiled. I went to close the door.

      ‘Sorry, Lucy, I understand what you mean now,’ she called out to me. ‘He’s Spanish.’

      I smiled but inside I wept. I was worried, I was very worried, because apart from having only just enough Spanish to order a round of Slippery Nipples and to ask for a limbo bar, I had very little other vocabulary in my head, and though they didn’t know it yet the team were relying on my schmoozing to get them through the next elimination process. It was only then when I sat down and saw the letters still lying on my desk that the conversation made sense.

      Him and his analogies; Life had thrown me a curveball.

      CHAPTER NINE

      ‘He did the Inca Trail last week, did you see that?’ my friend Jamie said to the table.

      We were in The Wine Bistro in the city, our usual haunt for catching