Classic Bestsellers from Josephine Cox: Bumper Collection. Josephine Cox

that desperate moment she felt more lonely than she had felt at any time in her life. She desperately needed to speak with Amy, about the things that played on her mind. She needed to open her heart and tell of the things that haunted her; and the other things that had made little Johnny the frightened shadow he had been, before Amy had won his trust and his love.

      But however much she wanted to open her mouth and let the words come out, they stuck fast in her throat. She would have left Arnie years back and for many reasons, but where would she go? And, besides, she loved him. That was the trouble.

      As they neared the gate, Amy saw how even in the warmth of the day, Maureen’s face was drained of colour. ‘You’d best sit down,’ she urged, leading her to the bench. ‘You look so tired, Maureen.’

      For a moment, Amy sat beside the older woman, and together they watched Johnny as he played on the grass. Suddenly Amy realised that Maureen was softly crying, the tears rolling down her face and her whole body shaking.

      ‘Tell me what’s haunting you?’ she urged tenderly. ‘Whatever it is, you need to share it.’ She could feel Maureen’s pain. ‘Please, Maureen, for your own sake, let me help.’

      Wiping away her tears with the cuff of her sleeve, Maureen nodded. ‘Will you promise not to tell anyone?’

      Without hesitation Amy agreed, and as Maureen told her the whole sorry tale, she learned why Johnny had become the way he was.

      Maureen told her how some years ago her husband, a man of uncertain temper, had thrown her out on the streets and taken another woman into his bed. ‘For a long time I was awfully lonely … even suicidal at one stage. But I pulled myself up and found a little job with a room as well. Then I met a new man, and everything was going along nicely.’

      ‘So what happened?’ Maureen had not mentioned the name of any man, not once in all their conversation. That was a curious thing.

      ‘Then I became pregnant and right from the day Johnny was born, his father resented him. Sometimes, when he came home drunk, he would stand over Johnny’s cot and stare at him for ages. He wouldn’t do or say anything, he would just stand at the foot of the cot and stare at him. It used to frighten me so much, that as soon as his daddy had gone to his bed, I’d sneak Johnny out of the cot and take him with me, to the spare room.’

      Amy thought Johnny’s father must be mad and said so.

      ‘There were times when I thought that too,’ Maureen admitted, ‘but things did get better, and as Johnny started walking and looking more like a boy than a baby, and had learned to say “Daddy”, they seemed to get closer.’

      Lowering her voice so the boy wouldn’t hear, she went on, ‘I found out later, it was just an act.’

      Amy wasn’t surprised at that. ‘What do you mean? How did you find out?’

      ‘It was a day much like today,’ Maureen explained. ‘The sun was shining and the boy was restless. I’d been poorly that night – tummy upset or something. Anyway, I was feeling under the weather. He offered to take the boy out of my way for a while … down to the bridge, where they could watch the barges passing underneath. This is what, I learned later, happened.

      ‘They were heading down the street towards the bridge with Johnny running ahead, and suddenly he fell over. He started crying and wouldn’t stop, and that was when his father laid into Johnny with his fist.’

      ‘My God, that’s awful!’

      ‘Luckily, a man who was passing witnessed it all, rescued Johnny and saw his father off. This man was, by the greatest good fortune, Arnie, my husband. He was alone again, regretting what he’d done, and had been watching over us. It was fate – I know it was. He brought Johnny to me and that was when I knew we were meant to be together.’

      A look of shame shadowed her homely face. ‘You see, I still loved him. I never stopped loving him, not once. But pride had stopped me contacting him. And with another man’s child in tow, I was certain he’d want nothing to do with me anyway.’

      Amy could hear Maureen’s love for this man shining in her voice as she spoke. ‘So you went back to him in the end?’

      ‘I had to.’ Maureen’s quiet smile was evidence enough of the way she felt towards her husband. ‘He had always been my life and always would be. The time when we were apart was the worst time of my life. But there have been bad times since.’ Her voice quivered. ‘Sometimes I wonder if it might have been wise not to have gone back to him. But he’s never laid a hand on Johnny, and whatever else he’s guilty of I’m grateful for that.’

      ‘And Johnny …?’ Only now was Amy beginning to realise the extent of worry Maureen had endured.

      ‘He was black and blue. I realised after that bruises I’d taken to be the result of tumbles while playing had probably been caused all along by his father hitting him.’

      Maureen finished, ‘He would shy away from strangers and even though Arnie did the best he could to get close to the boy, Johnny cowered away from him. He became terrified of all men. From that day to this, he’s never forgotten.’

      She looked at Johnny and a shine came into her eyes that told Amy how much she loved the child. ‘I’ve never forgotten either,’ she murmured. ‘I never will.’

      Amy was curious. ‘And how are things between you and your husband now?’ She didn’t want to pry, but she wondered if the husband being absent had anything to do with what had happened to Johnny. Maybe the child had been unable to cope with the presence of any man.

      Maureen was tempted to tell her the truth. She trusted Amy, but was it fair to burden her with the facts? How would Amy take it if she knew that Arnie was in prison for beating Sylvia Hammond half to death?

      She decided not to mention it at all. More than anything, she did not want to risk losing Amy’s friendship.

      ‘We went through a bad patch,’ she told Amy now. ‘The landlord sold the house from under us, and Arnie got a job working down South.’ She hated lying to Amy, but it had to be done. ‘Meanwhile, I had to find a place for me and the boy. That’s when I heard about the house on Derwent Street. It’s only two bedrooms, but that’s all we need, and the rent is cheap. We got a bit of money from the sale of our furniture and belongings when we left the other house, so we’ll manage all right, as long as I count the pennies. I’m keeping a lookout for work in a hotel kitchen, or a shop, where I might be able to take Johnny with me.’

      ‘Have you seen anything yet?’ Amy would have offered to look after Johnny while Maureen went off to work, but the shop was busy most times and she didn’t think her mother would welcome a small child under her feet while trying to serve the customers. Still, if she could help Maureen in any other way, she would. ‘If you got a little job, I’d always be willing to take Johnny off your hands,’ she offered. ‘I’d even change my day off, if that suited.’

      ‘Aw, that’s lovely of you to offer,’ Maureen said gratefully, ‘but I know how hard you work, and I would never dream of taking up your one day off. Don’t you worry, I’ll find something suitable, I’m sure. There might even be somebody on the Saturday market that would let me help run the stall and take Johnny along.’

      That idea had been playing on her mind these past few days. ‘I’ll go through the market this Saturday,’ she said hopefully. ‘Who knows, I might just be lucky?’

      ‘When will your husband be coming back?’

      ‘I’ve no idea.’ Maureen gauged her answer carefully. ‘Like I say, he’s working for a developer, and they’re building right across the South. So there’s no telling how long it might be before he comes back.’

      Such lies! But, if she and Johnny were to lead normal lives, the truth must be kept from everyone … even the lovely Amy. ‘He’s got our new address, so I’m sure he’ll let me know when he’s on his way back.’

      Amy knew instinctively that