The Complete Ruby Redfort Collection. Lauren Child

the friends slipped down off their stools and headed in the direction of Twinford High.

      The bus had long gone.

      * * *

      ‘Late again! What a surprise,’ said Mrs Drisco, without one chime of surprise in her voice. ‘So what was it this time – the cat ate my homework?’

      ‘Oh, we don’t have a cat Mrs Drisco,’ said Ruby.

      The teacher pinched her lips together sourly. ‘Well, that’s a detention then,’ she said, writing a D in the register.

      ‘I have a note,’ said Ruby.

      ‘Well, unless it’s from the mayor himself, then I really don’t think I’m interested.’

      ‘Oh, it is,’ said Ruby.

      She reached down to her satchel, opened it and rifled through her notes and excuses section. There were notes inside for any occasion, arranged alphabetically. She selected the one she needed.

      Pulling out a piece of paper from the bag, Ruby handed it to Mrs Drisco. Mrs Drisco looked at the piece of paper most carefully. She put her glasses on and took them off again, then sat down. The note was most definitely signed by the mayor himself – it wasn’t a copy.

      Just how Ruby Redfort had come by this note is another story, but suffice it to say, Ruby kept a lot of things up her sleeve or, more precisely, in her satchel – who knew when they might come in handy? The Boy Scouts had it right: be prepared – it was front and centre in the Boy Scout handbook, a little bland in its delivery but a good rule. Ruby had chosen it as her RULE 11: EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED AND BE READY FOR ANYTHING.

       Chapter 9.

      All out of fish

      ‘SO HOW DID YOU PULL THAT OFF?’ asked an impressed Del Lasco at lunch recess. ‘You know, the trick with the note.’

      ‘It’s not a trick,’ said Ruby.

      ‘So how dya get it?’ said Del.

      ‘Ah, I have my sources,’ replied Ruby.

      ‘Yeah, well, a truly “good” friend would share those sources with her closest and mostest,’ said Del.

      ‘If you need me to get you out of a jam sometime Del, all you gotta do is make it worth my while,’ smiled Ruby.

      Clancy arrived at the lunch table, his tray teetering with high-calorie food. He was looking to put on a little weight, but the effort would no doubt prove fruitless, for it seemed no matter how much he ate, Clancy never got wider than a string bean.

      ‘So Clance, you gonna watch the swimathon on Saturday?’ asked Del.

      Clancy shivered. ‘No siree, I’ve got no interest in watching kids from Twinford Junior High get devoured by oversized fish.’

      Del looked at him like he had lost a few marbles. She turned to Ruby.

      ‘What’s with him?’ she said, pointing her thumb in his direction.

      ‘You know Clance, a boy with a fearful persecution complex – thinks the whole of marine life’s out to get him,’ said Ruby.

      Del punched him on the arm. ‘Get a grip Crew, nothin’s gonna bother taking a bite out of your shrimpy body.’ She took a big chomp out of her sandwich and continued to talk. ‘I wish it was our grade taking part in the swimathon; too bad only the kids in 9th grade get to swim.’ Del was captain of the 8th grade swim team and she relished any chance she got to compete.

      The 9th grade had been training for this for the past few months and, as a team-building exercise, Coach Newhart was taking them for a seafood cookout – not that he touched molluscs or crustaceans himself. Coach Newhart only ate real food and that meant food that walked on all fours on dry land – no fins, no feelers.

      Elliot came and joined them. ‘Hey, where’s Mouse and Red?’ he asked, looking around as if they might be under the table.

      ‘Chess club,’ said Del.

      ‘Red plays chess?’ he said.

      ‘She’s good actually,’ said Del. ‘Well, when she’s not knocking the pieces all over the board, she tends to win.’

      Elliot nodded, surprised but impressed. ‘So Rube, how was your vacation?’

      ‘You know, good,’ she replied.

      ‘So what did you do?’ he asked.

      ‘Swim,’ said Ruby.

      ‘Anything else?’ he enquired.

      ‘Cleaned the bathroom a few times,’ she said.

      ‘Well, thank you for that detailed account of your spring break,’ said Elliot. ‘That all sounds really interesting.’ He turned to Clancy. ‘So what did you do?’

      ‘Hung out mainly – with my sisters,’ replied Clancy through mouthfuls of fries. ‘My dad’s taking this Historical Society cruise; left on Friday, so he didn’t have time for us all to go away on a family vacation before – too busy.’

      ‘What’s the deal with that?’ asked Del. ‘He gets a vacation and you don’t?’

      ‘My dad says it’s not really a vacation; they’re learning about the legends and history of the Twinford coast. He says it’s good for the Ambassador to be seen on a trip like this,’ said Clancy. ‘Ruby’s mom and dad are on it too.’

      ‘Sounds like a riot,’ yawned Del.

      ‘Actually, the Sibling treasure legend is pretty interesting,’ said Ruby. ‘You should read up about it; as legends go, it’s a good one. Besides, it involves one of my ancestors.’

      ‘You’re kidding,’ said Clancy.

      ‘No way!’ said Elliot.

      ‘I don’t think you ever mentioned that before,’ said Del. ‘Well, maybe once or twice or perhaps three million times!’

      ‘Oh, ha ha,’ said Ruby flatly. ‘You guys just wish you had some kinda historical intrigue in your families; ain’t my fault that you got nothing to talk about.’

      The legend was roughly this: Ruby’s great-great-great-great-grandmother, Eliza, was sailing to South America on the family ship, the Seahorse, with all her worldly goods (very valuable ones by all accounts), when the boat was attacked by pirates who slaughtered all on-board. However, Eliza’s four-year-old daughter Martha, who was a smart child, the smartest anyone could remember, escaped death by hiding in a barrel of apples.

      When the pirates had finished raiding and murdering, they began collecting up the spoils from the Seahorse. But unfortunately for them, they hadn’t quite murdered everyone on-board – a few of the Seahorse crew who were still below decks took the remaining pirates by surprise and a violent battle broke out. Most of the pirates had already returned to their galleon, but those who were left fought to the death until the Seahorse, engulfed in flames, sank below the waves.

      Miraculously, the child, Martha, managed to escape by floating across the seas in the apple barrel, before eventually washing up in Twinford.

      The whole story sounded very far-fetched to Ruby, but she couldn’t deny its appeal. One intriguing part centred round something little Martha claimed to have seen. She was quite convinced of the fact that she had watched her mother carried from the boat by the pirates, kicking and screaming. Martha would not be dissuaded on this point – she was sure that her mother was still alive, although no one else believed it.

      The postscript to the story was also intriguing since it became a tale told to children all over the region. It was said that not so long after the Seahorse was wrecked and plundered, a beautiful woman was seen aboard a pirate vessel, raiding any ships that dared to sail in pirate waters. Some said they had seen her brandishing