Strength. Sue Patton Thoele

break free, and reconstitute ourselves by emulating the fluid, yet determined, feminine aspects of water. Our physical bodies are already approximately 60 percent water; let's saturate our mental, emotional, and spiritual bodies with watery Sacred Feminine energy and invite our complete self to be in the flow.

      One great example of peaceful, persistent feminine power is shown in the documentary Pray the Devil Back to Hell. It tells of a peace movement called Women of Liberia Mass Action for Peace. Organized by a Liberian social worker, Leymah Gbowee, Muslim and Christian women came together dressed in white to pray for peace and participate in nonviolent protests to demand a resolution to the country's civil war. Their movement eventually led to the election of the first female president of an African nation.

      During your day . . .

       As you use and enjoy water, appreciate it's life-giving presence.

       If you feel constricted or trapped by a situation, imagine how water might find her way out or through.

       Notice which of your subpersonalities are best able to go with the flow.

       Water is of all things most yielding and can overwhelm that which is most hard.

      —TAOIST ADAGE

      INTEGRATING HEART AND HEAD

      In our quest to live balanced, happy lives, learning to integrate the feminine heart and masculine head energies within our own psyches is essential. Both energies are God given, and each has beneficial qualities. Many men and women have recognized that true balance comes from liberating the feminine in men and the masculine in women. In reality, almost everything worth doing or being requires both heart and head attributes to be successful. Life is much easier and more fun when both are balanced and cooperative.

      I've noticed many of us, male and female alike, are expressing more head than heart energy. That's okay as long as your behavior feels comfortable and genuine. Although I can be competitive in games, I don't feel right expressing hard-edged, aggressive energy except in the privacy of my own mind or with a trusted friend who is not the target. In order not to suffer guilt and remorse, I need to transform conquering and controlling mental energy before I talk with someone about issues and misunderstandings. Only after taking the aggression out of my feelings can I engage in a heart-centered discussion with the hope of finding more understanding and a win-win solution for everyone. Others I know find fiery encounters stimulating and fun. No matter what your individual comfort zones, the important thing is to relate to yourself and others authentically.

      If you spend a great deal of time in an environment that demands a lot of mind/striving/outer head energy, you instinctively know when it's time to give intuitive/relational/feminine heart energy some attention. On the other hand, if you spend most of your time nurturing your family or in a career such as nursing, your mental head side could probably use some time in the spotlight. Balancing both energies promotes peace of mind, heart, and body.

      During your day . . .

       With an open mind and heart, notice how much time you spend in your head versus your heart.

       Does the balance feel like an authentic representation of who you are? If so, great. If not, what changes might be helpful?

       The authentic self is the soul made visible.

      —SARAH BAN BREATHNACH

      MIRRORING JESUS AND ROSA PARKS

       Male and female represent the two sides of the great radical dualism. But, in fact, they are perpetually passing into one another. Fluid hardens to solid, solid rushes to fluid. There is no wholly masculine man, no purely feminine woman.

      —MARGARET FULLER

      The preceding quote points out the intermingling of energies that Jesus and Rosa Parks so beautifully illustrated in their lives.

      As portrayed throughout history, Jesus appears to have been a sterling example of a man who lived from his heart even though residing in a patriarchal era and raised in a male-dominated religion. He reportedly liked and respected women, helped all those who needed it, taught and modeled love and acceptance for all, and forgave under the most extreme circumstances. I imagine him as friendly and outgoing while also requiring silence and solitude to refresh his soul. And he must have been tremendously charismatic and purposeful to impart teachings that still influence millions today. To me, he is the perfect example of unconditional love.

      I'm so thankful to my Sunday School teachers who portrayed Jesus as someone to trust rather than fear, and as a result, I've been enamored of him since I was a little girl. To this day, I often feel his presence especially when in need of comforting. To me, Jesus epitomizes integration of heart and head and masculine and feminine energy.

      In a very different way, Rosa Parks is also a great example of integration (accidental pun). Although she was actually the second African American woman who refused to give up her seat to a white passenger, her peaceful yet resolute refusal and arrest led to the 1955 Montgomery bus boycott. As a result of the thirteen-month boycott, important changes were made in the existing laws, and Rosa Parks's part in that caused the U.S. Congress to call her the first lady of civil rights and the mother of the freedom movement.

      Even if the examples of Jesus and Rosa Parks don't resonate with you, I imagine there are people in your life who have the wonderful ability to combine heart and head energy in complementary ways. Maybe one of those is you.

      During your day. . .

       Be aware of opportunities to use both your heart and head in dealing with simple occurrences.

       Think of people you know who blend masculine and feminine energies wisely and effectively.

       Congratulate yourself when your heart and head are in sync.

       Allow your life to reflect all aspects of your being.

      BEING AMUSED AND EDUCATED BY SHADOW

      One of the most fruitful connections we can make is with the shadow aspects of our personalities, for they often represent unhealthy roles we've fallen into or strengths we are not fully expressing. A great way to become acquainted with active shadow sides is through subpersonality exploration. I've already introduced you to two of my shadow aspects, Brunhilda and Miz Perfection. Brunhilda, whose quality is the strength to stand up for myself, is the shadow side of Strong Adult Sue. I needed Brunhilda to show up in her dramatic warrioress form to grab my attention and help me balance her counterpart, Terminal Nice Girl. Miz Perfection is the shadow version of Madame Reliable-Responsible, and not surprisingly, her qualities are reliability and responsibility. In shadow form, however, those beneficial qualities become compulsion and perfectionism. Anxiety, nervousness, and stress alert me to Miz Perfection's presence. Knowing she's in the driver's seat allows me to take over the steering wheel and make more self-supportive choices.

      When we are connected to the magical essence of feminine energy, we feel spaciousness, generosity, joy, love, and all the other good stuff. Contrarily, when immersed in our shadow selves, we feel constricted, miserly, depressed, manipulative, victimized, ashamed, bitchy, and sometimes downright mean.

      Getting to know and appreciate our shadow sides is enlightening and life-enhancing; however, acting directly from them can be iffy and possibly destructive.

      We all have shadow sides. They are invaluable teachers, natural and educational parts of being a multifaceted human being. They can also bring a lot of fun, spice, and excitement to our lives. Given their helpful nature, it is appropriate