The Betrayal of the Body. Dr. Alexander Lowen M.D.

in this respect seems to be the rule. Even night terrors are often passed off as “normal” experiences, which the child will outgrow.

      Jack's body showed the typical schizoid features. It was thin, tight, and rigid, with an underdeveloped musculature, limited motility, and restricted respiration. It was an unalive looking body, from which Jack had dissociated his ego long ago. He had never seriously engaged in sports or other physical activities. His hypochondriacal anxiety expressed his fear of his body and his lack of identification with it.

      2. Peter, a seventeen-year-old boy, was referred for psychiatric evaluation after an alarming incident. He had gotten drunk one night following an argument with his girl friend. Then, to show her how much he cared, he took his guitar to her home to serenade her. Since it was late at night, her parents were disturbed by his actions. To quiet him, they invited him into their home. Once inside, Peter demanded to see their daughter and threatened to cut off his finger or his hand as proof of his affection. He became so unruly that he had to be forcibly restrained and returned home.

      Three months before this incident Peter had been involved in other troubles. He stole a car together with some friends. It was returned, and the boys admitted the theft. But, then, they ran away to avoid involving their parents, so Peter said. They broke into an empty home, stole some provisions, hid from the police, and thus compounded their difflculties with the law. Because Peter came from a good family and had a clean record, he was placed on probation. His delinquent behavior was blamed on his companions by his mother. Not until after the incident with his girl friend did she think that something could be wrong with Peter.

      That something was wrong could have been seen earlier. Before any of these incidents occurred, a problem had developed in his schoolwork. After two good years in high school, Peter began to have difficulty concentrating. His studies fell off badly in his junior year. He stayed out late, started drinking, and became unmanageable. But no one seemed to show concern until the crisis occurred.

      Peter's body was well built and well proportioned. His face had an innocent expression but was otherwise without feeling. This look of innocence had deceived his family. His eyes had a blank, empty quality. Despite its normal appearance, his body was tight and hard, and his movements were very uncoordinated. His knees and ankles were so stiff he could hardly bend them. His body lacked feeling, and even when he related the incident about his threat to cut off his hand he did so without feeling.

      During our discussions Peter said that his sexual contact with a girl provided the only warmth he experienced and that his life was meaningless without it. Seemingly, the need for this body contact was so imperative that it overrode all rational considerations. Without it he felt so empty and unalive that moral principles had no value. I find that this condition is typical of all the delinquents I have seen. Their search for kicks is an attempt to “get a charge” into an otherwise “dead” body. Unfortunately, this search for excitement takes the form of a dangerous escapade or a rebellion against authority. The lack of normal body feeling in these young people accounts for their preoccupation with sex.

      If the schizoid disturbance is not understood, delinquent behavior will continue to puzzle the authorities and the families of these young people. It will be blamed on a lack of family discipline or attributed to a moral weakness in the youth. While these explanations have some validity, they overlook the dynamics of the problem. An ego that is not grounded in the reality of body feeling becomes desperate. In its desperation it will act destructively toward itself and others.

      3. Jane was a young woman of twenty-one who came into therapy following the breakup of a romantic affair. She felt lost and desperate. She sensed that something was seriously amiss with her personality, but she didn't know what it was or how to handle it. We can gain some idea of her problem from the following story:

      I remember in my teens thinking I was at war with myself. Especially at night, in bed, I felt I was at war with something in me. It was very frustrating and very hopeless. I felt so confused. I didn't know whom to ask.

      At eleven, I discovered my body. Before that I took it for granted. I gained a lot of weight and became self-conscious. I also began my periods at this time. The more inhibited I became, the more weight I gained and the less real I felt. I started masturbating one year later. I thought I would get pregnant or a venereal disease. I felt very guilty about it. But I would also have to masturbate before I could do anything. If I had to write a paper for school, I would procrastinate until I finally masturbated. Then I could do it.

      Throughout this period I had a constant fantasy. I fantasized that I was riding a horse. Everyone else had a horse, but mine was better than theirs.

      Men absolutely terrified me. I had no friends through high school and only one date in college.

      Jane was at war with her sexual feelings. She could neither accept them nor repress them. The result was an intense conflict that tormented her and from which she attempted to escape through the world of fantasy. In her fantasy, the horse can be interpreted as a symbol of the body, especially the lower half. Her attempt to deny the reality of her body was only partially successful. Its feelings intruded on her consciousness and demanded satisfaction even at the price of enormous guilt.

      The split in Jane's personality was also manifested on the physical level, in a very striking way. From the waist down, Jane ‘s body was heavy, hairy, and dark-hued. Her hips and thighs were large and their muscle tone was poor. Above her waist she was dainty: her chest was narrow; her shoulders sloped sharply down; her neck was long and thin; and her head was small, with regular features. The skin tone of the upper half of her body was fair. The contrast between the two halves was sharp. From the lower half of her body one had the impression of sexual maturity and womanhood that was ripe, or perhaps, in view of its flaccidity and heaviness, overripe. The upper half of her body had an innocent, childlike appearance.

      Who was Jane? Was she the dainty creature riding regally on the lower half of her body or was she the horse with whom she also identified and upon whom her ego rode like a queen? Obviously, she was both, but she was unable to reconcile these two aspects of her personality.

      4. The next case, though less severe in its manifestations of illness, presents another aspect of the schizoid disturbance. Sarah was a divorcee with a five-year-old son. The breakup of her marriage was quite a shock to her and brought on a deep depression. I diagnosed her character structure as schizoid although her superficial behavior gave little evidence of so severe a disorder. She expressed her problem as follows:

      It's not that I'm unreal, yet I feel that my relations to people are not real. I often wonder what people think of me when I am doing something. I have delusions of grandeur. I feel that they must think I'm great. But really, I see that I can't cope. My performance doesn't measure up to my expectations.

      I had been aware of an arrogance in Sarah's manner and speech which is typical of certain schizoid individuals. Sarah impressed me as one who thought she had superior qualities or superior intelligence. When I questioned her about the nature of her delusions of grandeur, she replied:

      My delusion is that I have a good character in general. For example, even now, I expect people to say what a good mother I am. How well I treat my son! I was always the teacher's pet. I never disobeyed. I was a classic “goody-goody.”

      Sarah was a small girl-woman with a petite, dainty face, square shoulders, and delicate body structure. Her physical appearance suggested a frightened, immature person, while her speech and manner reflected maturity and confidence. This contradiction in her personality suggested a schizoid disturbance. But there were other signs of unreality about Sarah, despite her statement to the contrary. These signs were mostly physical: the lack of contact between her eyes and mine, a frozen quality in her facial expression, a rigidity of the body structure, and a lack of coordination in body movement.

      Sarah played a role, that of the “good” compliant child who did what was expected of her and did it well. Her role playing was so unconscious that she expected people to approve of her as if she were a child. Many people play certain roles in life without thereby becoming schizoid. It is a matter of degree. When the role dominates the personality, when the whole is lost in the part (the part acted out), when, as in Sarah's case, the person cannot be seen