Women With Attention Deficit Disorder: Embrace Your Differences and Transform Your Life. Sari Boone's Solden

emphasize that individuality is apparent throughout the brain. This variation is, for the most part, due to each individual’s unique experience of the world. We are learning that everything counts, that everything we experience impacts brain development. While the brain remains susceptible to environmental influences throughout life, the greatest impact occurs in utero, during the first stages of existence.

      Of particular interest is the role of hormones in the development of the brain, especially in regard to gender differences.

      It is now a commonly accepted fact that men and women’s brains differ as a result of exposure to different hormonal environments in the womb. This difference does not imply that one environment is preferable to the other, but simply that they each produce unique effects. After birth, the brain continues to develop and is constantly reorganized through the experience of the environment, especially that of the interpersonal and social milieu. Thus, along with the furious pace at which we are gaining knowledge about the brain and genetics, we are also reconfirming scientifically the belief that the social environment contributes a great deal to the development of the brain and the mind.

      For example, these social influences may cause a genetic condition such as Attention Deficit Disorder to be expressed quite differently even among members of the same family. By examining this interplay between genetics and environment, Sari Solden has broken new ground in Women With Attention Deficit Disorder: Embracing Disorganization at Home and in the Workplace, a book that follows that dictate of Dr. William Osler, who stated: “Ask not what disease the person has, but rather what person has the disease.” On both a personal and professional level, Solden explores just how women deal with the neurologic difference that is ADD. She at once narrows our perspective and broadens our understanding by revealing how the genetic composition of this disorder is manifested in women. Until recently, most disorders had been considered only from a limited perspective, one that explained how the condition was expressed in men. When data was presented regarding both sexes, gender differences at the level of genetics and development were rarely, if ever, reported. In examining the gender differences of ADD, not only hormonal but also social influences are important as well, especially as this disorder is often subtle and hidden from view.

      For a woman, the ADD traits of impulsivity, carelessness, forgetfulness, changeability and procrastination extend far beyond the environment of work or school to include every aspect of her life. They exist at the very core of a woman’s expectations of herself and of society’s expectations of her as well. The expectation that she will be the rock, the dependable, steady force in every situation causes her to be much more susceptible to the confining and crippling emotion of shame. This dynamic acts subtly, yet is extremely persuasive and often inhibits the growth from every direction of a woman who has ADD. In Women with Attention Deficit Disorder, Sari presents us with a number of meaningful anecdotes and a wealth of invaluable clinical lore. Her work represents one of the first attempts to broaden our perspective by focusing the experience of the genetic disorder on that of women alone. She provides us with a crucial understanding of a woman’s experience of ADD within a complicated social matrix.

      Dr. John J. Ratey, M.D., is an Associate Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School and has a private practice in Cambridge, Massachusetts. Dr. Ratey has authored the best selling book, A User’s Guide to the Brain. He has also co-authored Driven to Distraction (1994) and Answers to Distraction (1995) and Delivered from Distraction (2005) with Edward Hallowell, M.D., and Shadow Syndromes (1997) with Catherine Johnson, Ph.D.

      INTRODUCTION TO THE NEW EDITION by Peggy Ramundo and Kate Kelly

      A decade ago, we were happily writing the introduction for Sari’s groundbreaking book, Women with Attention Deficit Disorder. The subtitle, Embracing Disorganization at Home and in the Workplace, was a topic near and dear to Peggy’s heart, as she could be the poster child for the society for chronic disorganization. Kate, on the other hand, was organized, but at great cost. She simply limited her life severely, so that she was never caught in disarray, disorder or failing to meet a deadline. Kate also had a host of somatic symptoms that would give her an honored place in the hypochondriacs hall of fame. These ailments were the result of stuffing down the angst of trying too hard to keep it all together.

      Today, ten years later, we are confronting the organizational demon again. It is the eleventh hour and the partially completed new and improved introduction to Sari’s book is nowhere to be found. Not on our hard drives, in multiple email boxes or in the many piles we have sifted through in the search for this treasure. In the past, before we read Sari’s book and began the process of de-toxing those crippling layers of shame, it might have been time to get out the cyanide, or tar and feathers or something like that.

      So, after all the years of ADD recovery work, we are back at groundzero. All the systems in the world couldn’t save us from this last minute scramble. The same old-same old, but with one important difference—we are laughing. Joking our way through the process of letting go of the misplaced text, and starting over. But first, giving ourselves a virtual hug infused with a liberal dose of acceptance and approval.

      We have been ADD coaches for the past ten years, our clients mostly women. Almost without exception, these women talk about the book (Women with ADD) that “saved my life.” They are not kidding, and they are not being hyperbolic. They weep as they describe their profound sense of relief upon reading the book and finding that they are not alone; that there are sisters out there who are similarly oppressed by mountains of “stuff,” both physical and psychological.

      Perhaps the most important contribution Sari made, was to honor the heroic struggle of ADDult women, who are trying to keep themselves and everyone else in the family together while handicapped by weak attentional skills. One of the most devastating experiences for women with ADD is feeling you are drowning in a sea of trivia that everybody else can manage with their hands tied behind their backs. We women with ADD then feel not only that we are inadequate, but also that we are just whining about really silly stuff.

      Here are some of the comments our clients have made:

      “Did Sari install a nanny cam in my kitchen? How does she know so much about my life?”

      “I never realized that being a homemaker was such a difficult job when you have ADD - I just thought that I was a complete loser.”

      “I was able to schedule my first coaching session after reading Sari’s book. Before that I was too embarrassed and ashamed to talk to anyone about the reality of my life.”

      In the years since the first adult ADD book appeared on the horizon, there has been a whole host of excellent books written that offer a glimpse into the ADD mind and the ADD experience.

      None, however, has touched our hearts in the way that Sari did, when she laid bare her emotional experience and those of her clients in Women with Attention Deficit Disorder. Before Sari’s book came out, women with ADD were an invisible population. No one was talking about the possibility that the female form of the disorder presented very differently from the mostly male subjects profiled in the literature. The book inspired others to write about and begin researching the issues of women and girls with ADD.

      In this second edition of Women with Attention Deficit Disorder, you will find new, up-to-date information on medication and how to make decisions re: medical treatment. A special section on friendship challenges will help you, the reader, find ways to take down the walls of isolation and connect authentically with others. We are certain that you will appreciate the wealth of new information on how hormones play a critical role in the female ADD experience.

      If you are a new reader, you have a big treat in store for you. If you are a loyal fan of Sari’s work, you will be delighted with the new material that will add another dimension to your understanding of how ADD plays a role in your life. It may be time to give the book a second read in any case. Or a third, fourth . . . twentieth, etc.. Rereading a pivotal book like this one after more growth and life experience can lead to fresh insights. Give yourself, once again, the gift of healing laughter and tears. We did.

      Warmly,

      Kate Kelly and Peggy Ramundo