The McCabe Girls Complete Collection: Cat, Fen, Pip, Home Truths. Freya North

      ‘Jesus, what’s up?’ Fen asked.

      ‘Up?’ Cat replied, concerned at her sister’s tone.

      ‘It’s so early – are you OK?’ Fen persisted.

      ‘Oh shit!’ Cat exclaimed, the time difference dawning on her. ‘I’m fine. I just wanted to call. To say hullo.’

      ‘I see,’ said Fen measuredly.

      ‘Um,’ Cat faltered, ‘also for some advice.’

      ‘Advice?’ Fen asked. ‘About—?’

      ‘What to wear today?’ Cat said meekly, peeping through the curtains and assessing the flat but dry prelude to dawn.

      ‘What to wear?’ Fen repeated, looking out the window to a rain-dressed pavement. Fen contemplated her sister’s loaded silence and wondered if Cat could sense that, back in Camden, she was grinning. ‘What to wear,’ Fen repeated, this time as a statement. ‘Tell me it’s the doctor and not some oily bike boy,’ Fen whispered with glee.

      ‘It’s the doctor,’ said Cat, eyes squeezed shut as if a revelation out loud might ultimately jeopardize the actuality of a currently non-existent situation. ‘Do you think that’s OK?’

      ‘More than OK,’ said Fen, ‘it’s about time.’

      ‘I thought of my khaki shorts,’ said Cat.

      ‘What’s his name and age and vital stats?’ Fen asked. ‘Khaki sounds good.’

      ‘And my little stretchy vest from Gap Kids,’ Cat furthered. ‘Ben York, probably a few years older than us, tall but not too tall – handsome, oh yes, very.’

      ‘I like your stretchy vest from Gap Kids but what’s the weather like? Perhaps add a white shirt, loosely tied not buttoned,’ said Fen. ‘So where is he from? Does he speak English?’

      ‘I have that great shirt that Pip gave me,’ said Cat, taking it from the pile on her bed and holding it to her nose. ‘He’s British but lives in America.’

      ‘That’s no good,’ Fen groaned.

      ‘The white shirt?’ Cat asked, scouring the pile for an alternative.

      ‘No – the America bit,’ said Fen, ‘an intense three weeks in France and then what?’

      ‘I hadn’t thought that far ahead,’ Cat said, ‘it’s nice just to feel those feelings of, well, lust – anticipation. Have we decided on the white shirt?’

      ‘Yes,’ Fen declared. ‘Is there chemistry?’

      ‘I think so,’ said Cat cautiously, hoping that she had neither misread nor read too much in to what she believed had been a mutual frisson, ‘it’s been a long time for me. Timberland boots or trainers?’

      ‘Sweet girl,’ said Fen, ‘I wish you all the luck and lust you’ll have time for once your reports have been filed. But be careful – it’s the Tour de France, you’re not living in real time or a real place. In reality, Cat, you need a fling. You deserve fun and frolics. He sounds perfect. Fling Thing. He sounds,’ said Fen, ‘pretty gorgeous. Timberlands.’

      ‘His name is Ben York,’ Cat remonstrated, ‘and you’re making him sound like a cheap package holiday. Timberlands it is, then.’

      ‘He’ll do you the same power of good – a golden tan from the sun equates with the healthy glow of a well-laid woman,’ Fen theorized earnestly.

      ‘Fen!’ Cat giggled. ‘What are you like? You loose lady, you – you who can’t decide between two – have you chosen yet?’

      ‘No,’ Fen said sadly after a long reflection. ‘Tell me more about Ben.’

      ‘He has odd eyes,’ Cat said with a swoon.

      ‘Odd?’ Fen reacted, imagining one brown, one blue, perhaps cross-eyed or else one lazy and staring.

      ‘I mean,’ said Cat, ‘strange – they’re the colour of Cadbury’s Dairy Milk and they hold your gaze.’

      ‘Think about your underwear,’ said Fen. ‘Not that he should be seeing it quite yet but your deportment is directly accountable to the pants you wear.’

      ‘He has odd hair,’ said Cat. ‘I’ll wear my Calvins.’

      ‘Odd?’ Fen asked, imagining a ginger bonce of unruly curls not dissimilar to the wig Pip wore when she became Martha the Clown.

      ‘Short,’ said Cat, ‘dark but not really – heavily flecked through with light.’

      ‘You mean,’ Fen deduced, ‘he’s going grey prematurely. Well, George Bloody Clooney watch your back! Calvins – definitely.’

      ‘I think he likes me,’ Cat said. ‘I won’t bother with a bra – my Gap Kids vest is supportive enough. And clingy.’

      ‘Go girl!’ Fen marvelled. ‘Of course he bloody likes you – why on earth wouldn’t he? Can I tell Pip?’

      ‘Isn’t that tempting Fate?’

      ‘Bollocks, Cat,’ Fen laughed, ‘have a little confidence.’

      ‘I lost it a while back.’

      ‘No!’ Fen said sternly. ‘It was stolen from you. You’re entitled to its return. Can I tell Pip?’

      ‘OK!’ Cat laughed. ‘Tell her about his eyes – and that he’s a doctor and all.’

      ‘Can I tell Django?’

      ‘Wouldn’t that be bad karma?’ Cat asked. Fen, who felt more for karma than she did for fate, pondered this quietly. ‘Tell you what,’ Cat said, ‘if Sassetta wins the Stage today, you can tell Django.’

      ‘Better make that the maillot vert, Cat,’ Fen said very seriously. ‘If he scoops up the intermediary sprints and finishes higher than Cipollini, he needn’t win the Stage to claim the jersey.’

      Cat smiled. Her sister had caught the bug. There was no cure. It was in her blood. She would never be rid of it.

      Where’s Ben? Dr York – ou es tu? And can I ‘tu’ you or ought I to ‘vous’ you? You’re not with the Megapac entourage.

      Cat was milling about the teams enclosure with hundreds of other journalists, Tour and team personal.

       Oh, there’s Mario Cipollini.

      ‘Mario! Ça va?’

      ‘Buon giorno!’ said Cipollini whilst wondering who this girl was who greeted him with such warmth and familiarity. How charming. ‘I’m well – today SuperMario to be LionKing again – compris?’

      ‘Oh, compris very well, Cipo,’ said Cat, not giving the abbreviation a second’s thought. ‘Bonne chance.’

      ‘Merci, grazie,’ said the flamboyant Italian before brandishing his best English, ‘thank you so very much, signorina.’

      Cat brazenly waved her hand as if to say heck, Mario, don’t mention it. Off she went in search of Dr York, smiling directly at Laurent Dufaux on her way. Jan Svorada, Jose Maria Jimenez, Jacky Durand all raised a hand at a girl they had never met, who was wearing a pair of shorts as flattering as her smile and who gave them salutations of great feeling as she strode past.

      Where are you, Dr York? Might you be in the village? I’ll go and check. Bugger off, Alex, I’m on a mission. I’m thirsty. Ah, the Maison du Café stand. I’ll have an espresso, please. Merci beaucoup. Good God – Eddie Merckx – good God himself.

      ‘Bonjour, Monsieur Merckx.’

       ‘Eh? Ah oui –