The Sister Book. Kristi Thom

in your family is a good

       excuse for the whole family to celebrate.

      So when your sister gets that piano solo, tell

       her how proud you are of her. If your brother

       has a big game or performance coming up,

       ask whether there’s anything you can do to

       help him prepare. If your sib has a part in a

       show, get tickets and go!

      Maybe there’s a little part of you that feels

       jealous of a sister’s or a brother’s happy news,

       though. That’s normal, especially if you feel

       like nothing special has happened to you in

       a while. But try to shake off those feelings by

       remembering that something good happen-

       ing to someone else doesn’t say anything

       about your accomplishments at all. Maybe your sib’s success will even inspire you or show you the way to a success of your own. And if you can be enthusiastic for your sibling now, she will remember it when it’s your turn to shine. That day will come for you, too.

      Signs of Celebration

      Make a banner for your sibling with a mes-

       sage of congratulations or encouragement.

      Put together a playlist of songs from the

       play that your brother is starring in.

      Write a card telling your sister how much

       you think she deserves this and how happy

       you are for her.

       Ask a parent to help you frame

       an award, an announcement,

       a photo, or a program.

      . . . and Bad Days

      “I didn’t get picked for the play.”

      “I have to wear this cast for a

       whole month.”

      “My best friend isn’t talking to me.”

      “The doctor said I can’t ever eat

       anything with gluten in it.”

      When something hard or disappointing hap-

       pens to sisters and brothers, they’re bound to

       feel down, at least for a little while. The good

       news about bad news is that there are things

       you can do to help your sib feel better.

      The best thing you can do is pretty simple:

       Just listen. You don’t have to know how to

       solve the problem. Sometimes being able to

       talk about it helps a person feel better, be-

       cause she knows someone cares. Sometimes

       thinking out loud helps a person figure out

       for himself what he needs to do. And when

       a problem is big enough to change a person’s

       whole life, talking can help that person get

       used to the new way things are going to be.

      So let your brother talk if he wants to. And

       tell your sister you’re sorry about whatever

       happened. If you have ideas about what your

       siblings can do, ask if they want to hear them.

       But it’s OK to just listen to what your sib has to

       say without saying much yourself.

      You can also be an even kinder version of your

       normal self while your sib is in a slump. Maybe

       you can offer to play your brother’s favorite

       game with him or let your sister have an extra

       cookie or an extra turn. You can do small

       favors or let things slide when you usually

       wouldn’t. If your sibling doesn’t seem happier

       right away, don’t be discouraged. Your acts of

       kindness really do make a difference.

      Ask a parent for ideas on how to help, too,

       especially if it’s something big. Maybe the

       doctor said your sister can’t eat certain foods

       anymore. Or maybe your brother broke his leg

       and has to wear a cast this summer. You and

       your parents can come up with ways to help

       your sibling not feel left out and get used to

       the situation.

      Signs of Support

      Write a note or draw a picture that lets

       your sister know how much you care.

      Ask your brother if he’d like to just hang

       out with you for a while and talk about

       what’s on his mind.

      Get a book from the library by your sister’s

       favorite author, or a book with information

       about her problem.

      Give your sibling a hug—and repeat often!

      Thoughtful Things

      No matter the reason, you can let your sibling know you’re thinking of her

       with one of these simple ideas.

      Caring Coupons

      These are fun to make and even more fun for

       the other person to use. Make a list of things

       your sister would probably like you to do for

       her. Try ideas like “Good for making your bed

       one time” or “Good for doing one of your

       chores.” Write them on slips of paper, deco-

       rated to look like coupons. Tuck them into an

       envelope, and give them to your sib.

      Personal Poem

      Write the letters of your brother’s name

       vertically on a piece of paper. Then use each

       letter to start a line of a poem about him.

       Try to capture his personality and some of

       the things you love most about him.

      Banner Day

      Make signs cheering your brother on to

       victory! Write encouraging messages on

       colorful pieces of paper. Place them where

       he will be happy—or maybe surprised—to

       see them. Inside a desk drawer, in his back-

       pack, and on the chair where he usually sits

       for breakfast are all good places.